The Endless Story

[Izeroth]

 The tooth fairy had already gone bankrupt, however, and there wasn't much of her kingdom left to steal.

[James Gryphon]

Then Charlie heard of a distant planet where the inhabitants' teeth regrew after being extracted.

[Lady Amber]

He realized he could become rich from this, so he sent his tooth-hunter robots to the planet.

[James Gryphon]

The planet, Orion, was guarded by a massive starship, the Guardian, which destroyed everything that entered the system with its mighty Death Ray.

[LT Sandpaw]

So using the power of a trillion nashing teeth he created his own death ray.

[Jukka the Sling]

The tooth fairy, whose name was Esta Comiendo, flew over to the beleaguered planet in hopes of rendering assistance.

[James Gryphon]

But the Guardian attacked all comers, and fired its Death Ray directly at the tooth fairy!

[Jukka the Sling]

The tooth fairy ducked.

[James Gryphon]

But the Guardian attacked with another of its terrible weapons, a unerring homing plasma torpedo, which flew straight towards the tooth fairy.

[Jukka the Sling]

She ate the torpedo. Not for nothing had she been named Esta Comiendo!

[James Gryphon]

So the Guardian used the third and final of its mighty weapons, creating an artificial black hole right next to the tooth fairy; it began to suck her in at a speed greater than light.

[Banya]

But slower than the speed at which a butter pecan ice cream cone melts under the Caribbean sun, which was incidentally where a small boy from Montana was spending his winter break with his chinchilla, Otis.

[James Gryphon]

He could only eat ice cream, jello and oatmeal because he had no teeth, courtesy of an aforementioned dentist, and his dentures hadn't come in the mail yet.

[Banya]

But, to Otis' envy, there were no limits to either the type or amount of food the boy could consume.

[James Gryphon]

The boy's gums, you see, were incredibly strong.