Final Fantasy VII in Spanish... what a trip

[Luftwaffles]

Ok so, I don't know how many of you have actually played this game when it was new (I certainly didn't) or even if you are familiar with the name (this one in particular was one of the greatest games on PS1, but that was literally ages ago, so I wouldn't be surprised if you don't know anything about it). The game is great, but that's not what it makes it such an experience while played by a Spanish-speaker player, no, that would have been so predictable... the thing that makes it such an experience is the quality of the translations. They are all incredibly hilarious because they make little-to-no-sense at all, and they are all "Google translator" level (yes).

I don't know who made this translations, but somebody obviously got paid for that. And, in that regard, this is one of the most curious things on video game history

I'm gonna post a few that were already taken, posted and commented by Akusoft (a Spanish Gamer who played the game to a certain extent to showcase they breathtaking nature of this jewels) as well as to comment on them so you can see the errors.



This one is not that big, they basically forgot to capitalize the first letter and translated the "you" as a plural, so it reads "hey, all of you!".



Nothing special here, I just like how he has a poster of a bolt in his room xD



This one is the perfect example of the kind of translations showcased in this game: first, it is incredibly redundant (the word "materia" is used three times in a row). Also, there should be a space in between the forth and fifth words, and I don't know why there's a special character in there... it should have been a simple accent. They obviously didn't proofread any of this.



"This is the save point" or, as the game calls it, "this is the famous point-save!!!".



"They say that there's no grass nor flowers in Midgar, but for some reason, there are flowers".



"Oh this isn't fun!" that, of course, should have been "Oh, isn't this fun?". I love how they took everything literally... seriously, stuff like this gives a whole new meaning to an already great game. I'm not gonna play it for the story or the characters, but to laugh.



This one isn't BAD, he IS the mayor, but it is "Alcalde" in Spanish.



This is classic and it is all over the game as well: more than half the time, the feminines are translated as masculines and vice-verse.



An entire sector has been wiped out, but the news guy says that there hasn't been any victims xD



"I should make it if I jump before it gets close"... the wording is ok there, but it should be the other way around. It is precisely when it gets closer that you should hop on it.



Just like the poster in his room, this one makes me chuckle. The sign is the one engaging you into a battle



The translation for "party" changes constantly in the game: first it's "partido", then "fiesta" and later it will be something else. I love it.



It most of the dialogues, Sephirot is referred as such, but in some scenes his name is changed to "Sefirot".



"Have another go" and "later!" are translated as "podemos ir otra vez" y "màs tarde"... as in "we can go again" and, well, "later".



"If you want me that bad" is something like "if you don't like me..." here.



Pacman!!!



"Waterpolo" XD!





They basically say that, to be safe while crossing the electricity pylon, you have to go with a Dolphin oO.



"How cold" instead of "how cool".



"Hey you, are you making fun of the Army?"

"What if I'm doing it?/What if I'm doing it". Those are literally the same two responses, but with different wording.



Press the "butòn".




"How to save someone/how to save the game".



"The president and his men are in the ship, if they spot you, the will break you one". One what?.



"I don't even like Sefirot". That's fine, we are here to beat him up. Those dialogues, man.



"Are you getting bored?"

"Not so much".

"Yes, we are fighting quite a bit".

So... I really am bored, aren't I?





"We are going to do snowboarding this year" *looks at the place and the surf boards in the background*. Reallyyyy? Tough task there, mate.



"That guy has put us in a tough spot... he has taken over the restroom" LOL xD



"Hey! I'm not stupid. I don't like to draw castles in the sky. Smart, don't you think?".



"Hurray!" "Help!"... what the...?



The enemy is literally called "fatty" xD!



"This is the ranch ^^".



"These are tough times. I'm looting the place". EPIC.



It should ask me if I want to ride the tram, but it is asking me if I want to drive it instead !



Allow me to introduce you with "Mr executioner", a hangman xD!



"So... you can ONLY see the future?".

Ok, that's it. I can talk about this for another DAY and that wouldn't make a difference. The Spanish translation to this game is hilarious and it's filled with "what the heck moments". It should be noted that I have been picking moments at random, though, so the story is not spoiled.

Enjoy !

[Mhera]

The was all pretty funny, but the electricity pylon/dolphin thing was especially hilarious

[Skyblade]

Ha, que chido! The "hurra"/"ayuda" one is hilarious.

[Luftwaffles]

Thanks for the comments, I really appreciate them

Let's jump right into part 2. Shall we?



"Dude, is this the first time you fight a reactor?".



"Press that button". Don't mind the fact that there are like seven of them.



This one is really broken, but I would like to highlight the fact that he is talking directly to the camera, staring at the player while saying something like "Did you say something?!".



A simple question like "Am I in the right way?" is mauled to become "I'm in way?". Also, the game is telling us to press the SELECTBotòn to confirm that. Why the select button anyway?



"You have the buy the memory card on an (actual) store". Oh really? xDD



"Mas tarde" you are going to take care of the rest. "Later" is, once again, used as a time measurement.



"My flowers are special, they are completely useless". XD



"Don't you ever dare to break into my house and open the fridge again!". Dude, a NPC with a brain! I never thought I'd see the day!



"Are you finished?" xD



"Well, my dad (who's the owner of this store) has been very depressed lately. He is the one who makes all the dresses".



"So, we can't get a suit unless we do something about your dad, right?".



"Excuse me, are you the father?".



"I'm the owner of the store, but I'm not her father".



"I didn't say so". Ooooook.



"You want something...

Bright.

Shiny."

Nice options.



"You know the GYM?

You can find many people like you there". People like me? XD



"Merma (decrease)" is used to indicate that the enemy missed the attack.



"And, on top of everything, we have this: there's been an accident today". The news guy has had enough xD



"Aeris, you are a very special boy".



"I'm sure that you hear voices when you are alone" oO.



"You are going after her, right?" That should have been the right sentence, but instead of that, we got something like "you have got the next turn after her".



"Are you going up there, you better carry the Zinc Battery with you".



"Ok, I will carry it".

"You are just talking nonsense".

Why can't I select both options? D:



"Hey are you? You are...".



"I don't need an appointment, this is an emergency!". Dude, I thought that we were going to loot the place



"I don't want any money, we are not criminals" (see above).



"Flush the toilet / climb on top of it" LOL.



"Breath" He looks like a Cthulhu, doesn't he?



"Colmillo Trineo" (something like "sledge fang") instead of "Trinity Fang".



"I, I heard it on the Church at the suburbs. Mother told me that Midgar was no longer safe. That's... my true mother". What?

[Skyblade]

Sounds like you're enjoying yourself

My favorites are the special flowers and the zinc battery.

[Luftwaffles]

Sounds like you're enjoying yourself

My favorites are the special flowers and the zinc battery.

Yeah, but I'm struggling to find more material (not all of it it's suitable for all audiences). This would do:



"What happened to this place? It looks... finished".

I'm guessing that that dialogue sequences wasn't meant to be there... That place doesn't look "finished" to me.



"If you see a weapon that you like, you had better buy it!".



"Do you like me?" WHAT?



"Esto vuele mal" (as in, this stinks). It obviously should have been something like "something's fishy here". Moving on.



"Here's the military soldier!".



"The safety of the president is warranted because we are here". In the bar?



"Ok, you are fired!" From the Army??







"¿Lo llamas una noche?" as in "Let's call it a night" but it's not quite the same.



"I have a bad felting about this".



"Hey, are you the "elderly"?"



"Jejeje... your luck has run out". oO



"Wiii!" "Leave me alone!".



"Handsome" XD



Spencer??? XD



"We do a pretty outstanding act, we do it today, but come here tomorrow and you'll see it".



Puf: Hey Kid!



Man: Are you having fun?



(If you tell him that you are not having fun in his amusement park):

Dio: Jajajajaj that's a good one. But you shouldn't lie, that ain't right.

And you shouldn't change your name, darn it.



"What?"

"Many things".

And that's all you'll ever hear from him.



I love this guy, he works at the "haunted house" and he really shows it



"Let me tell you something, rookie". Why the heck didn't they translate that? It should have been "novato" is quite simple!



"Mmph! And old man!"



Rrrggh!

XD