The Endless Story

[Izeroth]

 But, because orcs were descended from elves, all the orcs became ridiculously weak too.

[James Gryphon]

But they were already weak, so they became strong.

[Jukka the Sling]

A very nerdy elf named Haldir suddenly discovered that pi actually equalled e = mc².

[Delthion]

And in the real world, all of Lord of the Rings was the way it turned out to be now.

[Lady Ashenwyte]

And then Father and Dante (Dante is female, by the way.) battled for control over the FMA universe.

[Izeroth]

 Unbeknownst to the two characters, they were both pawns in the collective Ledthion Hivemind's plot for multiverse domination.

[Lady Ashenwyte]

So Father transmuted Ledthion's inner organs to stone.

[Izeroth]

 Ledthion's collective consciousness was already ingrained in the fibers of the universe, so this did nothing to hinder its plan.

[rrrrr]

Ledthion got extremely mad because he was so cold.

[Delthion]

So he turned to universe into a star.

[Izeroth]

 He wished upon the star that he would become the most powerful being in the universe.

[Delthion]

And since he was the only being left in the universe his wish came true.

[Lady Amber]

But then an asteroid crashed into the star, causing it to explode, which made Ledthion's wish no longer true.

[Izeroth]

 Since all life in the universe was gone, the asteroid felt very lonely.

[Lady Amber]

So it decided to die.