Overlord's Orders X

[Izeroth]

 We could of gone through the drive through, but it was manned by a ferocious three headed beast. I didn't want to take my chances. Judging by the two pistols he was carrying and the sawlike teeth that stuck out of his mouth, he was not very friendly. As for the screaming and whatnot, that was a side effect of the Metoba-Mite.

As for the overthrowing an overlord book, I later found out that Tam used my library account to check that out. I smiled when I listened to the book because the book was so stupid that it amused me. It's worth noting that Tam asked to borrow it when I was done.

As for the Metoba-Mite, I was unfamiliar with how to use it. Gryphon informed me that "if you just drink it like water then you'll be fine."

[James Gryphon]

Gryphon shook his head and sighed. "Use some common sense, man; the restaurant wouldn't have won "Best Family Dining Experience" the last five years by having a villain run the drive-thru. That so-called 'three-headed beast' was the manager, Toothy Tarryl. He carries those stun pistols to keep the store from being held up. I admit the foaming at the mouth and the gnashing of teeth might have looked a little imposing, but those are both normal, polite behaviors for his race. He's a good friend of mine, and might've given us a discount, since I'm a frequent visitor. If you had only explained your concerns, instead of just carrying on about the risks of drive-thrus, I might have set you straight. You need to learn not to judge by outward appearance."

"What you had asked me is if metabolic boosters such as Metoba-Mite could be consumed without using a needle. I said, "sure, if you just put it in your mouth, and drink it like water, then you'll be fine". I never said anything about disregarding the safe usage engraving on the front of the bottle, which says that you aren't supposed to take it all at once. If you didn't read it, well, that's not my problem. I know that you don't like to bother with little things like following instructions, but you need to always do so before taking a medicine like that."

[Tam and Martin]

OOC: Will try to post tomorrow. I will be out of town till the 6th otherwise just incase you guys are looking for me. I will still try to post though.


((EDIT)): Thanks for waiting guys! I will try to post tomorrow. (the 8th).

[Taggerung_of_Redwall]

OOC: I don't want this round to stagnate much longer. I was very busy with school and assorted things the last week. I want to post ending this round sometime tomorrow and move onto the final, so last chance for more defenses.

[Tam and Martin]

Overlord, there is clearly something that needs to be said.

First off, I will say I was not monkeying around for this reason. I was the one getting things done; Taking charge because the other two wouldn't have. Second off, I was the one who told Gryph and Izeroth to go get the book. They woudn't have done it if I didn't tell them too. Thats shows you how much of your plan they had in their brain. That is the end of that matter.

Afterwards, What Gryph claimed about me whining, I was trying to help. He apparently wasn't making much progress with the approach he took, so I tried something different. It seemed to work too, though Gryph said I was just whining because he was angry that he couldn't get Izeroth to stop just by doing it himself.

It would have been much easier for your job to be done Overlord if Gryph had just told me simply that he could speak German. It is simple thing to solve. I thought that since it was Gryph's fault for being in this mess, that he should help get us out. That is why I asked him to take care of business with the phone. I will point out that Gryph told me to hush but that didn't solve the problem. He was just acting out of anger. He did claim he tried to tell me and that I was just "Not listening" but if he really wanted to solve this problem, he would have told me right out that he could speak German like he should have done instead of beating around the block.

And, about the tomato burgers, I ordered Gryph ten of them. Why? Well, because I am a nice person and the store clerks said they would throw out the other nine they had if we didn't eat them. They gave us them FREE OF CHARGE. And, they were already made so that didn't take up any extra time and money like Gryph had said they did. It was Izeroth and Gryph in fault for the the time spent doing nothing but waste. I told gryph he could eat on the ride but he and Izeroth said they had to eat at the building and that it wouldn't be good manners to take it as take out. Also, Gryph was falsely accusing me of spitting in his food or atleast, he thought I did. His fault - Not mine.

Now, for Izzy's comment about me checking out the book, Well, it is true I did. I also checked it out at a gunpoint. Izzy told me to check it out so he could learn how to overthrow an overlord. He just told me to check it out so he could use the excuse that I had done it so he could blame me for it. Afterwards, I asked him to borrow it so I could give it back. If I didn't give it back myself, they would have fined me for it. It turned out he really was trying to overthrow you Overlord.

That is all Overlord unless my to coworkers have some more to fess up too.


OOC: I am SOOO Sorry about this guys. I had the trip to Virginia, and then I had a three day debate tournament. So sorry and I thank you guys for waiting for my indecisive self.  

[Izeroth]

 The reason I forced Tam to check the book out at gunpoint is because the Metoba-mite had chemicals which caused humans to become dillusional and irrational. I saw the warning label, but it was in Martian speak and therefore impossible for me to read. Gryphon, who knows Martian, said that the warning label was nothing to worry about. Because I was not in my right mind, Gryphon is to blame.

[James Gryphon]

OOC: This has turned into one of the longest rounds I know of (in terms of posts, not physical time).

"I wouldn't call begging other people to do the job the entire team was assigned to do while he went off to do something totally irrelevant to the mission "taking charge", but I guess everyone thinks differently. As far as getting things done, I'll grant that he did do plenty of that. It's just too bad that none of the things he got done, attempting to buy unnecessary items and causing the owner-clerk to destroy them, were helpful in completing the mission."

"I did beat on my Acme Secret-SpyGear Message Block. By then I had given up on trying to vocally tell Tam anything, because he kept interrupting and talking over me, so I thought that he might read a text message. When his spy message receiver vibrated, though, he just said "I can't read anything someone like you sends me". Maybe I was angry, but I had good reason to be. As far as eating in the building goes, I know that Izeroth loves mashing food on things, and didn't want to ruin the inside of our transport if it could be helped."

"I did say the warning label was nothing to worry about, but that was because Izeroth asked me if it -- the label, not the Metoba-Mite itself -- was toxic. He had read something about some types of label adhesive seeping into bottles and turning their contents into beaver venom. As far as the chemicals in the Metoba-Mite go, I knew it wasn't considered healthy for humans, but I didn't say as much because Tam had been bragging about how he could consume anything, and I didn't want him to drink it and have his irrational behavior harm the mission. (As it turned out, it did anyway, even without any Metoba-Mite, so I might as well have let him have at it.)"

"Instead, I told Izeroth that he'd "better ask his doctor before taking any new medication like Metoba-Mite". Of course, he ignored my sound advice, and walked off mumbling something about how "expert medical opinions can't be trusted". I assume he drank the Metoba-Mite later, as I didn't see him do it, and if I had been there I would have done my best to prevent him from drugging himself that way."

[Tam and Martin]

What Izeroth said about James having him drink the water is his business, but the point is, I had nothing to do with the checking out of the book. That being said, I will move onto the other arguments.

I was not begging James and Izeroth to do my work for me. In reality, They were standing around doing nothing but twiddling their thumbs and whistling so I gave them something to do. I trusted them to get the job done but - well - they didn't. The tomatoes would have been a totally fine thing for the mission if James and Izeroth had done what they should have. I hope you notice that Overlord.

Then, James tried to send me a text because 'I was talking over him' but really that was Izeroth's in the back round saying repeatedly "I love food! Yes I do! I love food! Yes I do!" etc.. Then he tried to send me a text but everyone knows I am not good with technological things. When my spy receiver message vibrated, it wasn't James. It was Izeroth sending me a text saying 'You should love food so we can be food buddies.' To stop him from sending anything else I said "I can't read anything someone like you sends me." I wasn't saying it to James at all. To Izeroth actually. James just thought I was saying it to him because he was already angry with me and wanted to find more fault in me. Right after that though, I did get his text. By that time though, it was unnecessary to mention because the robot had already gone away.

I was bragging about myself being able to consume anything (Which you know I am able to do due to the last few rounds) but that had NOTHING to do with this topic. I was actually on a phone call with a buddy of mine who has a superpower and he asked about mine so I told him. Me saying that had nothing to do with Izeroth's and James' needless arguing again.

I then asked the buddy of mine if he could give you a message about James and Izeroth and their arguing but he was out saving the world so he couldn't.

Unless there is more for others to confess, I am sure you can tell who is to blame.


OOC: This is a fun round.  

[Izeroth]

 
I was saying "I love food," because the robot who served us said it wouldn't serve me unless I showed some enthusiasm. The robot forced me to text the message to Tam.

I was cautious about doctors because of a bad experience I had as a child. I don't want to go into any details. Anyway, after Gryphon told me what he thought, I decided I should ask Tam what he thought. Tam claimed to be an "expert at medicine." So, Tam said it was fine, and I drank it. Afterwards, Tam claimed that "I misread the label."

[Tam and Martin]

I claimed to be an expert of medicine? No, Not at all. I claimed to be an expert of medicinefor the making of another Frankenstein though. As soon as Izeroth heard me say the fist part, he didn't bother to listen to the rest. I told him it was fine but For the making of a Frankestein, yes it was. Not for human consumption. Before I could tell him it wasn't safe for himself, he had already downed it all. Later, he blamed me for his faults by saying 'I mislead him'. I tried to explain to him that he wasn't listening (And I will note, James was taking his side saying "Izeroth is always right") and that I tried to tell him it wasn't safe but he wouldn't listen and kept on chattering on about how he was perfect and all. Lastly, I told him he mislead the label so he would stop speaking so I could explain the truth but that didn't stop him. I then decided just to leave it and get us back to you, Overlord.

[Taggerung_of_Redwall]

"Well then gentlemen, I do believe I have heard enough. It is immensely clear that all of you continue to be failures, but you likely already knew I was going to say that. Anyway, there's something that has come up. Two things, in fact. But both are only for two sets of ears of servants to hear. Izeroth, your services are being dispensed with. Go to your quarters, grab some things, I don't care if they're yours or not, just get some of that junk in the servants' section of the space platform out of my domain. Get on a transport and leave after that, I guess. Unless you can just swim through space to leave. I don't care. Just leave."

Izeroth's feet were unsealed and he quickly left the Overlord's presence and then the station. Oddly, no transports left when he did.

~~~

The two servants were back in the Overlord's chamber two hours later. There was a squash on one of the steps leading into his chamber. Other than that, it was the same as it always had been. Plus a new air of foreboding. The Overlord expected that was the result of a change in the breathing pattern of  the Ice Penguin species. He had no idea where the squash came from. The Overlord addressed his two remaining servants.

"You see, I have some very important business to attend to at once. A shame really, since I only just moved in to this place. As much as I hate to say it, and as ironic as it will be considering that one guy from a couple weeks ago, I just don't like the idea of leaving this base alone for any poacher to come along and nab as he likes. I intend on entrusting my role to one of you two as long as it is necessary. Which one? Well, there is a task I dared not entrust to too large a group given its sensitive and stealthy nature. Just two servants is ideal.

"The task is as follows: A certain clepsydra salesman has been making the rounds across the local cluster of galaxies. This is a problem for a horologist friend of mine as you'll see, and I need to do that friend a favor. You see, this salesman's reputation as a master in his profession is fully deserved. He's sold many clepsydras over the years. I have it on good authority that his next stop will be at a library in this very solar system, located on the moon of the third planet. The librarians there number thirty and are a section of the universe's greatest librarian corps. They are scorpion-people, you see. Not much taller than you and rather humanoid, and also dressed more like monks with their long, brown habits, but scorpion librarians nonetheless. They are born and bred for the sole purpose of taking care of and organizing the universe's most important books. They are also using an outdated atomic clock manufactured by the same organization my horologist friend works for. It is imperative they continue to use this atomic clock for very complicated and very important reasons and not buy a clepsydra from this salesman. As such, you must prevent this salesman from arriving at the library and making a sale. Take one of my transports and arrive outside the library at the time the scorpion librarians are taking their tea. The salesman will arrive outside the library exactly as they are finishing tea, so make sure to stop him with his clepsydras before he makes contact with the librarians.  I don't want him harmed and that's too complicated to do anyway, so just steal the last three clepsydras he has and bring them back here with you, leaving him with no reason to meet any librarian. The librarians will have nothing to buy, and they will continue to use the horrifically rigged atomic clock as they're supposed to be doing. Oh, and the salesman has a laser gun. Be sure to avoid getting hit by that. And don't get a librarian hit. I actually rather like those lot and am glad to have them as neighbors. So, all you  have to do is get there on time, steal from a salesman, don't get killed, don't get librarians hurt, avoid causing the death of a salesman and bring me three clepsydras. And be back before I need to leave. This is a time sensitive mission, afterall."


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James Gryphon and Tam entered the Overlord's chamber. They took up positions in front of him, and became locked to the floor. The Overlord spoke.

"No clepsydras, two servants. There are two problems here. And unfortunately, I can only remedy one of them. Now, one of you begin explaining why I'll still have a problem here at the end of the day."

[James Gryphon]

Gryphon frowned as he manipulated a data pad. "I had meant to show you this recording of the unfortunate events, but apparently it has been wiped. Either sabotage or a software glitch; we had plenty of the latter. With the absence of a log, I suppose I will have to tell you what happened vocally."

"We got to the transport, Tam taking over as pilot, myself as copilot and computer operator, the same setup we had successfully done before. The moment we had strapped in, though, Tam said that I needed to update the ship's navigation software. He said that they had just released a new version and that we should use it because newer software is always better. I had known about the update, but put off doing it because the company is notorious for making software releases that are ridden with bugs. It usually takes a few months and two or three patches before they get it right. Besides, updating software normally takes ages, time I knew we didn't have. I tried to explain this to Tam, but he just said "Shut up, you don't know what you're talking about. Bugs are really undocumented features. Anyway, even if it has problems, it is newer, so it is still better." Then he pulled out a laser gun and said, "I'm installing this whether you like it or not. Stay out of my way and maybe I won't shoot you."

"Well, the attempt at downloading the update took up about half of our time. Tam impatiently drummed his fingers on the controls, periodically deleting important backups and system files to unnecessarily "clear up computer space", against my recommendations. Then he finally decided, "This is taking too long, let's just quit it and go". I tried to stop him, but he cancelled the update. The computer then crashed, with a purple screen of death, indicating there was no longer sufficient files available to run the operating system. In other words, we no longer had any navigation capability."

"I said that we should go and pick up a backup set of discs to run the computer with, so that we could at least have basic navigation, but Tam said, "Forget it; I know everything we need anyway." Then he blasted us off, skipping all of the ship's safety checks, and took off to where he thought our destination was at a speed greater than our maximum safe level."

"Well, surprisingly, Tam actually did eventually get us to where we were supposed to go, and I'll give him credit for that. Unfortunately, we were a full day late. Our target had come and gone. Tam screamed and raged about how our failure was "all my fault", then went into his quarters and banged his head against the wall until he was knocked out."

"With him being obviously deranged, I took control of the ship, and used my recording of our trip to calculate a return course. We got here without further incident. Tam then tried to say that it was too dangerous to come back to you, and that we should steal the transport and leave servitude behind, but I refused, and when he grew violent, I locked the controls down to prevent him from interfering. So he sulkily told me that "at least he'd have time to make something up about me" before we got here. I docked the ship, and here we are. I have no idea why Tam seemed determined to make us fail the mission the way he did, but I trust in your majesty's ability to discern the cause."

[Tam and Martin]

Ah, the software, yes I remember that incident - Gryphon trying to stop me from getting new software that would help us get to the library faster. Let me explain.

You see, we were getting ready to go, As Gryph said, and I took over as pilot and he as copilot as it had worked well before. Then I went to work uploading the new software for the machine. Gryph immediately tried to stop me from doing such. Now, Gryphon said the company is notorious for making software ridden with bugs, but, I know about this company because I used to work for them. They do make most of their software with bugs but, because I used to work for them, They give me special access to their new features. I looked into this product and found it doesn't carry bugs, it only takes 1 minute to update, and that it is completely safe.

Seeing as Gryphon doesn't get this information, he didn't know that this version was safe. I tried to tell him it was perfectly fine but then, something I never thought he would ever do, happened. HE pulled out a laser gun and told me not to do it, or he would shoot me. That is when my karate class came in handy. I won't go into detail but I was able to take the gun from him and told him not to make any funny moves. I also said, "Stay out of my way and I won't shoot you" because he had just threatened me before.

Also, I will mention I did say that "Newer software is always better" but, He probably did not hear me say the rest of my sentence. What I really said was "Newer software is always better - For this ship". The end part he did not bother to say though. Gryph also claimed I said "Bugs are an undocumented feature" Which I did, but i wasn't saying that directed towards the ship, but directed to the ant I had just mushed on the floor. He did not realize this though.

On a side note, I did try to explain what I was doing to Gryph, but he was mad that I took his gun so he turned the song "You are my sunshine" on on the radio and blared the bass of the radio. I couldn't even hear myself. I was finally able to update the software and we were on our way - Or so I thought.





*Editing - Please do not post yet - Will try to finish later today*

[Tam and Martin]

I am sorry but, as Tagg will tell you, I have to drop out. Enjoy the next round everyone!

Tam

[Taggerung_of_Redwall]

"Now then, I think it is immensely clear which of you shall have the honor of getting something of a job as an Overlord-ish thing. And I really must be off at once to my transport."
The Overlord jumped off his chair and left through the back door of the chamber, seeming to have simply forgotten to name a winner. His footsteps receded down the corridor and the doors to the chamber closed. James Gryphon and Tam starred at each other for a moment, then looked to the Overlord's empty chair. Then, the chair disappeared in a fizzle of energy and faint blue light. It was another twenty-five minutes before the intercom in the chamber sputtered and the voice of the Overlord spoke to the servants, not sounding very chipper.

"That chair did not belong to the platform and so I take it with me, with a few other odds and ends I brought. I'll be leaving momentarily. The last item I teleport will be the final servant to be removed from the platform and I'll put him...uh, I'm not sure. But regardless, take it as a sign of your being chosen if you're the remaining servant."
A moment passed and another fizzle of blue energy occurred and James Gryphon was left standing alone in the chamber. In a minute he was on the observation deck, and could see the Overlord's transport disappear in a vortex as he left to attend to an urgent piece of business.

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Well, that concludes the round. Good job everyone who participated, and thank you!
James Gryphon has the next round, and I'd imagine he'll be getting that up shortly.

Any thoughts?