Jokes

[Tiria Wildlough]

Didja hear the one about the smart blonde?

*laughter*

[Skyblade]

"Have you heard the me neither joke?"
"No"
"Me neither"

[Tiria Wildlough]

Fear of spiders is arachnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is called claustrophobia, and fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter.

Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

When the Bogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

That's enough for now, I think.

[Capn Greypatch]

What do you call a blonde at university? A  visitor.

What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs on the beach?
Sandy.

[Felldoh154]

What happens when you throw a piano down a mineshaft?
The key of a flat minor

( if you don't get it just think about it for a second )

[W0NWILL]

Two Blondes are on opposite sides of the river, "How do I get to the other side?" hollered one blonde. "You are on the other side," the other one hollered back.


So this Chinese fellow walks into a bar with a huge colorful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow", says the bartender, "where did you get that from?" "From China", answered the parrot, "they've got tons of them there!"


Why did the atheist cross the road?

To save the stranded agnostic in the middle of the road.

Why did the theist cross the road?

He was told to.


See the difference? Sorry if this offends anyone.

[Felldoh154]

What do you do if your house is surrounded by flesh eating zombies what do you do?

Hope it's Halloween

[Dannflower Reguba]

I know Chuck Norris jokes can get annoying, but I just love this one!

Jesus walked on water, Chuck Norris swam through land. 

knock knock

who's there?

Ach

Ach who?

Gesundheit

[Felldoh154]

Haha that second joke is awesome

[Rainshadow]

[Felldoh154]

Those are great

[Dannflower Reguba]

Hey! 140 MPH is okay! Just gotta get through all that other stuff first though. 

[Rainshadow]

  *Sarcastic voice*  Sure.

[Dannflower Reguba]

  *Sarcastic voice*  Sure.

I just looked at your sig..... PIPPIN IS AWESOME! 

[Rainshadow]

How did the hobbit ruin the boxing match?
He tried to destroy the ring!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Hobbit.
Hobbit who?
Hobbit letting me in?

Why did Frodo read The Lord of the Rings 50 times?
Because it was hobbit-forming!

How many quarters does it take to play the new Lord of the Rings pinball game?
None -- it only takes Tolkiens!

What is Gollum's favorite bird?
A Smea-gull!

Why was it so hard to storm Sauron's lair?
Because no matter how many you opened, there were always Mor dor!

What did Frodo say when he saw the trees dancing?
"That's ENT-ertainment!"

  I love the Lord of the Rings!