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The Unlikeliest

Started by The Skarzs, February 02, 2019, 09:49:30 PM

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The Skarzs

It's such a hare-ish name.
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

The Skarzs

Sorry for the double post. Here is Chapter Eight.

Chapter Eight
Chapter Eight

     Ravax sat alone in the dark, her back pressed up against the cold stone. The Long Patrol guard had left and been replaced by one of the Redwallers just outside the door. From what she had seen before they had closed the door it was a vole. That was several hours ago. Her eyelids felt heavy, though she had no idea what time it was anymore. The dark was making it more difficult to stay alert.
     She could hear the vole whistling again; he must have been having trouble staying awake too. Ravax felt her way to the door and leaned in close to listen through the thick wood. He was pacing. The whistling got louder and softer as he moved closer and farther from the door.
     Ravax gripped the doorknob and hesitated. It might be the only chance she was going to get, but the building was full of hares and woodlanders. She might be able to overpower the one outside the door, but not all of them. She drew back without opening the door and her leg brushed up against a barrel.
     If Ah stay Ah'm dead anyway, she thought, reaching down and feeling around for anything that could be used as a weapon. Her paws ran across the warped wood of empty barrels and metal rings until her arm brushed against a rough edge. A broken barrel. She found a piece of wood about the size of her forearm and snuck back to the door. The vole was still pacing.
     Ravax gripped the board and flung the door open. The vole jumped and turned around, but before he could cry out the board struck him on the side of the head. He collapsed in a silent heap beside his lantern. Ravax gripped the board with shaking paws and pulled it close to her chest as she looked down at the unconscious creature. She hesitated for a moment, and then grabbed the dagger from his limp paw, abandoning the board as she ran for the stairs.
     Slowing down she carefully made her way up the stairs so as not to make too much noise on the old, creaking wood. It was completely dark at the top except for the thin sliver of pale white light seeping in from under the door that lead to the kitchen. To her surprise it was completely quiet. She opened the door a crack and peered through.
     The room was empty, shafts of moonlight washing over the countertops, bowls and cooking utensils. Rows of painted jars were lined on a shelf to her left. She went over to them and removed the lid on one of them;  it was full of chestnuts. She took one out and popped it in her mouth. Her eyes went wide as she found it was sweet, covered in crystallized honey. She looked around the rest of the room. It was such a big space just for cooking. She doubted that any of the creatures there had ever truly felt hunger, living in a place where food was in steady supply so much so that they could afford to keep a jar of sweets next to the salt and flower as if it were a regular ingredient.
     Ravax sucked in a breath. Burian would get to stay, while she had to go back out there where she never knew where her next meal was coming from. She was so tired of constantly running from everything. . . The ferret shook her head. She couldn't stay there. She needed to get going before she was caught.
     She found a sack shoved under a table that was half-full of potatoes. She dumped most of them out and then proceed to fill the sack with whatever she could find. Three apples from a bowl of fruit, two loaves of bread that were sitting out on the counter, the entire contents of a bowl of mushrooms, and four oat cakes from a tray. She looked at the jar of chestnuts longingly and hesitated for a moment but moved away without taking any. She knew that if she was going to make the food she had last she could only take the essentials. With that she hefted the sack over her shoulder and headed for the door.
     The door opened up into a empty courtyard. She could see a garden to her right and the silhouettes of trees farther off  to her left. The grounds were empty and quiet, but, looking up at the wall top, she could see the silhouettes of hares and other abbey beasts. Ravax took a deep breath and, keeping to the shadows, she ran for the orchard. Once under the cover of the trees, she slowed her pace and headed for the east wall.
     Ravax could see a hole in the dark wall, vaguely illuminated by the crescent moon. She pressed herself against the wall and snuck along it toward the gate, stopping every so often to check she was still undetected. After what seemed like eternity, the ferret slipped around the corner into the arch of the gateway. She breathed a sigh of relief before waiting once again to make sure she was safe, and carefully experimented with the gate latch.
     Wiggling it back and forth, she slid it out quietly save for a soft grinding noise and a bump as it came all the way out. Now that was over, she wrapped her paw around the handle and pulled gently. The old hinges creaked horribly, and Ravax stopped and stood still as a statue, her heart pounding in her ears like war drums, and waited for somebeast to notice. But, there appeared to be no disturbance from the Redwallers, and she continued slowly pulling the door open. Thankfully, after the first little ways, the gate stopped squeaking, and Ravax slipped out as soon as there was enough room to fit her small body.
     Carefully closing it behind her, Ravax could hardly contain herself from shaking as she stepped away from the wall, almost letting herself be seen by a creature on the wall above. She hugged the wall like a shadow and darted into the forest as soon as the cover was near enough.
   She suddenly felt her feet knocked out from underneath her and the breath leave her lungs as she hit the ground. Her vision filled with stars and when her head cleared she was looking up at Cal's sneering face.
     "Ya seem a bit lost," he chuckled.
     "Shouldn't we, you know. . . Jarral said to kill anyone who came out o' tha abbey," a rat standing behind Cal said.
     "Does she look like a woodlander t'yew?" Cal snapped "Sides, Jarral will want t' see this one."
     Cal hauled Ravax to her feet as she clutched her chest and gasped for air.
     "Don't try anythin'," Cal hissed in her ear as he half-pushed, half-dragged her along.
     "No, no, not again," Ravax croaked, stumbling as her vision blinked in and out.
     Cal and the rat escorted Ravax swiftly around the abbey, and the ferret could glimpse the shapes of many other vermin as they passed. Jarral had come to Redwall, she realized.
     Ravax began to get her breath back as they neared the camp and began to kick and struggle.
     "Ah'm no' going back there!" she cried, but promptly stopped struggling when she felt the sharp prick of a knife on her back.
     "Behave yerself or I'll stick ya," Cal said.
     They passed through the camp, the other vermin barely giving them a second glance. They were used to seeing this sort of thing by now. Then Ravax saw Rurrock and Torev, bound and under guard. Rurrock raised his eyes, and recognized the ferret in the firelight.
     "You- you were right. . . but it's too late," he said hoarsely, hanging his head.
     Ravax wrestled free of Cal's grip and looked down at Rurrock. "Yew should 'ave thought o' that before treatin' meh like last year's cabbage!" she spat.
     "You know this otter? I should 'ave known you would be friends with woodlanders. You always were soft," Cal scoffed, as he made another grab at her.
     "He ain't mah friend, mudbrain," Ravax snapped as she moved out of reach. She gave Rurrock a sharp kick in the stomach, and he doubled over. Torev put his bound paws on his shoulder and looked up at Ravax with sad eyes, but she couldn't meet his gaze.
     "They treated meh like dirt an' that's what they are." She turned to Cal. "Ah want t'see Jarral."
     "I was bringin' ya to 'im already." The fox wrinkled his snout. "I thought you hated 'im."
     "Just let meh talk to 'im." With that, the ferret turned her back on the two otters and headed toward the main tent.
     "Fine, but there's no runnin' away," Cal said with a shrug, following after.
     As they approached Jarral's tent Urgat stepped forward, arms crossed in front of his chest.
     "Where do y' think you two are goin'," he asked, looking down his nose at Cal.
     Cal smirked. "Ya remember Ravax, dontcha Urgat?"
     Urgat squinted at Cal, then eyed Ravax suspiciously.
     "Ah need ta talk ta Jarral," Ravax demanded, looking up defiantly at the large stoat. "Ah can 'elp 'im."
     He continued looking at her for a moment and then nodded.
     "Yeh, he'll want ta see you. But not you." Urgat glared at Cal. The fox scowled and walked off in a huff. Urgat pulled the tent flap back and stepped inside, grabbing Ravax by the arm and pulling her in after him. "My lord, I got somebeast who wants ta see you."
     Jarral looked up from his desk and his eyes widened when he saw Ravax. "You!" He started up, knocking over his inkwell, spilling the black liquid across the map he had been looking over. Then his face hardened and a spark burned behind his eyes. He stepped out from behind his desk and Ravax seemed to shrink.
     Jessela looked up from the papers she was reading and looked from Jarral to Ravax, "Who's this?" she asked. Jarral stopped and looked back at his sister, and the fire died in his eyes.
     He looked back at Ravax "What are you doing here?" he asked coldly.
   Ravax opened her mouth and then stopped and looked at the ground. "You were right." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "Yew were right all along, Ah was young an' foolish, an' Ah never should 'ave trusted them. . ." Ravax bit her lip as her vision blurred, and she fought back tears.
   "Oh sweetheart, what happened?" Jessela said, moving forward before Jarral could do or say anything. Ravax sucked in her breath and Jessela placed a comforting paw on Ravax's shoulder. She then looked up at Urgat and mouthed the word "leave." He hesitated for a moment before exiting the tent.
   Ravax looked up at Jessela and shuddered "Ah was in Redwall, it was awful. . . There was an otter, Ah thought Ah could trust 'im, but 'e was just usin' meh. He gave meh up to the long patrol the first chance 'e got."
     "Oh, it's fine, you're safe now," Jessela soothed, leading Ravax over to the chair. Ravax glanced at Jarral hesitantly with tear-stained eyes. Jarral's frown deepened. "What's your name?" Jessela asked.
     "She is not welcome here," Jarral spat.
     "And why not? Why are you being so rude to the poor child?" Jessela said turning on him.
     "She is a good for nothing traitor. She deserves to die for what she's done, not get cuddled by you," Jarral snapped. Ravax shrunk in her chair and Jessela looked back at her.
     "And what did she do?" Jessela asked.
     Jarral strode over to stand over Ravax, and she flinched. "Tell her," he said, grabbing the back of the chair and leaning close. "Tell her how I took you under my wing, promised you the world if you would just reach for it. Tell her how after everything I did for you, you betrayed me. Tell her about all the lives that were lost because of your foolish actions. Because of you it took me an extra five years to rebuild the horde to full strength. That is five long, cold winters wandering in the wilderness without a home."
     Ravax slid out of the chair and fell to her knees clutching her head. "Please stop, Ah'm sorry! Ah'm sorry!" she cried.
     "Why did you come back?" Jarral shouted.
     "Ah'm not askin' to be your apprentice again. . . Ah just want to be a part o' this. Ah'll do anythin' you ask, just please do no' send meh away," Ravax begged. Jessela pulled Ravax to her feet and looked her in the eyes.
     "No one is sending you away," she said firmly. "You can help us build this home. You were inside the abbey. How big are the Redwallers' forces?"
     Ravax rubbed her nose with the back of her paw. "Ah. . . Ah couldn't really tell, they locked meh in the cellars an' Ah didn't really see much o' the abbey."
     "So how did you escape?" Jarral asked, looking at her with new interest.
     "Ah left out the east gate. With any luck it should still be unlocked," Ravax said, looking up hopefully at him.
     Jarral's face lit up "Ravax, you may have just managed to do something right for once."

   The next hour was long and grueling. Jarral asked question after question, interrogating Ravax until she was exhausted. When Jarral was finally satisfied he left the tent, barely even giving Ravax a second glance. Ravax slumped forward in the chair and stared blearily at the floor. Jessela stepped forward and placed a paw on her shoulder. Ravax looked up and blinked away tears.
   "What's wrong?" Jessela said softly.
   Ravax took a deep shaky breath. "Ah d' no know. . . well Ah do. . . Ah just. . . Why do Ah keep doing this? Ah keep trusting the wrong people an' they always turn on meh."
   "Sometimes that is how things go," Jessela sighed. "Sometimes you have to get rid of the things in your life that are holding you back. That includes this otter of yours."
   Ravax frowned, hot tears filling her eyes. "He was just using meh. . ." she choked on her words, unable to continue as she stifled a sob.
   "It's alright dear. It's alright to cry. Sometimes life deals us more pain than our hearts can hold, and we have to let it out." Jessela knelt down in front of Ravax and cupped her cheek in her paw, gently wiping away a tear with her claw. Ravax choked again and sobbed, leaning forward to bury her face in Jessela's shoulder. Jessela pulled her close and let her cry until her breathing became more even and her shoulders stopped shaking. Jessela pulled Ravax back to look at her. Ravax wiped tears from her face with the back of her arm.
   "You can do this, the only person in this world who can change your life for the better is you, and you can only do that if you get rid of everything holding you back."
   "Yew mean. . .?" Ravax faltered and trailed off.
   "You know what I mean," Jessela said, drawing a dagger from her belt and placing it firmly in Ravax's paws. "You will need this."
   Ravax looked at the dagger and then back up at Jessela, her face still tear-stained, but a new resolve gleamed in her eyes.

     Restonor looked down at the vermin camp for what seemed like the hundredth time, as if he could make them all go away with his glare. The aging mouse set his jaw as he turned away from the wall. There was nothing he could do, at the moment. It was well past midnight, and neither side had moved a whisker against each other. They were waiting.
     And he hated waiting.
     "Oh, for my younger days," he said softly, remembering a time when he might have boldly confronted the enemy without a second thought of the risks with the very sword he had sheathed at his waist. Restonor felt a long scar running along the nape of his neck with a paw. At the same time, though, he admonished himself on some of his brash decisions.
     He sighed and walked down from the wall, watching a lantern come toward him as he descended the stairs.
"Father Abbot."
     "Restonor." Abbot Firrin nodded back to the warrior. "How does it look out there?"
     "Not good." The other shook his head. "If we could get word out to Salamandastron we might have a chance, but that weasel has eyes watching us at every moment."
     "What are we to do?" Firrin asked, knowing Restonor could not answer. "They need our answer tomorrow."
     "You haven't made a decision?"
     "How can I? If we surrender we give up Redwall and all it stands for, and place all our lives in danger. If we decide to fight we risk the lives of countless creatures outside our walls, as well as our own." A tear glimmered in the lantern light as it fell from Firrin's eye.
     Restonor put a paw on the squirrel's shoulder. "Don't despair, my friend. Perhaps Martin can guide us."
     The two walked on in silence, then the Abbot turned to Restonor. "Where are we going, anyway?"
     "Checking the gates."
     "I thought I had them ordered locked almost immediately after the vermin arrived."
     Restonor shrugged. "No harm checking them again, is there? Besides, 'tis better than waiting on the wall for dawn. I'm a poor claw twiddler."
     The two friends walked around the perimeter of the wall, conversing in low tones as they checked the west and south wall gates, both securely locked and bolted.
     "Two more," said Restonor. "You go get some rest, Father."
     "Very well," said Firrin, stopping and letting the warrior walk on. "Have a peaceful night."
     He was turning around when a voice called out, and a figure ran toward him.
     "Father Abbot! Restonor! Have you seen Ravax?"
     "The ferret?" Firrin looked at Burian uneasily. "I thought she was still in the-"
     "She's gone! She knocked out the vole who was watching the door, and now she's gone!"
     "I knew she wasn't to be trusted," started Firrin, when Restonor yelled out from the gate, and the two spun around In shock.
     "Attack! Attack! Vermin are in the abbey!"
     "What in- Abbot, go!" shouted Burian as he ran toward the east wall gate, where Restonor could vaguely be seen struggling against other forms. Burian felt his side for the sword that was not there, and he could not help but curse that it was taken away. Instead, he drew his kukri and leapt to the battle.
   
   Ravax tightened her grip on her dagger, palms sweaty and breaths quick, her heart racing in her chest, while Urgat's shadow loomed over her. The sound of shouts rang out from just inside the walls as Jarral's small preliminary force pressed through the east gate. Jarral stood in the back calling out commands. Cal glanced back at Ravax from where he stood next to Jarral, the moon glinting off his curved blade and a smirk on his face. It seemed some Redwallers were holding them back, if barely. Finally, the force broke through the gate, and Ravax was pushed through the gate in a rush as the vermin around her surged forward.
   A group of vermin pursued a single mouse, pushing him backward as he fought with his flashing blade. Finally, he was backed up against the wall, not far from the gate, and a spear took him through the shoulder. Ravax watched as he slumped to the ground, and was left to bleed.
   Urgat pushed her from behind. "Get goin'!"
   Ravax went swiftly, trying not to look at the warrior mouse as Urgat walked her past him. She heard a deep growl from the mouse and took a quick glance at him.
   Restonor was bleeding heavily from several wounds, but it did not stop him from staring at her with fire in his eyes. He did not speak a word, but the look chilled Ravax as she rushed past him.
   Jarral's voice raised once again. "Hares! On the wall, intercept them before they can cut us off!"
   "Close that wall gate before more can come in, wot!"
   The hairs on Ravax's neck rose as Lieutenant Tebian also shouted, and she turned to see three hares sprinting toward her. The ferret ducked aside and tried to run, but Urgat caught her by the tail. "You liddle sneak, get-"
   Ravax wildly kicked at the stoat, catching him some hefty blows to the face, gut, and shin. He fell down, letting her go, and she shot off like an arrow toward the orchard. Breathing hard, she took refuge in the shadows of the fruit trees as the sounds of battle rang out behind her and the beltower began to let out a peeling cry of alarm, the beating of her heart just as loud in her own ears.
   A dark shadow swept up beside her, and tackled her to the ground. "Ravax!"
   Ravax recognised his voice, but she drew her knife and cut at him before he could overpower her completely. The keen edge split through Burian's sleeve and into his arm, but he grabbed her wrist before she could strike again, twisting the knife from her grasp. With one swift movement, Ravax wiggled free from Burian's grasp, and drew his kukri from his belt. Burian stood up and spun around to the deadly point of his own weapon poised inches from his throat.
   The two stood still, staring at each others' silhouettes, listening to their own heavy breathing.
   "Why?" Burian managed to say. "Why would you do this?"
   "Why?" Ravax growled back. "Why'd yew give meh up to the Redwallers? Why'd the otter clan try to kill meh? Why has every woodlander Ah have ever met tried to kill meh? That's why," she said, the dagger pressing closer to his throat.
   Burian's blood boiled. "Give you up to them? I wanted you let go!"
   "That's not what yew told the hares," she interrupted.
   "The hares?"
   "Yes, the bloody hares! Yew let them take meh to th' abbey an' lock meh up just to protect yewr useless hide."
   "They would've killed you rather than let you go! They can't look at me, now. . . None of 'em can! Not after all I said to convince 'em t'have you released!"
   Ravax faltered, and the kukri moved back an inch. "Yew convinced them to let meh go. . .?"
   "And now look!" continued Burian, pointing at the chaos near the main gate. "Even if we make it through this alive, I'll be kicked out o' the abbey for trusting you. And I don't know if I'd be able t' stop the hares from killing you again."
   Ravax dropped the weapon at her side and took a step back. "Yew. . . Yew need to leave. The south gate ain't bein' watched."
   Burian looked at Ravax, uncertainty creeping over his anger. However, he did not have enough time to reply before the bulky form of Urgat emerged. "Ravax, you traitor, I knew you was soft!" He threw a clumsy punch at Burian, who jumped back just in time. "I'm comin' after you as soon as I take care o' this stoopid waterdog!"
   This time, he tackled Burian, who was able to throw him off with a kick from both feet, sending him crashing deeper into the trees. Then Burian was after him with a roar, disappearing into the dark with the sounds of their struggle fading with them.
   Ravax turned and ran, the bell still tolling overhead as cries rang out from the wall top. The gate wasn't far. Ravax stopped and dropped down into the shadows. She could see the main gate, a battle raging between Jarral's forces and the Salamandastron hares. They had backed themselves against the gate, fighting for all they were worth to hold the vermin back from opening the gate. One was already down, and four remained. The two that had gone to the small gate were also occupied with some of the vermin as they came to aid their comrades. Jarral could be seen as a silhouette in the darkness, and the fox Cal stood beside him as he intently watched the fight go on.
   As Ravax looked at Jarral, she noticed a form moving slowly towards him. The glint of steel flickered from the blade he carried, and as he got closer, he began running.
   "Jarral!" Restonor yelled.
[close]
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

The Grey Coincidence




Quote from: Faiyloe on March 08, 2019, 01:43:33 AM


P.S. I also really like Tebian's name XD. I am also glad you like Amerun, him and his mom are two of my favorite brain children XD



Tsk tsk, a parent shouldn't pick favourites.


*Barely holding onto cliff* Well... That escalated quickly.
Ravax escaped! I didn't expect that- didn't expect that at all (but that's a good thing) and honestly her escaping seemed more and more unlikely with each passing word but she managed. Congratulations to her, she managed to escape. I'm glad she didn't murder Burian (I'm fifty-fifty on him surviving the story, but it seems early) and would have let him get away if not for Urgat (who has finally done something worth remembering- tackle Burian... Although I think I'll give this fight to big brows.
I have a feeling Ravax might save Jarral at this point (because that would cement her on team vermin... Although she's not exactly a willing participant so I digress, anything could happen at this point-to-point although I think Restonor is unlikely to slay Jarral now (it still feels early-ish but I can admit that if he died now someone else would take over (perhaps with... Lesser intentions...)
I wasn't the biggest Jessela fan to begin with (Iike her dynamic with Amerun and the Jarral twist was very good) but the way she handled Ravax was very sweet- almost motherly (and I should consider that she did raise Amerun, freakish though he may be).
I eagerly await your next chapter.
Update soon
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

Faiyloe

Thanks for the feedback. I am not going to say whether your predictions are right or not but I will say that this fanfiction is 10 chapters in all (something you would know if it was a printed book so I don't feel it is spoilery telling you that.) We are planning a prequel and a sequel so there is that, but there are no guarantees of when those will be written. They are currently in the brainstorming stage XD XP.
I am back... sort of... maybe... Hi?

The Grey Coincidence

It's not a spoiler... But it changes things (I don't know why I expect everything to be longer than it is...)
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

The Skarzs

Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine

   Restonor charged at the small weasel he knew to be the horde leader, the pain of his wounds forgotten as his rage for Jarral's treachery enveloped him. "Jarral!" he yelled.
   "My lord, look out!" cried Cal.
   Jarral turned to see the old warrior coming toward him, and he ducked just in time. Martin's blade split the air where Jarral's neck had been, but cut Cal down as if he was not even there.
   The rush of adrenaline left Restonor as he realized he had killed the wrong creature. He looked up at the battle at the gate, then back down at Jarral. "You-" he said, raising his weapon one more time, but a stab of pain rushed through him like lightning, and he fell back, his vision spinning from loss of blood. The sword of Martin slipped from his paws as he collapsed.
   Jarral looked down at the old mouse, and his eyes landed on the legendary blade of Martin, with its red stone glinting in the moonlight, leading to the black leather-bound handle, and up to the shining steel blade. He was transfixed by it for a moment, a memory from so long ago resurfacing. Jarral raised his own sword and rested the tip of the blade against Restonor's chest.
   "I doubt you remember me, so allow me to help you. Twenty-four years ago, over two hundred innocent men, women, and children were slaughtered in the wake of that blade. Your so-called sacred sword carries the stain of innocent blood."
   "Innocent?" Restonor said through gritted teeth. "I've only u-used it to take the lives of vermin like you." He tried to move but it brought on another bolt of pain, and he gasped on the ground helplessly.
   "And there is your sin," Jarral said. Restonor screamed as Jarral's blade dug into his already wounded shoulder. "A quick death is too good for you. You will feel the pain of every single creature you slaughtered." He twisted the blade in the wound and Restonor let out another scream of agony. "Every mother, father, son, and daughter."
     The bell stopped tolling, and Jarral smiled. Another hare fell to a vermin blade, and the others were getting overwhelmed. Abbey beasts watched in horror from the abbey building, knowing that soon the horde would enter their home.
     "Your precious abbey is falling." Jarral looked down at Restonor. "Everything you love will be destroyed, and in its place a paradise will rise from the ashes. What will cause you more pain? Killing the females, perhaps? Or maybe the babes. So. . . helpless."
     "D-don't!" cried Restonor. "Please! Don't hurt them!"
     "Begging? Did you listen to ours?" yelled Jarral, the light if rage shining in his eyes. "I'll make their screams long, and loud, so loud that you'll hear them after you're dead! You will know pain! You will know how I have felt! You-" Jarral words were cut short, and his eyes went wide as he looked down to find a blade protruding from his stomach. He slipped from the blade and collapsed in a heap. Ravax stood where he had been, breathing hard and trembling, eyes wide, staring in horror at what she had done and Martin's sword clutched in her paws with Jarral's blood dripping down the blade onto her paws.
     Restonor looked at Ravax in utter disbelief. Even if he wanted to say something to the ferret, he couldn't, as he blacked out from pain and blood loss.
     As Ravax stood, Burian approached, a little worse for wear from his fight with Urgat, and stopped a little ways from her. "Ravax," he said. ". . . Is he dead?"
     Ravax slowly lowered the blade and let the point rest on the ground as she stared at the body. "Ah. . . Ah think Ah killed him," she said, choking on her breath.
     Burian went to Jarral's body, turning it over with his foot. The weasel's glazed eyes stared back at him. "Aye. . ." said Burian softly. "You did."
     Ravax dropped Martin's sword and it fell to the ground with a thud. She shook her head and hugged her arms to her chest, shivering. "Ah never killed anythin' before," she muttered.
     "Yeah."
     Burian said nothing more, but put a paw on her shoulder.
     He looked over at the fight for the gate. Some brave young Redwallers had gone to join the hares, and now the tide of the battle was shifting. The side gate had been closed and locked. Redwall would be safe.
     Ravax shuddered, a sob escaping  her chest. "What have Ah done?" She turned and buried her face in Burian's chest as she shook, her body racked with sobs, uncontrolled tears streaming down her face and staining his shirt.
     Burian stood awkwardly holding Ravax, letting her cry. "It. . . ain't easy killing," he said softly. "But you helped save lives."
     "B-but why? He was going to help meh! But he was going to kill. . . Ah just- Ah just want a home!" she sobbed.
     I know the feeling, Burian thought as he held Ravax, hoping to comfort her. He wasn't sure if he should say any more.
     After a little while, Ravax's tears slowed, and her breathing evened out. She pulled away and looked in the direction of the main gate. The fighting had stopped completely, and many other abbeybeasts were coming out to tend to the wounded and dead.
     Abbot Firrin rushed with Lieutenant Tebian toward the fallen Restonor, pushing Burian and Ravax out of the way to get to him. The old mouse was breathing shallowly, and his wounds still oozed blood, but he was alive.
The abbot called some creatures to help carry the warrior away, and Burian watched as he was hurried to the infirmary.
     Ravax shrunk back into the safety of Burian's shadow. "Ah shouldn't be here," she said.
     "Hold on," said Burian.
     Tebian looked at Jarral's dead body, then at Ravax. "Just one more vermin left in the abbey." Tebian drew his sword. "Move aside, Burian."
     The otter placed himself squarely in front of Ravax.
     "I said-"
     "No, Tebian, I ain't movin'," growled Burian. "You decided she'd be let free, and I'm gonna make sure she is."
     "There's only one way the vermin got in, and that's her!" said Tebian as he pointed his sword at Burian's chest. "She betrayed you, boy, and nearly cost us more lives than we already lost."
     "Did you forget what he was gonna do if we didn't surrender?" asked Burian, waving his paw toward Jarral. "Lives woulda been lost one way or another, and Ravax ended it with 'is death."
     The two stood staring each other down in the darkness, unmoving, and resolute. Finally, Tebian put up his sword. "We'll see." With that, he walked away back to his hares.
     As soon as Tebian left, Burian's shoulders drooped, and he looked at his feet with a little bit of shame. But it only lasted a moment before he lifted himself back up and turned to Ravax. "C'mon. Let's find a place to rest."
Ravax looked up at him and took his paw and nodded, unable to speak; she suddenly realized how tired she was.

     The horde watched the main gate of the abbey expectantly, waiting for Jarral's force inside to open it and let them in. It was supposed to be done by now.
     Jessela paced back and forth, never taking her eyes off the oaken gate. Amerun sat on the ground behind her, alternately watching her and the abbey.
     "Whad's going on, ma? He said fifdeen minudes, and dat was almosd an hour ago."
     Jessela stopped pacing and looked up at the red stone walls of the abbey as the sun began to rise. Her face contorted into an ugly grimace and her eyes filled with tears. "They're not coming out."
     "Whad?"
     "She means, they're dead, the whole lot of 'em," came the voice of Mank from behind Jessela and her son. The one-armed ferret glared at the abbey. "They got what was comin' to 'em, goin' into that place. An' we'll all end up like 'em if we don't leave."
     "It looks like you got what you wanted after all," Jessela whispered, unable to tear her eyes away from the abbey.
     "Yeh? Maybe." Mank turned to the horde. "Jarral's dead or captured, though if there's hares in there it's more'n likely 'e's dead. 'Tis th' fate of e'rybeast what comes 'ere. You wanna keep tryin' 'ere, or live the rest o' yore lives?"
     Murmurs and nods followed Mank's words, though there were some vermin who were stubborn.
     "And whaddya think we're gonna do, eh?"
     "Yer past yer prime, Mank."
     "Jarral was way better than ye!"
     Mank peered at the last speaker. "Is that you, Grite?"
     The rat called Grite stood up. "Yeah, it's me."
     "Shoulda known you'd still take Jarral's side after 'elping 'im take over, even when 'e ain't 'ere no more," said Mank. "But who's still alive now, him, or me?"
     Another wave of agreement came, mostly through the newer part of the horde. Mank took advantage of the momentum to rally more support for his ideas.
     "Anybeast who wants t' stay an' die is welcome, but there's plenty o' land out there that ain't 'round Redwall. I say let 'em be. What say ye?"
     "Aye!" came the resounding response.
     "And what about us?"
     "Who?" asked Mank, looking around.
     Jessela pushed her way through the horde, shoving the two otters Rurrock and Torev. "Them."
     Mank looked at them, then shrugged. "Kill 'em, I don't care."
     "Wait!" Jessela said "If you kill them the Abbey would never let you get away, they would hunt you down. There are Long Patrol hares in there too, so not only would you have the abbey after you but you would also have the fire mountain to worry about. However, if you give them over to me, I can make sure the exchange is made. You don't have to deal with the abbey anymore and you are rid of those two." She nodded at the two otters. "You win on both accounts."
     Mank thought about this for a second, then nodded. "Good." The ferret turned to the horde. "Pack everythin'. It's dawn already, an' we wanna get as far from 'ere as we can."
     Jessela grabbed Mank by his empty sleeve before he could move away. Her tear-filled eyes went dark as they bored into him with a malice and intention that couldn't be ignored. "Leave Jarral's tent behind; his things belong to me now," she said.
     The other extricated his sleeve from Jessela's grip. "Have it your way," he growled as he walked away, but continued speaking under his breath. "Bloody female, you ain't normal, ain't nat'ral." After getting some distance between himself and the weasel, Mank looked at his good paw: He couldn't stop it from shaking.
[close]
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

The Grey Coincidence

You know, I'm very glad Faiyloe let me know that this is (only :() ten chapters long- I would have said something stupid like 'well that was anticlimactic' XD
Evidently I was right about Jarral- he was the victim of a woodlander attack, although the details are still fuzzy and obviously we don't know how 'in the right' he is, but considering Tebian, Restonor and company's appalling attitude towards verminkind (obviously not entirely unjustified, but still) I think it's fair to say that Jarral came off as rather sympathetic here- although alas, he lived too short (pardon the height pun).
And Ravax saved Restonor- honestly not sure if I agree with her decision, but the instant-PTSD was very well done.
I look forwards to seeing how this ending plays out (I'm also looking forwards to any sequels/prequels etc).
Update soon
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

The Skarzs

Here it is: The final chapter. It's the end of this story, but not the complete end. Enjoy.

Chapter Ten
Chapter Ten

   The morning sun tickled Burian's nose as he dozed in the corner of the south and west walls near the pond. He opened his eyes to the day, slowly waking his sore body. He became painfully aware of the wounds from the fight as he changed position, and he stopped so as not to hurt himself worse.
   The otter turned his head to look at Ravax, who was curled up in a ball beside him, still asleep. Ravax shifted softly and opened her eyes. Her smile vanished as she realized where she still was, the memories of the night before flooding back. She sat up and hugged her tail as she stared pensively at the pond.
   The two sat silently for some time, each with their own thoughts, but neither quite ready to speak.
   The fin of a fish disturbed the still water, and a bird sang its tune from somewhere above them. Clouds floated gently in the wind, decorating the sky with their white bodies as the sun warmed the earth. It was as if nature had not even noticed the events of the previous night.
   Burian looked across the lawns to the front gate, where a few Redwallers lined up the last of the dead vermin bodies. Other than that, though, there was almost nobeast outside.
   "Ah can no' stay in this death trap," Ravax whispered.
   "Think it's much safer outside?" asked Burian. "Jarral's army could still be out there."
   Ravax looked at Burian, disappointed. "Yew still do no' understand, do yew? That's what makes it safer. With Jarral gone all that's left is a bunch o' misfits like meh, desperately lookin' for a place they can call 'ome. Jarral promised them that. He promised us lots o' food, a warm bed every night, a roof o'er our heads when it rains, an' no fear that somebeast is gonna take it from us.
   "Not only that, he promised meh something special. He was gonna teach meh how to read and write." Ravax looked at the air as if a brilliant jewel hung before her. The gleam in her eye quickly dimmed and she looked down at her paws. "But that won't ever happen now."
   "You-" Burian stopped. He was going to say how all that could be found here, in Redwall, but knew it would do no good, especially when he himself chose to not even sleep within the abbey. He slumped down against the wall. "I don't blame you. For wanting that."
   He suddenly remembered something, and took something from his belt. "Here. You left this with me."
   Ravax took the copper object and turned it over in her paws. "Tha bracelet?"
   "Fair's fair. You can keep the payment."
   She nodded, and slipped it around her arm.
   They would have lapsed back into silence when Burian's aunt, Silia, came through the bushes near the pond. She stopped and looked at the two, then at Ravax. "Restonor wants to see you, miss. He's up in the infirmary."
   "Restonor?" asked Ravax, shrinking back. "The warrior?"
   "Yes."
   Burian stood. "C'mon, I'll come with you."
   "Ah can't go in there, what if someone tries to stab meh or somethin'?" she protested, her gaze shifting between Silia and the abbey.
   "Don't worry, I won't let anyone stab you," Burrian assured her.
   Ravax hesitated and then nodded, "Alright then." She took Burian's offered paw and let him help her to her feet. "But if someone does try to stab meh I'm leavin'."
    "Right."
    Silia led them into the abbey, and up to the infirmary, all the while not looking at either of them. Burian knew there were creatures watching them, but he ignored the glances and stares. When they at last arrived, Silia opened the door.
    Inside, several beds were taken up by wounded hares and a couple Redwallers, all of them asleep. On the far side of the room, Restonor was propped up in his bed against a pile of pillows. He turned his head as the door opened, and looked at Ravax.
    "Come in," he said. He saw the fear and hesitation in Ravax's face, and pulled back his sheets to reveal the bandages covering half his body. "I'm a broken warrior, ferret. I'm not going to harm you."
    Ravax glanced back at Burian before cautiously approaching the bed. She stopped at the foot of the bed, wringing her paws as she watched the warrior, and the sword that was propped against the bedpost near him.
    "I'm sorry," she muttered, her dark eyes brimming with tears.
    "Why did you kill the weasel?" asked Restonor. "You let him in. You could have let me die. But you didn't."
    Ravax looked at the ground. "There are children here, right? The way he was talkin', about the women and children. . . No one deserves that. . . to wake up in the middle of the night to the sounds o' screams and fightin', to watch their guardian fall, to run in fear 'til they collapse. . ." Ravaxes eyes glazed over in a memory as she stared out the window and a tear ran down her face. "An' come back to find 'em dead. . ." She looked back down at her trembling paws as another tear ran down her face. Her jaw tightened as she tried to hold them back. "No one deserves that," she repeated, her breath shaking.
    "No. . ." said Restonor, in almost a whisper. "No one." He closed his eyes for a few moments, then spoke again. "One more question: What now? I doubt you'll stay."
    Ravax quickly rubbed her eyes with the back of her paw and looked up at Restonor. "That's if yew'll let meh leave. When Ah get out o' here, Ah'm gettin' as far away from here as possible. Ah think we'll both be happier that way."
    "I've informed Lieutenant Tebian to have you left alone," said the warrior, looking out the window. "You can leave when you're ready. You too, Burian."
    The otter straightened, not sure how Restonor had guessed his intentions.
    The mouse continued. "For what it's worth, Ravax, I'd like to think you're not the same as other vermin."
    Ravax frowned. "Ah'm no' much different than the rest o' mah kind. Most of us just want to be left alone. Maybe if yew gave 'em a chance then you'd see that."
    Restonor went silent, still staring out the window.
    Ravax glanced back at Burian and took a couple of steps away from the bed. "If that was wall yew wanted t' say, Ah think Ah'll be leavin' now."
    Restonor only raised his paw in farewell. Burian took one last look at the wounded warrior before the door closed. He was no longer the grizzled, intimidating veteran he had first met. He was old now, and frail. . . Changed. And he would never lift the sword in battle again.

    Jessela stood on the path beneath the great wooden gates of the abbey. Since the bells had stopped tolling the night before all had been silent from the abbey. She clenched her paws to hide their shaking and took a deep breath.
    "I would like to speak to your leader to arrange for an exchange," she shouted up at the wall top.
    The head of a mouse popped over the ramparts, looking around behind Jessela for any sign of a trap. "I'll get the Abbot," he said.
    Jessela watched as the mouse disappeared back over the wall. She then looked back to where Amerun stood with the two otters by the ditch. Behind them the field was empty and deserted except for a single tent. Jessela walked back to them and placed a paw on Amerun's arm. "It's almost over, son," she sighed. She glanced sideways at the two otters. "What are you two staring at?"
    "What's in there you want to exchange with us?" asked Rurrock.
    Jessela shot Rurrock a mournful look. "Why should you care? You're going home."
    "Home? Home!" bellowed Rurrock, straining against the ropes that still bound him. "My home was destroyed by your brother, down to the last three! Tell me what can possibly replace that!"
    Jessela gave him a dead stare. "You're right, nothing can replace that. . . I should know. A holt just like yours, perhaps even the same, a patrol of hares from the mountain, a warrior from the abbey, shrews of the Guosim, they all came with swords and bows and slaughtered us in the night. My home became a sea of blood in the space of a few hours. A graveyard. . . My brother and I were the only ones to survive. All that pain and anger you are feeling right now we have felt for over twenty years. The feeling never truly goes away. . . but over time it will dull." Jessela turned to look at the abbey walls. More creatures were gathering, likely including the Abbot. "Come on, Amerun," said Jessela, beginning to walk.
    Amerun gave Rurrock and Torev a light shove toward the abbey. "You 'eard 'er," he said.
    The two otters walked along behind Jessela, the joy of being released smothered by their grief for the loss of their holt.
    Torev spoke up. "I thought ye wanted t' help conquer Redwall."
    "I don't care about Redwall. I just wanted my brother to be happy," she said.
    "Aye, an' I might've done the same." Torev frowned. "But it only would've caused more death."
    Jessela went silent, and she suddenly looked older, her body tired and worn, her shoulders slumped as she placed a paw comfortingly on her son's arm.
    Abbot Firrin above on the wall called down. "I am here. Where, and why, has the horde gone?"
    Jessels looked up at him. "With their leader gone they had no more reason to stay here. They left with the intention of getting as far away from this death trap as possible," she shouted.
    "Then why are you still here?" the abbot asked.
    "I wish to propose a trade. These otters, for Jarral's. . . body," she said, her voice faltering at the reality of the words.
    Firrin stepped back from the wall, and Jessela could no longer see him. It was only a few moments before he came back. "We agree to the trade. Give us some time to find the one you want, and we will bring him out." Then, the creatures atop the wall dispersed, save for a few Redwallers left to watch Jessela.
    Jessela took a shaky breath and stared at the large wooden gates framed in red stone. "All the stories must be true," she muttered to herself "This place is the true hellgates."
    The gate finally opened, and the abbot stepped out, followed by several others carrying a sad, cloth-covered bundle, and holding weapons. Firrin had Jarral's body brought close to Jessela, and set down on the path. "Here he is," the squirrel said.
    Jessela's eyes welled with tears as she fell to her knees beside the bundle and pulled the cloth away from the face with a shaking paw. A high pitched wail pierced the air and her shoulders shook as she clutched the fabric that covered his body "Go, just take them and go!" she cried, sobbing uncontrollably.
    Amerun untied Rurrock and Torev, who walked quickly to the safety of Redwall's open gate as the wearet crouched by his mother, holding her close to him as she wept.
    Firrin looked at the sad scene, unsure what to think. He turned to the Redwallers. "Go back inside."
    "But-" began Rurrock.
    "Let 'em be, Rurrock," said Torev. "We've all suffered enough."

    Burian and Ravax stood further down the wall, watching as Amerun picked up Jarral's body and followed his mother into Mossflower woods. Burian couldn't help but feel some amount of sorrow for Jessela, but had no pity for Jarral.
    Ravax took a shaky breath as guilt ripped at her insides. "Ah did this," she muttered. "She was so nice to meh. . . even after everything Ah did. This is mah fault,"
    "Somebeast was gonna die, no matter what," said Burian, looking at Ravax. "If it wasn't her who woulda lost something, it'd be somebeast else. Redwall, Jarral, you, me. . . Maybe we're all to blame."
    Ravax hesitated then nodded "Ah guess yew're right. . . let's get out o' here."
    "Probably should get supplies first."
    Ravax looked up at him. "Yew think yew can convince them to give us some?" she asked.
    "I think so," said Burian. "They might not like us but that don't mean they won't help. C'mon." He started off to the stairs.
    Ravax followed after him. "Yew mean they don't like meh," she clarified. "If it wasn't for meh then they wouldn't of 'ad a problem with yew."
    Burian stopped in the middle of the steps and looked at her. "I ain't sure about that. Probably wouldn't 've been able to stay 'ere anyway. I don't belong inside walls." He turned back and made the rest of the way down and walked toward the building.
    Ravax rushed to catch up, having to trot to match Burian's long strides, though she didn't mind. She was filled with a new energy at the idea of leaving the abbey for good. "Though, one thing Ah will admit, the food here's almost too good to be true. They 'ave an entire jar just for candied nuts right next to the flower and sugar. When Ah was little, Uncle would make them as a treat around harvest time, but we never had them around all seasons!"
    "Yeah. . . Maybe we can get some of those," said Burian, opening the door to the abbey. He thought of the good food Ravax talked about. "Trifles, scones, that drink (what was it?) locked-over ale, pasties. . ." He grimaced. "Problem is, you'll never stop eating the stuff."
    "Must be why they're so soft and chubby here." Ravax laughed and smiled as they made their way through the abbey toward the kitchen.
    "Wait. . . Who was 'uncle'?" asked Burian.
    "Ah. . . Ah'll tell yew later."
    They just entered Cavern Hole when Burian stopped, and Ravax looked to a table near the kitchen entrance. There, eating some much-needed food, were Rurrock and Torev, accompanied by Silia and some other infirmary nurses. Ravax shrank back. "Maybe we should just go," she breathed, but it was too late; Rurrock had seen them.
    He stood upright, knocking his stool over. Torev turned to see what Rurrock was looking at, and he stopped eating as well. The two pairs stared at each other for some time until Burian took Ravax by the arm and pulled her along to the two otters.
    "No! No no no," Ravax protested as she tried to pull free, panic welling up inside her as she was dragged closer.
    Rurrock spoke to Silia without taking his eyes off Burian and Ravax. "Why is she still here? Why?"
    "Burian insists that she stays for a little while. . ." said Silia, wringing her paws. "Until they leave."
    Rurrock growled. "But why is she still alive? She took the weasel's side. She knew him!"
    "Yes, and she killed him!" cried Burian, stepping toward Rurrock as he let the ferret go. "She saved your lives whether or not you wanna believe it."
    "But my entire holt is dead."
    Burian looked at the ground. "I know. . . I'm sorry. But the vermin to blame are gone."
    Rurrock moved to stand right in front of the younger otter, locking eyes with him. "Are they?"
    "Yes."
    The air almost cracked with the tension between the two, when Torev stood up and pounded the table hard with his bony paw. "Enough!"
    All eyes turned to him.
    "No more fighting!" he said, fire flashing in his eyes, and he seemed to grow in size with a fury uncommon for the old otter. But then, it was gone, and he shrank back down. "Please. . . no more."
    Rurrock ripped his eyes away from Torev, wiping away a tear that flowed from his eye. He sat back down and held his face in his paws. Silia put a paw on his shoulder, and looked at Burian and Ravax.
    "I have bags packed for you, but if you think you need more, take what you want. And the Abbot has had your weapons put in the gatehouse."
    At the mention of food and weapons Ravax forced her gaze away from Torev and Rurrock and looked up at Burian. "D'you think Ah could get one of those daggers they took from the corpses?" she asked "Ah lost mine in the orchard last night an' Ah have a feeling yew're no' about to let me steal one." She chuckled, but went quiet when she saw the shocked look on Silia's face.
    ". . . Thank you, Silia," said Burian, taking a quick glance at Ravax. "We'll see," he mumbled as they went into the kitchen. 
    The two packs were set by the door, full to the top and pushing at the seams with food. Burian's belongings were there as well: his blanket, restocked medical supplies, and various other things. Ravax searched through her pack until she came up with some of the candied chestnuts, which she wolfed down right there.
    They shouldered their packs, and exited the kitchen. Ravax went on ahead, but Burian stopped to take one last look at his Aunt Silia, Old Torev, and Rurrock. The former two gazed back at him. Burian raised his paw in goodbye, which was returned by the two otters. Rurrock didn't even acknowledge he was there.
    Burian turned back and hurried after Ravax, and they said nothing as they exited Cavern Hole. Redwallers cleared the way for the bold pair, watching as they made their way through the abbey. They went through the great arches of the abbey, with its tapestries and pillars, the sunlight creeping through the high stained-glass windows, not stopping. It may be glorious, Burian thought, but it isn't home.
    They were just about to leave the building when the sound of tiny paws came up behind them, and a little voice cried out. "Cuzzin Boreein!"
    Burian turned to see Kelece launch herself at him, and attach herself firmly to his legs. "Don't go, Boreein!" she cried. "I don't wan' you to go!"
    Burian smiled sadly as he bent down to pick Kelece up. "I have to," he said.
    "But why?"
    "Because I'm not happy here."
    "Why?"
    Burian stopped and looked off into the distance. "I. . . I don't know. It's nice here. You have your aunt Silia, and Rurrock, and old funny Torev. You can be happy here. You'll make lots of friends, you'll have lots of tasty food. . ." He tickled Kelece's belly, and smiled at her laughter as tears welled up in his eyes. "But I still need to find my own home."
    Kelece held Burian's face with her tiny paws, looking into his wet eyes. "Will it be a nice home?"
    Burian laughed. "Yes. Yes, it will be nice."
    "Will you have lotsa friends?"
    "Aye, lots of friends. And good food, too!"
    Kelece pushed herself away from Burian, and he set her down. She wiped her eyes, and grinned. "Go find your home, cuzzin Boreein!"
    Ravax smiled as she watched the innocent young otter; she would be happy and safe here. Ravax glanced down at the bag of chestnuts she had been eating from, then back at the Kelece. "Here," she said, squatting down in front of her and holding the bag out to Kelece. The little otter's eyes lit up as she took the bag of glittering candy nuts.
    "Thanks for sharing yewr food with me at the holt," Ravax said.
    Kelece held the bag close and ran off yelling: "Thank you!"
    Ravax smiled and straightened, turning to Burian. "Let's get going."
    The other nodded, and they made their way to the gatehouse. Lieutenant Tebian was waiting there, with Perthem, and at a word from his officer, the young hare collected Burian's sword and gave Ravax a long knife, and then stood to the side.
    Ravax took the knife and pulled it part way from the sheath to see the blade before replacing it and quickly glancing at Perthem, "Thanks," she muttered hurriedly.
    The hares said nothing.
    Burian strapped his sword around his waist, and the two walked to the main gate. The gatekeeper mouse stood up from his chair and opened the oaken doors for them. Burian stepped out onto the path, looking around him. In front of him lay the plains, stretching for miles upon miles with dry grass that rattled in the late summer wind. On his left, the southern lands closed into forests, and far off, great white-capped mountains. Behind him was Redwall. The otter took one last look back at the towering rose-hued walls, ancient, and full of history, joy, sadness, and all manner of times.
    He turned to Ravax as she joined him on the path. "Well?" he asked. "I dragged you along here. Now it's your turn. Where do we go?"
    Ravax looked down the path and cocked her head. "Ah was thinking o' going back north. . . Ah grew up there. . . but it's not as safe for woodlanders up there. Yew don't 'ave to come if yew don' want to."
    "Fair enough," said Burian with a grin, his eyes bright beneath his looming eyebrows. "Let's go."

    Lieutenant Tebian and two of his hares stood inside Jarral's tent, left set up after the weasel's army had left. They looked around the tent, most of the belongings removed, likely from the other vermin ransacking their fallen leader's riches. Not much was left save for the cot (stripped of blankets), a bucket of water with a bar of soap set on the edge, three chests with their contents flung everywhere, and the polished wooden desk and chair in the center of it all.
    Perthem picked up one of the books from the ground. "Look at this, sah! These chests were full of. . . scrolls, and books."
    "Only thing worth anything left in here, wot?"
    Tebian rubbed his chin, poking through a pile of manuscripts with his sword. "But then why're they 'ere in the first place? Vermin don't read, wot? He didn't speak like h'a normal bally vermin, h'of course. . ." He turned to the desk, where one book was placed squarely in the center.
    "What do you suppose we should do with the jolly things, sah?"
    Tebian didn't answer right away, as he was looking at the title on the book. The words Unnatural were newly printed in crisp neat letter across the cover. He picked up another book. Trade and Commerce. And another. Weasels, Rats, and Kin: Nature, or Nurture? He stared at them, hardly believing what they implied.
    ". . . Lieutenant?"
    "Gather them up," said Tebian, shoving the books under his arm. "I think there's some reading t'be done."

~End~
[close]
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

The Grey Coincidence

I *definitely* wasn't brought to tears. No, dry eyes right here. Dry... Dry...  :'( :'( :'(
Ahem, I'm going to reiterate- I am eagerly (albeit patiently) awaiting any continuation of this story.
This ending was a textbook example of how to pull off bittersweet in my own humble opinion. On the one hand, Jarral the 'big' bad is dead, the abbey has been saved (again) Amerun is still alive and Burian and Ravax are leaving (it's bittersweet in a special kind of way that Burian doesn't belong in Redwall, or at least, doesn't want to stay). But at the same time, the abbey warrior is a broken old mouse, Jarral might not have been a saint (and apparently I was right about the 'woodlander attack on vermin camp thing') but Jessela's reaction to her little (I'm assuming in both senses of the word but I'm not sure) brother's death does throw him up the rankings a little bit. And Rurrock's clan is dead for sure- although we already knew that it's emphasized a bit more here so yeah, very bittersweet ending.
Do you play guitar? Or is that my heartstrings?
This has been a lot of fun reading/reviewing.
I don't have anything critical to say as of now, but I'll add it when I think of something.
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

The Skarzs

Thank you so much for reading this, Grey! Your reaction is exactly what I wished to incite from readers. Dance my puppets. Your hearts are my stringed marionettes.

Any criticism would be welcome.
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

The Grey Coincidence

You're welcome, and it wasn't pleasure.
The only 'critical' thing I can think of is that Burian and Ravax ended up friends a bit quickly- but they're friendship is more of an unsteady balancing act than anything else so I'm not sure if that counts.
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

Captain Tammo

I only had time to look at chapter 1 tonight, but I wanted to drop a line and say a few words. You two did a really nice job setting up a situation where neither Ravax nor Burian were fully in control of the situation. They each needed something from the other and had to give something up as well and that gave them a chance to work together. It's different from the usual hostage vs. captor dynamic we see in the Redwall books. Something like this carries a bit more tension with it and it gives a nice flow to things. Well done!
"Cowards die a thousand times, a warrior only dies once. The spirits of all you have slain are watching you, Vilu Daskar, and they will rest in peace now that your time has come. You must die as you have lived, a coward to the last!" -Luke the warrior

The Skarzs

Sorry for not seeing this until now.

Thanks for that, Tammo! I hope the rest of it holds as much enjoyment for you!
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

Jack the Quick

Wow... you're really good. the only thing I was a little confused about was when Ravax got sick over the dead weasel because I don't remember any weasels. But that doesn't really matter. The story is amazing!
'I ate the sharpest tool in the shed'

"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

The Skarzs

Thank you very much, Jack!
Yeah, there were a couple of parts we missed, but oh well. ^-^
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.