Black and White: Things That Relate To It But Are Not The Story Itself

[The Grey Coincidence]

I don't mind the story thread getting muddled, but I guess it may be annoying for readers. Also this is probably a better place for things like character names and their deeper meanings.
I know Brian Jacques wasn't a big fan of deeper meanings and stuff, but I like to put things in, for the reward of more attentive persons So trivia/reviews/questions go here. Now for the information I'd like to share.
I love vermin-but I love vermin AS vermin. It's their snivelly/rude/deceptive nature that appeals to me (that and they are funny) but I hate that they all just die to the super-ultra-good heroes. Like, really? That's not realistic.
Now I love Redwall, but I read few fanfics and even fewer books, so my writing is probably not the best. I do take criticism well (I think) so if you spot any errors please do not hesitate to shoot me down (preferably not with otter javelins).
Fret is a what could have been of Veil if Byrony was less naive (not that Constance is perfect or anything). If you read the story then you have probably guessed/noticed that Fret's suffering is mostly due to horrible communication skills, which fits in with the vermin nature of not looking weak and other things. His name underlines his state of mind, as he really does spend a fair bit of word-time worrying. I shan't say more.
There is more to it, but I'll spell it all out later if needed.
I try to add depths to my characters (not easy considering everything else I've written is Kung Fu Panda...) , so there is probably something behind everything they do, and if anybeast has any questions about why they do something I would be happy to answer.
I also would like to warn people: I am eclectic. I get ideas from EVERYWHERE, mostly unconsciously to my grave misfortune. Therefore if I do 'copy' something, please say so and I will take steps to alter it.
Finally to end this ramble Grey Claw is spelled Greyclaw as well. I honestly could not choose the 'correct' spelling. (Though by books Greyclaw is correct).

[The Grey Coincidence]

The poll is just for fun for the story so far. So who is your favourite character? Why?

[The Grey Coincidence]

So Book I is almost done in mine first Redwall fanfic. I think I've done well so far, though I don't think I've really captured the style of it (and the accents... don't get me started on how hard it is for an amateur to write accents), I am proud. It has a lot of subtle details-which is not something I am usually good at or do, for that matter. If I had to make one improvement it would be to try and make the fic a bit less... I don't know, sad? Sad doesn't really seem like the word, but I feel like an emo writing this thing!
So, what do yall think?

[The Grey Coincidence]

Sigh, Book I is complete, and Book II is beginning. I'm going to try and make it funnier, as I love writing comedy. Book II is also probably the longest book. I have everything planned ahead up till a certain point, but the ending is still an open book (hahahaha, what a funny pun am I right?) The average Redwall book is about 100-150k words, and really I wouldn't be surprised if I get around that amount here (which would also make it my longest work by a pretty wide margin).
On Fanfiction. Net (my main account) this story is somehow my third-most viewed at 2k (yay! I dunnoifthatsoundsimpressiveornotbutwhocaresright?), which is kind of a feat seeing as only a third of it's done, another third is being written and the third third is up in the air.
So far writing Redwall has been... different... to what I usually do. I like writing comedies or action comedies and while Black and White has got action I think the drama is the biggest difference. I put a lot of emphasis on the characters in my writing and try to keep them motivated by the same things, and to keep them consistent and stuff and to develop them, but somehow it gets brought out more easily here than it ever did on Kung Fu Panda (I've written so many KFP stories and so far the character development has been... really low... except for one guy but he doesn't exactly develop... rather his situation...changes, ye get me right?)
Another thing to point out are the changes in Fight-Scene-Writing. Now I started writing fanfiction a while ago. In stories like Hercules you can really pull out all the stops in writing (a guys knocks out someone by whipping them with his long, blonde hair... no spoilers but if you want a laugh I highly reccomend The Twelve Great Labours Of Hercules). In KFP it's more complicated since what I write isn't very much about Kung Fu Panda, rather animals using Kung Fu in China, along with a bunch of other 'magic' abilities. The fights there are very... anime-ey? Think Naruto pre-shippuden, where everyone has their unique movesets and it's like a chess match of Kung Fu/ magic action. But in Redwall the fighting is a bit more... real? The magic here is quite low-key, so that's a given. Armour makes a difference in Redwall verse (unless you're fighting a badger, but then you'd most likely be doomed anyways) and aside from good camouflage and slight variations in fighting styles there isn't much space for action (most of Redwall is army vs army instead of beast vs beast,this is the opposite of my KFP works where almost everything is 1 v 1). I haven't written any proper army vs army stuff yet but it *may* happen.
Anyways that is enough for one overly-talkative author. Enjoy!

[Nadaz, voice of the host]

Fret is my favorite character, I really like the story keep up the good work!

[The Grey Coincidence]

Thank you Mr Nadaz for thy kind words.

[The Grey Coincidence]

Okaaaaaaaay, this part is now complete. Obviously you can expect the story to continue, but there will be a timeskip, and er... that's the reason this chapter took... so... fricking... long... to come out. Sigh.

I'm going to stress that this timeskip is important. The most important thing about it is actually how long it is. All along I have been writing this story without a set outcome. I mean I've had ideas about how it's going to end but those all fall under two categories.

While this fic does have a large cast of characters, ultimately Fret is the protagonist, and the story's main conflict is his morality/confusion/coming-of-age. So the endings have two possibilities... either he ends up 'good' or he ends up 'bad', though he'll always be somewhat in the middle. And because I haven't stuck to an ending, most likely this fic will go on hiatus for another while. Apologies.

[The Grey Coincidence]

No longer on hiatus... well actually it'll go back to 'once a month-ish' updates since I still need to work on my other fics. But the timeskip is over and one major development is over.

[Captain Tammo]

I have a question, going way back to chapter 1, part 1. So Fret seems to have feelings for this albino at the abbey, or at least is fascinated by her. I was curious if this character's albinism is a symbol of purity or of a kind of righteousness. And Fret longing for her and seeming to fall flat goes hand in hand with how he longs for a ferret to do something noteworthy, but also falls flat. It reinforces that feeling of how he is not like the abbey dwellers. Am I on to something there?

Then again, I'm really only at the second chapter now, so I've quite a ways to go..

[The Grey Coincidence]

I would say that you were on to something noteworthy- but at the same time don't want to blow my own trumpet so to speak.
Yes, I suppose you could read the albino like that- I actually like what you came up with and will probably use it to some extent later on.
But when I first wrote it, I wasn't thinking as deeply about it as all that.
Eh don't worry about catching up too much, I don't write that fast anyways.

[Captain Tammo]

I hear you there. Writing takes ages, but you're work is paying off! I just finished chapter two, I like where this is going. There's always a lot of pressure on those first few chapters to get readers hooked. Looking forward to getting around to the next bit!

Also, I couldn't help but notice how much Fret hates molespeech. Are these perhaps the lamentations of the author figuring out how to write it?

[The Skarzs]

Or the true feelings of the writer coming out in his work.

[The Grey Coincidence]

I don't hate molespeech, it bugged me at first because I thought it was a horrible series of typos. But I kinda green fond of it as time went by. Of course... Writing it is not exactly the same. But that's me with *most* accents. It doesn't help that moletalk is so distinctive.
Funny you noticed that really.

[Captain Tammo]

Chapters 3 and 4 down! Poor Fret! You can tell this guy is just feeling himself get ripped apart left and right. One thing you've done nicely so far is keeping his character consistent in each chapter, and that's helped with the character development a good bit! At least that's what I think.

About the two vermin he met, Grey and Sharpie, did you by chance pull those names out of thin air when you saw a grey-colored permanent marker on your desk? They're nice names for this story nevertheless! I feel like they'd be the names of more lovable or good vermin. Grey is a perfect name for a "grey" character and making a point to the reader, and Sharpie sounds like a baby vermin's name since they usually have sharp consonants in their names (ex: Urgan Nagru, Korvus Skurr, Clogg...). That doesn't have to have been what you meant, just some fun I was having while reading it!

[The Grey Coincidence]

Yay I did character development good. Whoppee.
Names and me have a never-ending struggle. Honestly I just find it hard to name things/characters. So, generic as grey coloured permanent markers may or may not be, we have Sharpfur (Sharpie) and Greyclaw (Grey). It's also why I borrow so many names from pre-existing characters. (Constance, Bella, Abbot *Martin*)