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Jokes

Started by Redwall Musician, June 25, 2011, 02:02:12 AM

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Redwall Musician

Post any dumb or funny jokes here. Keep them according to the rules of the forum.
Please note that I know a lot of dumb jokes  ;D :P. Such as:

What do you call a Roman king when he sneezes? Sneezer.

Two muffins were sitting in a oven. The first muffin said, "Is it hot in here?" The second muffin said "Aaaaa! Talking muffin!"  

..."Where courage hides within the shawdows, patience within the storms, friendship in around every corner, and inspiration just outside your window."

Mariel

If one's company, and three's a crowd, what's four and five?

Redwall Musician

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9.
..."Where courage hides within the shawdows, patience within the storms, friendship in around every corner, and inspiration just outside your window."

DanielofRedwall

Alright, not everyone will get this, but people in cricket playing nations will.

A man's wife is in labour, but he is at the other side of the world while it's happening. He wants to know what is happening, so he decides to call up the hospital. But he punches in the wrong numbers and accidentally called a man at a cricket game! So when he asked "how is it going", imagine his surprise when the man said, "Great! Six are out already, and the last one was a duck!"  ;D
Received mostly negative reviews.

Osu

@Daniel - I get it! ;D

Okay, here's a good one, here's a good one: so these two tomatoes are walking down the road, a father on the son, and the son was falling behind, so the father went back and stepped on him and said, "ketchup!"
HAHA, GET IT? KETCHUP? CATCH UP? AHAHAHAHA okay. x)
Redwall is always open, its tables laden, to you and any of good heart.


Martha Braebuck

Quote from: Osu on June 25, 2011, 02:20:33 PM
@Daniel - I get it! ;D

Okay, here's a good one, here's a good one: so these two tomatoes are walking down the road, a father on the son, and the son was falling behind, so the father went back and stepped on him and said, "ketchup!"
HAHA, GET IT? KETCHUP? CATCH UP? AHAHAHAHA okay. x)

nice one :P
~Love, •*Martha*•

Whoohahahahooh!! ~Hon Rosie's awesome laugh!

"Fate 'n fortune smile on us,
and of this crew take care,
but let no greedy robber try,
to guzzle up my share!"

Matthias720

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?


Wanna ride bikes?

Bananagirl

Quote from: Matthias720 on June 25, 2011, 05:51:02 PM
How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?


Wanna ride bikes?
LOL that is great,

how many lawyers dose it take to Chang a light bulb:



three : one to clime the ladder, one to shake the ladder, and one to sue the ladder company

Osu

Hahaha, good ones!

Okayokayokay here's another: if athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get? MISSLE TOE! BAHAHAHA!

It doesn't take much to amuse me. :I
Redwall is always open, its tables laden, to you and any of good heart.


DanielofRedwall

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.
Received mostly negative reviews.

Matthias720

How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?


One, but the light bulb has to want to change.

HeadInAnotherGalaxy

Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Déjà vu.
"Déjà vu, who?"
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Déjà vu.
"Déjà vu, who?"
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Déjà vu.
"Déjà vu, who?"
Knock Knock.
...............................
NARDOLE; You are completely out of your mind!
DOCTOR: How is that news to anyone?

"I am Yomin Carr, the harbinger of doom. I am the beginning of the end of your people!" -Yomin Carr

-Sometime later, the second mate was unexpectedly rescued by the subplot, which had been trailing a bit behind the boat (and the plot). The whole story moved along.

Matthias720

How does a jack russell terrier change a light bulb?


It inserts it as it bounces off the walls.

Redwall Musician

Knock! Knock!
Who's there?
Who.
Who, who?
Hello Mr. Owl.

Will you remember me tomorrow? Yes.
Will you remember me in a month? Yes
Will you remember me in a year? Yes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
You forgot me already?
..."Where courage hides within the shawdows, patience within the storms, friendship in around every corner, and inspiration just outside your window."

Matthias720

How do you catch a unique rabbit?

U-nique (You sneak) up on it.

How do you catch a tame one?

The 'tame (same) way.