Food Fight 2.0

[Russa Nodrey]

* Russa Nodrey breaks Dels neck with a potato.

[Amarith Waterspring]

Hey a football isn't food! Russa, that must have been one hard potato..... O.o

*Smashes a lemon meringue pie into the face of-*

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

*...A Deaz Defyin' Beaver vho vaz aboot tae Delthion*

*Launchez Ztravberry Zoop at Russa*

[Amarith Waterspring]

Noooooooo! *Tragically dives in front of Russa and swallows the soup*

[Russa Nodrey]

Thief! I was gonna eat that!

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

Me zizter ance tried tae make a Ztravberry Pie. Zat vaz ze rezult.

[Maudie]

* Mask explodes an enormous banana cream pie

[Hickory]

Weapons of choice:

Caviar: An elegant weapon, from a more civilized age.
Hamburger: Pure American consumerism. Mass produced, but not terribly lethal.
Hot dog: American tradition. The Coney Dog variant is far more effective.
Submarine sandwich: Mid-range weapon, hefty at times. Use with steak, mushrooms, and provolone for increased damage.
Spaghetti: Italian tradition turned 'Murican. Slows down enemies in a sea of noodles.
Pizza: The Friday favorite of American school cafeterias. Best when you've scored a headshot.
Baguette: The ultimate melee weapon. Once in the hands of a skilled chef, no one can stand against it.
Casserole: Bane of American children everywhere. Dump it on your enemies for increased hit points, instead of catapulting it with a spoon.
Chocolate Chip Cookie: Food Frisbee. Hurl this deadly confectionary at the other side to instantly knock out a target. Ricochets until it hits someone.
Spicy Thai Curry: Capable of incapacitating even the "strongest" Southerner, this tongue-numbing liquid can stun targets for up to 5 minutes. Useful when in conjunction with
Fried Rice: Another Thai food, the shower of tiny grains of rice can totally destroy stunned opponents. Best used with above food.
Mashed Potatoes: The filler food of American bellies. Slop this over your opponents until they are covered in a mound of mush. Use the school cafeteria version for a stronger material.
Cream Pie: Famous. If thrown at an enemy's head, it will splatter whipped cream all over them, in addition to blinding them.
Fudge Brownies: Not lethal, but incredibly dangerous none the less. Once eaten, the brownie will glue the victim's mouth shut, preventing them from calling for reinforcements.

Defensive foods:

Water: This surprisingly versatile liquid can neutralize any traps. Counter: Oils.
Soda: Carbonated beverage. Useful to find out if enemies are approaching, after dumping the liquid on the floor it will remain in a perpetual state of semi-liquidity, which makes an annoying sticking sound when stepped on.
Pancakes: drive back your enemies with floppy circles. Who falls to a pancake? you might ask. More like ten pancakes launched simultaneously. Plaster that pesky juggernaut with hundreds of circular pastries. Then dump maple syrup on them to add insult to injury.
Waffles: Knock-off pancakes. Hardly as effective, yet useful as secondary ammunition.
Ham and cheese sandwich: Leave the mayo off this sandwich to make a dry tasting lunch that falls apart halfway through launching! Swamp the enemy in hundreds of slices of meat, cheese, and whole-grain bread. Disgusting!
PB&J: It's great the first time, but sucks the next. Annoy the enemy with that one drop of jam that JUST WON'T RUB OFF!

WMDs:

Bacon: This delicious slice of pork just can't be refused. Shower your enemies in bacon laced with cyanide. Watch them gorge themselves on the "spoils of war" and then foam at the mouth before keeling over!
Cinnamon Crunch cereal: This irresistibly delicious breakfast cereal addicts your enemies to its tasty crunch! Watch from afar as the enemy's country crumbles over a crippling reliance on breakfast cereal!
Calzone: This level-up on the normal pizza slice can decimate enemy lines. Arm the bomb and set it in place! The contained heat inside the delicious crust will eventually explode in a blast of hot air! Useful for taking out enemy emplacements.
Burrito: No matter what's in it, this Mexican food will blast away - literally - your enemy. Take a bite, blow in, and watch a missile made of beans, sour cream, rice, steak, corn, tomatoes, and various other delicious foods smash into the enemy camp and leave a smoking crater.