Child of Snow: a Tale of Redwall

[AnnaofRedwall]

ok... this is a story i started about 1/2 a year ago, but got bored of...(writers block)... i thought that maybe i should post it and see what you lot bally well think!!!  I copy-pasted my Snow story in a new topic so i could edit it. here 'tis.

PS: this is the link to the feedback page here,  so if you could write what you think here:http://redwallabbey.com/forum/index.php?topic=4205.msg196079#msg196079 I'd be very thankful.

Prologue

The waves of the cold North Sea pounded endlessly over the broken hull of what had once been the most feared ship to ever sail the Seven Seas! Beasts did not fear the ship in itself, it was her captain that terrified them. Maddox Deathshadow! The Deathwind! A name that struck fear into everybeast that heard it. Of course, they did not fear Maddox without reason, the pitch-black ferret was the most ruthless killer since the time of the Wearats. Maddox was much smaller than most males of his kind, but that did not lessen his physical prowess, or his ruthlessness. Maddox was not overly concerned over the wreck of his ship, his goal did not lie in the salty waters of the sea nor any in any distant land far from the shore he stood upon. No, his goal lay in the depths of the lush, green forest of Mossflower. Redwall Abbey! The calm that had settled over Redwall and the surrounding countryside over the last few seasons was about to be shattered!

On the Western Shores of the Sea, Fardred the Just peered out of his forge window. The once great badger's back was bent with the weight of many, many seasons, and his once-keen sight was gone completely, but his mind and ears were still as sharp as ever. A knock sounded on the door. Fardred heard the familiar stump of Major Bordin's peg-leg and called, "Come on in, Major." the old hare stepped in, a look of surprise on his face, "How did you know it was me, Lord?" he asked incredulously. "That wooden leg of yours makes an awful racket, Major. I can hear you from halfway down the corridor." Bordin blinked a couple of times and then shook his head. "Ahem, well, sire, there was a disturbance in the Mess."
"Oh? what happened?"
"Erm... well, I don't rightly know, wot. One of our new recruits, Holly Windpaw, beat up our current boxing champ, Ordin." Fardred was the one who blinked in amazement. "Wait, Holly Windpaw? Old Falin Windpaw's granddaughter? That little slip of a haremaid?"
Bordin nodded, "That 'little slip of a haremaid' easily boxed Ordin's ears, knocked out old Colonel George and gave Cooky a flippin' black eye, wot!" There was a commotion in the hall. Three burly hares carried a struggling haremaid in to the chamber. "Leggo of me y' great lumps! Unpaw me, I say! Ooh, when I get free, I'll biff y' so hard y' won't wake up for weeks, wot! I'll raise so many lumps on yore heads, yore own mamas ain't gonna know ya! Leggo!" Following behind, came Ordin, a big, strong beast almost twice the size of the maid, with his eye already beginning to swell shut. Bordin signaled to the hares restraining the maid, who dropped her in an ungainly heap on the floor and beat a hasty retreat. Holly, for that was who the haremaid was, shook her paw after them, "Villains! Toad-faces! Bally cads!"
"Stand up straight, miss! Come to attention immediately!" Fardred called. Holly did so right away, but couldn't stop her whiskers from quivering with anger. The Badger Lord nodded to the Major, who took over. "What is the meaning of this, Holly? Eh? Come on, now, sing out!"
Holly lifted her chin a little in defiance. "Ordin called m' friend a name, sah! Called him crippled, sah! So I knocked him, sah!" Fardred came closer and asked softly, "Which friend might that be, Holly?" The haremaid turned mournful eyes upon the blind badger lord, "That would be Kian Oldrid, sire." Kian Oldrid was a shy young hare lad whose left foot-paw had been twisted since birth, resulting in an inability to walk and run normally for the lad. Fardred frowned, he hated to hear of others being treated unfairly. He turned to Ordin. "Is this true?" The burly hare narrowed his eyes, in truth, he was a bully and teased those younger than him mercilessly, especially Kian. This was the first time that Ordin had been caught at it, so he faked a sincere apology, "Yes, sire, I'm sorry, it was wrong of me to do so, please forgive me." Fardred nodded, "Fine, your punishment is two months probation." Major, you and Ordin leave please." they did so, and Fardred turned to Holly, "Holly, I have a request for you. I need to young hares to go on a mission to find my successor, you and Kian are the ones I want for the job.

Chapter One
Redwall

Redwall abbey shone pink in the early morning sunshine. An old mouse poked her head out of her window. The mouse's name was Leila, the abbess of Redwall, though she did not look it. The somber green of a her habit was stained in multiple places with black ink. An avid writer, Leila was rarely seen without her small notebook and a a pen and ink. Small square spectacles perched on the end of her nose almost hid the mischievous glint in her pale blue eye. Abbess Leila hurried down into the grounds and into the orchard. She was passed by a group of Dibbuns (the Abbeybabes). Leila scooped up a shrewbabe named Dina. The babe twitched her nose at the Abbess in indignation. "It'th not nithe to gwab a yittle Dibbun yike dat, marm!" she lisped.
Leila pretended to scowl fiercely at Dina. "Why aren't you in bed naughtybeast? I should skelp your tail!"
 Dina's best friend, a mischievous molebabe by the name of Darby nearly fell over with chuckles, "hurrhurrhurr! you'm skelp dat Dina roight foine Muvver Abbess! She'm bees a likkle razcalar!"
 The Abbess turned her 'stern' stare on him, speaking mole dialect as well. "Oi'll skelp you'ms tail roight after Miz Dina, Darby. You bees an even gurter razcalar then her!" Dina rolled her eyes. "You won't skelp us's tail 'cus we be's only h'infant Dibbuns!" The Abbess smiled, set Dina down and took her and Darby's paws, "you're right, come on breakfast is soon!" The three wandered across the lawn and in to breakfast.

Chapter Two
Enemy Encampment

Deep in Mossflower Woods, Maddox's troops were making camp, oblivious to the shadowy figure crouched high in the tree-tops The beast was an otter by the name of Falaon Darkmoon. He was a young otter with shiny black fur. He was garbed in a simple, dark red tunic and a warm black cloak. Falaon held a bow in his left paw and a quiver of arrows an his back. The otter watched the vermin for a time then leaped away from tree to tree, as skillfully as a squirrel. He finally reached his destination, a small hut of woven willow branches in a tall hemlock. Seated outside the hut were his best friends, a young squirrelmaid and a young hare from Salamandastron who was new to the group.  She looked up huffily when Falaon dropped to the branch in front of her. She grumbled. "Well, what did y' learn?"
"They have captives which we're gonna free."

Chapter 3
A Fight to the Death

Maddox was in a foul mood. His troops were restless and becoming unruly. they needed something to amuse them. The black ferret turned to his three nearly-constant companions, Velita, a vixen soothsayer/healer,  Bloodfur, a large weasel with red-tinged brown fur, and Maddox's wife, Safiyah "We need to give them something to amuse them." Maddox stated. Bloodfur nodded, "Aye, Cap'n, I was thinking the same thing, but what?" The captain stroked his chin. "how many oarslaves survived the crash?"
"Only six, sir, the stripe dog, the mouse maid , the squirrel, that old hedgehog, and those annoying rabbets." Sailyn replied. An indignant gasp rang out from where the captives were tied. "Rabbits?! I'm no RABBIT! For the love of celery, I'm a hare!"
"Aw, shuddup, you!" the guard, a stoat named Stoneskull, grumbled. The haremaid, who had spoken, rolled her eyes and muttered "Shut up yourself, Rockhead, wot! Rabbit? I don't even LOOK like a flippin' rabbit!" the mouse maid, Hanita, chuckled softly.
Maddox's evil features curved into a grin. "I know how to amuse the troops." The ferret beckoned to Stoneskull, "You there, untie the squirrel and bring him here." the stoat did so and the lad was dragged up before the ferret captain. He (the squirrel) was about seventeen seasons old, with red-gold fur, a thick fluffy tail and brown eyes. His left ear was notched and there was a scar on his left cheek, his arms were strong after four seasons of rowing. Maddox paced around the squirrel, who stood stiffly and stared straight ahead. "What's your name, boy?" the ferret asked
"Darien Raptor, Cap'n."
"Can you fight?" Maddox asked. The young squirrel looked him straight in the eyes, undaunted, "What's it to you?" Maddox narrowed his eyes. "Because it might just save your life tomorrow afternoon. Tie him up again, Stoneskull." The squirrel was roughly shoved into his former position and tied up.
Night fell, the captives shifted uncomfortably, trying to sleep. their guards were snoring within minutes. Hanita turned to Darien. "What did he mean, fighting could save your life tomorrow afternoon?" The squirrel shrugged "I dunno. You should get some sleep." The mousemaid leaned her head on his shoulder and was sleeping in minutes. Holly, the haremaid, looked at him sideways. "You're lying, aren't you, wot?" Darien nodded solemnly. "Aye." A strange voice answered him, "Smart move, that, no use frightening her." Holly looked about wildly, "Who said that?!" the voice answered her promptly, "Shush! Keep quiet, will ya?! By the way, I'm Rilliana, this is Falaon." A  squirrelmaid dropped from the tree above and landed on all fours, an otter came after her. The she pulled out a knife and quickly cut their bonds and the otter picked up Sage and carried her away as the squirrelmaid hurried the rest of the former slaves away. They had reached the edge of the camp when the boy hare stepped on a stick, the cracking noise of it breaking seemed deafening. Stone skull leaped up, shouting, "The prisoners! they're esca--!" An arrow silenced him forever, but it was too late, vermin leaped up and charged. "Run!" shouted the squirrelmaid, shoving Darien. They took off, the vermin close behind, when Gurthorn, the old hedgehog, pulled out of line and threw himself at the approaching evil beasts, yelling, "Run, young'uns! I'll hold them off! Run and don't stop 'til you're faraway!" The courageous hedgehog knocked down the front runners, his sharp spikes piercing their fur in numerous places. A spear stuck itself in Gurthorn's side and he stumbled and fell. The vermin threw themselves upon him and he disappeared. The young beasts thought he was gone when he reared up, shaking off his foes and pulling the spear out of his body and skewering several foebeasts, roaring, "Yuuuuuuurrrrrrrayyyyyyyyy! Come to meet me, ye villainous cowards! This hedgehog's a-sendin' ye to Hellgates! Yuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrraaaaayyyyyyyyyyy! Ye can tell the Devil  that Gurthorn sent ye! Yuurraayy!" He turned to his young friends, shouting, " Run, young'uns! Git to Redwall!" He turned back to the fight, yelling his battle cry, spear stabbing wildly, vermin screaming in pain. The young ones ran on, they sound of battle growing fainter, until they stopped abruptly. Darien bowed his head, "So passes Gurthorn, hedgehog warrior." Celia wiped her eyes. "He was a brave-beast. Hares from Salamandastron have a special word for warriors like him, I can't remember it, though." Corin, the hare lad spoke for the first time, "Perilous. Gurthorn was a perilous beast and no mistake, wot." Holly nodded. "Aye, he was."
"Come on, we have to save the talk for later, we need to concentrate on getting to Redwall and tell them there is a vermin horde basically in their backyard."

[AnnaofRedwall]

Chapter 4
The Sword bearer

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Celia and her friends pressed on. A full day's march passed and they saw the roof over the treetops. Fal grinned," there it is!" Corin leapt for joy, "That's it?! Redflippin'wall!? Great! I'm STARVING!!!!!
The Redwallers were going about their daily chores in the peaceful Abbey, when the Old Sister Ava, the current Librarian cum Recorder heard a loud, booming knock from where she was reading in the Orchard. Skipper Rocco strode past. "Go see who that is, Skip." She muttered, not looking up. "Yes'm." he said, unbolting the gate and pulling it open. Standing outside were a motley crew of young-beasts, Two young squirrels, two hares, a young badger, a young otter and a little mousemaid with a bandage on her left foot-paw. "Hello there. Do you come in peace to Redwall?" Rocco asked. The otter nodded stiffly, "Aye, but not the vermin who're following us." Rocco pulled the gate open the rest of the ways, "Come on in." Abbess Leila saw them from across the lawns and hurried over. "Skipper, what is this all about?" she asked. "They say they know of a vermin horde headed this way.  The old mouse turned to the young beasts, "Is this true?" The otter nodded again. "Then you better come in. Leila stared to lead them to Cavern Hole when the mousemaid collapsed with a cry. Ariana, a novice ottermaid, hurried over almost before she hit the ground. "We should get her to the Infirmary, Mother." Ariana said. Skipper Rocco picked the mousemaid up and carried her to the Infirmary, the others following close behind. Ariana fell in step with Falaon. "I'm Ariana, what do they call you?" "Falaon." "What happened to her?" "She fell and twisted her ankle." Ariana nodded "I see." Sister Bluet, the hedgehog infirmary sister, undid the wrapping on Sage's ankle. "It's not broken, but it is badly sprained." The sister muttered. While she was wrapping it, a burly hedgehog came in. "Mother Abbess, the Dibbuns are pestering me to death with their asking when the feast is." Corin grinned, "A feast! Can we go?" The Abbess smiled, "I don't think I've ever heard of a hare that DOESN'T want to go to a feast. The feast is in the Orchard, it starts at sundown, But first you must tell us about these vermin." The badgermaid spoke first, "My name is Orlanda Scythstripe," she said, touching her unusually curved head-stripe. "I was born on an island far to the west, called Stormford, where my mother and father are the King and Queen. I began to have strange dreams about a giant mountain, so I set off in the sloop I was given for my 16th season-day. I was attacked by pirates and captured. I met Corin and Holly who have agreed to take me to Salamandastron." The story of the group came out bit by bit. At around noon, Fal noticed that Rilliana had fallen asleep. The squirrelmaid stood up and began to walk out in to the hall. the others rose and followed her to the Tapestry of Martin the Warrior. Sister Ava, the recorder fished around for a parchment and charcoal stick and began to write down Rilla's words.

"Redwall's danger will come from the North,
The Wind of Death will blow steadily forth.
Badgermaid must follow the Mountain's Call,
Where the Just must fall.
Child of Snow will bare my blade,
And stop the Shadow's raid.
On the advent of the army of otter and shrew,
Is the day a Ferret will rue.
A hedgehog's revenge will be the horde's bane,
And a mousemaid the Abbey will reign."

Rilla shook her head and blinked a few times. "Who brought me over here? If this is a joke, it's not funny." Leila patted her shoulder. "Not a joke, child." She turned her around. "Tell me, have you ever seen this mouse before?" Rilla moved closer to the tapestry and stroked the elaborate embroidery. "Aye, many times, in my dreams." She murmured. The squirrelmaid glanced up at the magnificent sword that hung on two wall-spikes above the tapestry. "And he's always telling me to 'bear his blade'. That blade." Skipper Rocco reached up and took the sword down, handing it to Rilla. It was a simple warriors weapon, nothing fancy. A straight, double-edged blade with a blood tract as straight as a die. The black-bound cross-hilt was surmounted with a round, ruby red stone. "They say this blade was forged by a Badger Lord from the metal of a falling star." The otter said. Rilla took it wordlessly and stepped back, whirling the sword in a rhythmical figure-eight motion. The still air thrummed with it's movement. Rilla's eyes were half-closed in concentration. Over the head, 'round the footpaws, and back again. She took a hop-skip towards a candle-stick, swinging the sword and neatly halving the candle. The squirrelmaid let the force of the blade spin her around and lunged at Corin, swiftly slicing the mushroom pasty in his paw. Then she swung around, leaping at Fal, "Redwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall!" Rilla cut his bowstring in half with a swift flick of the blade and sheathed it just as suddenly. "Made from the metal of a falling star, eh? Well, I believe it! 'Tis a wonderful blade." Fal nodded wordlessly. "Thanks for leaving all my limbs intact, Rilla." The maid shrugged. "No problem."  
"Well, that's all said and done." said Holly, "Can we eat now?"

Chapter 5
Plans and a Dream

Deathshadow's horde was uneasy, their captain had been very, very angry about the escape of the prisoners. He had ruthlessly killed the weasel who had been on guard and then stormed to his pavilion to think. A few hours passed with no sign of their leader and the horde began to relax and go about with their daily duties. Suddenly, the entrance curtain to the Pavilion flew open and out strode Deathshadow himself. The former pirate captain had shed his seafaring garb and was now arrayed in a far more frightening garments. He wore a flaxen kilt the color of  blood, held up by a black snake-skin belt with a gold buckle. A knee-length cape of the same red billowed out behind Maddox, giving the impression that sadness and misery and blood trailed in his wake. A bone-studded, braided circlet of white leather rested on his brow, and a bone earring glinted in his left ear. "Tattear! Cullney! Come here!" he called. A scrawny rat with shredded ears and a dull grey fox hurried over, touching their left ears (or what was left of them) in a sign of respect, "Yuss, Cup'n?" said Cullney the fox. "I want you two to go around Mossflower and gather recruits, rats, stoats, whatever, and bring them here. Destroy and burn whatever dwellings they have so they'll have no choice but to come and join the horde."
"Yuss, Cup'n, sir." the rat and the fox hurried off. Deathshadow turned to Bloodfur, "Fetch me my trident." The weasel retrieved the triple-pronged weapon from the tent and presented it to his master. The trident was as tall as Maddox, with blades of black iron and a hardwood staff. Each of the razor-sharp prongs were studded with cruel barbs. It was a weapon of lethal beauty. The ferret strode back to the tent, calling over his shoulder, "Bloodfur, have the best scouts start out towards the Southeast and Mossflower. Velita, come with me." The interior of the blood red pavilion was lit by a sea coal fire that cast eerie reflections on the canvas walls. Maddox sat down in his wooden chair and regarded the vixen. Her reddish fur was almost completely silvered with age. she wore a tattered red and blue dress. Carved bone earrings were in her ears and almost uncountable gold and silver, gemstone studded bangles adorned her wrists, ankles and neck. A leather pouch was attached to her belt. "Tell me my-" "Future?" Velita interrupted him. Maddox looked slightly flustered, but regained his composure quickly. "Fortune, I was going to say fortune." Velita rolled her eyes "Of course you were." Just then, Safiyah, Maddox's wife, walked in. Safiyah was small and delicate, with pale grey face and midsection and a jet black mask, legs and tail. She wore a gold embroidered, royal purple cloak that swept out behind her, a lavender colored skirt, a gold chain-belt that held the scabbards of her slim throwing knives, and a snake shaped bracelet on her left paw. Maddox almost leapt up in a tirade, but his wife calmly stared him down. "The scouts report a road headed in the direction of Redwall." The warlord smiled. "Good."


The feast, like all Redwall feasts, was magnificent. The tables that had been set up in the Orchards groaned with the weight of all the food. There were salads and cheeses and cakes and pies uncountable