Corrupt-a-Wish

[Tiria Wildlough]

Granted, now the rest of you is upset.
I wish that it wasn't so hot.

[Rainshadow]

  Granted, but now it's -50 degrees.  Celsius.

  I wish I could have more yummy bacon.

[psybox]

granted, the "yummy bacon" in that wish is used to mean likelihood of being brutally murdered.

i wish for something to do.

[Rainshadow]

  Granted.  Now you're doing disgusting chores.

  I wish that I could own the non-rap version of Alligator Sky.

[Buckler The Leg Buckler]

Granted, but the CD makers lied to you and there's STILL rap!

I wish that I could fly!

[Rainshadow]

  Granted.  You jump off of a cliff and fly for ten seconds before landing.  Hard.  Very hard.  Hard enough that it made a SPLAT noise.

  I wish I could have more rice and raisins.

[WarriorOfMossflower]

Granted. You have them, but you can't eat them.

I wish that Captain Jack Sparrow would find a way to achieve immortality.

[Buckler The Leg Buckler]

He just did, but you just lost your life because of him!

I wish I was a hare.

[Kitsune]

  Granted.  You jump off of a cliff and fly for ten seconds before landing.  Hard.  Very hard.  Hard enough that it made a SPLAT noise.

That made me laugh so hard!

Granted, but you would be a real hare and couldn't talk!

I wish that Rainshadow wouldn't call me Pluggy.

[Rainshadow]

  Granted, but now everyone else does! 

  I wish that I could go on vacation right now instead of during the summer.

[Martin the warrior]

Grated but something terrible happens and wreck and die before you get to the place you were headed to.
   
I wish I was a better gardener. 

[Norham Waterpaw]

You are, but all your plants just died, and the market has no more seed.

I wish that Pluggy could get a new nickname.

[Rainshadow]

  Granted, but it's worse than any previous nicknames that he's had.

  I wish that I could make a really good banner.

[Norham Waterpaw]

You just did, but a flying monkey from oz took it away and you are now the principal of your school.

I wish my room was clean

[Rainshadow]

  Granted, but an elephant then walks into your room, pretty much destroying it.

  Oh, and as a homeschooler, how would I become principal?

  I wish that I had an extra hour in my day.