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You know you have been reading too much Redwall when...

Started by Matthias720, August 07, 2011, 06:30:02 PM

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Luther of Redwall

Actually-didn't-read-all-of-them-so-I'm-not-sure-if-this-one-is-already-used-but-anyway-here's-375- When you eat scones and drink mint tea quite often
Life is fair because it is unfair to everyone.

HeadInAnotherGalaxy

Vhen vhenever ye gae tae a food market ye vant tae 'oide in ze fruitz an' vegetablez an' leap oot at beaztz zhoutin'/chantin' "FLITCHAYE FLITCHAYE FLITCHAYE!!!"
NARDOLE; You are completely out of your mind!
DOCTOR: How is that news to anyone?

"I am Yomin Carr, the harbinger of doom. I am the beginning of the end of your people!" -Yomin Carr

-Sometime later, the second mate was unexpectedly rescued by the subplot, which had been trailing a bit behind the boat (and the plot). The whole story moved along.

Flib Bigboat

377. When you take the trouble to make a list of all the things in this thread you are guilty of.

Spoiler
4. You can write fluently in Royal House of Riftgard Script.
10. You desire to find a high wall so you can take breakfast on top of it
11. instead of saying "you people" you accidentally say "you beasts"
15. Your talking to your friends and you just randomly spout out facts or information about Redwall.
20. Every time you see a badger you bow to it and say. "Oh! Lord Brocktree! Please forgive my intrusion." and then you back off slowly, praying that it doesn't have a sword with it.
24. You've spent more than 3 full days of you life on this forum
25. You've read through the entire series at least a dozen times.
30. Every time you say, 'Everyone' or 'no one' or 'someone', you think, 'Everybeast' etc.
35. You start talking like a hare.
36. You start talking like a mole.
37. You have a sudden urge to solve riddles and go on quests.
39. When you look up pictures of badgers on the Internet, you say to yourself, 'That one's Lord Brocktree, that one's Cregga Rose Eyes, That one's Lord Rawnblade...
42. You spend a lot of time trying to come up with things to add to "You know you have been reading too much Redwall when..."
43. You look at your dinner and start to think what it would look like in Redwall.
47: You pick up the table in your dining room and yell triumphantly "Yes! I am as strong as Constance!"
48: Whenever you see a ferret, you call it Veil or Swartt.
53. You count the days until you're old enough to buy a real sword.
54. You can refer everything to Redwall
55. When your sad you think of Redwall.
56. Reading Redwall is a competitive sport for you.
57. You look at people and think of them as a animal.
59. When your suppose to be doing chores you sneak off to read.
61. you say wot wot alot
63. You start calling your hands paws
71. When you pick up a broom, hold it like a pike, and yell, 'I am Cregga Rose Eyes! EULAAALIAAAAA!'
72. You start calling your food "vittles", "scoff" etc
73. When you are walking to somewhere you start singing marching songs.
76. You have been punished for reading Redwall, and not reading your history books.
81. You quote from the series as part of your regular schtick.
83: When you truly believe that you can speak fluent Sparra.
97. You go out in the woods with your bows and shoot at stumps pretending they are various Redwall vermin.
100: You actually got excited when you saw that this site has reached number 100 in this thing. I did.
103: You want to be captain of a ship and become a corsair.
105. You wish you could be the abbey bell ringer
111: You love all kind of rodents when everyone you know hates them
113. You come up with alternate titles for each of the three 'books' in a Redwall novel
114. When you see a random squirrel in the woods (who just happens to have rather dark fur) and name it Ranguvar.
115. When you make up your own character for each Redwall book just so you can be part of the adventure.
116. When you go on a hike and look off the path to a heavily wooded area and think "There's Redwall!"
122. You don't have to wonder about the inconsistencies in Redwall because you know why they're there
124: Every time you see a squirrel, mole, vole, otter, wildcat, stoat, ect. you try to guess what kind of weapon they use.
143. You name each room in your house things like Cavern Hole, Great Hall etc.
150. Go on this walk and you use the scarf you are wearing as a sling. Load it up with a stone from the road and swing it, because the Painted Ones are in the trees by the road.
154. You log on to the forum, and this is the first thread you check.
155. You can open any Redwall book to any page, read the first line your eye falls on, and can quote the rest of the chapter from memory.
161. You finishRogue Crew and start bawling cuz there's nothing left but fanfics!
183-You spend looooong nights thinking up new chracter names.
187-when ye start talkin' like a 'ighlander
208. You bug your family out of their minds with phrases beginning 'Someone on the Redwall forum said...'
234.  You want to be a writer, and decide that Brian Jacques is the ultimate role model in this area (again, guilty!)
238. When you talk about something and end up talking about Redwall.
246: When you oddly find yourself constantly looking for a new book, even though last time you looked was five minutes ago.
You imagine yourself as RW characters for at least an hour every day.
You feel the urge to solve riddles
You take a kitchen knife and say it's a weapon of Redwall
You spend 2 hours or more  at a time reading Redwall
You get told off for speaking like a hare, wot wot!
When you call small children dibbuns
When you post on this thread even though no one has for a while
When you can recite the riddle behind the Tapestry.
You automatically say "paw" instead of "hand".
When your taking notes at school and you doodle Redwall characters on the sides.
You write down the royal house of rift guard script in your notebook
361: You write a redwall book
366: When every time you daydream, you're some animal or character from the books.
when you want to hold the Sword of Martin.
373: When you've drawn around 300 redwall characters
[close]
Life is often like pushing a luggage cart through the airport. Sometimes I feel ridiculous, sometimes I look ridiculous, but I just keep pushing that luggage cart, and hoping I'm generally heading in the right direction.
Always keep your word, always finish what you started, and never go unprepared.
In a hole in the ground, there once lived a hobbit.
It's your birthday today, everybeast say hooray, there's a cat licking your birthday cake, it's your birthday today!
Long live the RRR!