Overlord's Orders XI

[Søren]

Your highness, though it may appear otherwise, I was not "flirting" with the officials. I was trying to convince them to let me examine the footage they had taken of LT,  who had been filmed initially conversing with a woman in a helicopter pilot suit. It was for this reason that I tried to recover the footage, even though I was filmed in the process. Your lordship, we do all for your well being and out of your kindness! Please forgive us!

[The Mask]

YOU BLASTED WORMS!!!! Not you of course my lord. What these WORMS say is partially true. I did take all those photos of the toilet. But it was very clean and shiny! I did not however give Taggerung of Redwall any gems of any kind, I give him but a simple piece of dung. You must believe me, not these WORMS!! Also, I should mention, ToR took the rest of the pictures in exchange for the dungball.

[Delthion]

This is true, most supreme lordship, but it was Soren who had taken the gems from the Tagg. Taggerung must have made a team with Soren in order to confiscate the gems! I was then forced to push him down t5he stairs in an attempt to retrieve the gems. But once I did and went to him to get the gems, they were nowhere to be found.

[Søren]

Your mighty lordship, it is true I took the gems from Tagg, but it was not a deal between us. But because I needed to draw the dragon away from the hotel. In an effort to preserve the mission,  I ran to a nearby creek and threw the gems in. However, LT was following me, and I belligerent he took the gems from the creek and back to the hotel. This caused the dragon to turn his attention to the hotel, after which he attacked it.

[Delthion]

When the hotel was destroyed, only LT was responsible for the destruction done to the Hotel, I tried to smash him to the side with a sledgehammer, but he ran on. Then when the dragon turned and dove on him, LT hurled the gems onto the roof of the hotel in fear for his life, he then duck and hid under a bush allowing the dragon to destroy the hotel.

[LT Sandpaw]

Its true that I retrieved the gem from the creek your lordship, I was trying to save the hotel by drawing the dragon further away. But when I was trying to escape away from the hotel Delthion went crazy and tried to kill me with a sledge hammer. I ran but the only way to run was back to the hotel. After the dragon had melted the hotel I realized that Soren had stolen back the gem while I was dodging Delthion who was jeopardizing the mission by forcing me towards the hotel.

[Delthion]

OOC: But it already states that you were running towards the hotel when I tried to smash you to the side with a sledgehammer.

[LT Sandpaw]

OOC: I don't think it does it only says I was at the hotel causing it to be melted and then you were trying to kill me with a sledge hammer, I don't think it ever said I was running originally towards the hotel.

[Delthion]

OOC:

Your mighty lordship, it is true I took the gems from Tagg, but it was not a deal between us. But because I needed to draw the dragon away from the hotel. In an effort to preserve the mission,  I ran to a nearby creek and threw the gems in. However, LT was following me, and I belligerent he took the gems from the creek and back to the hotel. This caused the dragon to turn his attention to the hotel, after which he attacked it.

[LT Sandpaw]

OOC: Back to the hotel because you were attacking me with a sledge hammer. He left that part out.

[Søren]

OOC: No I didnt. Your supposed to be a theif.
Your lordship, the reason I re-took the gem was not only to draw the dragon away from any trace that could be led back to you, but also to save them from Tagg, who was attempting to take the items he coveted, the gems.

[James Gryphon]

OOC: If there's a severe discrepancy, I'd prefer that y'all sort it out through PMs. Creating a bunch of posts like this clutters up the topic.

---

"If nothing else, I can see that this trip didn't go anywhere towards drawing you closer as a team. The backbiting and contradictions here are pathetic. I can see that my money on all of those "Leading Through the Magic of Friendship" books was wasted."

"I guess I'll just have to go back to what I know works. If perks don't get it done, fear will draw you together... fear of what will happen if you fail me, which you have so miserably done here. I'll tell you flat out now: one of you is not going to be leaving this room the same way that you came in. You can beg and grovel as much as you like, but I find it annoying, not ingratiating, and it will not help you escape punishment."

"The claims against Taggerung_of_Redwall are numerous. I would prefer for him to give his account of the situation, but I'm willing to hear from anyone who is willing to shed some light on why he took the actions he apparently did. After that is cleared up, I will decide which of you should be disposed of."

[Jasper]

Jasper looked around at his companions. None of them seemed keen to defend Tagg, likely because it was clear the dire consequences would be carried out on the one deemed ultimately responsible for the failure. Tagg himself seemed to be in a silent trance, likely induced by pure fear of the staggering penalties James was alluding to. Jasper decided someone may as well give the side of the story Tagg had revealed on the ride back to base. He stepped forward:

Oh great overlord, Tagg informed me of his explanations not long ago, on the ride back to your domain. His health seemed to be deteriorating, so I recorded it on this: *Pulls out a small device and turns it on. A hologram appears of an earlier version of Tagg*

*The hologram of Tagg:* "Oh great overlord, it is true that I stole the gem, but it was necessary under the circumstances. You see, in the hotel I noticed that Mask was taking an incredible amount of pictures of the toilet alone. I figured over the trip he might have taken billions of them. This was alright thanks to the admirable storage capacity of the camera, but later Jasper and another one of these bumbling blockheads smashed the cameras by the mistake mentioned earlier. Sam wasted little time in emailing the entire storage of the cameras straight to you great overlord. I am well versed in email, since I own one myself, and realized the storage capacity would be too much for the regular email plan, and would cost millions to fix.

I asked around about how we may earn some more cash to compensate you, when Mask informed me that there was an old abandoned mine in the northwest. He told me nothing of the ferocious Dragon that lived there. I journeyed to the mine and found the gem unguarded in the open. I took it back to the hotel, not realizing a dragon was stalking me on the way back. When I got there, it roared and attacked. Although some of these servants mention me trading off the gem in some sort of imaginary dark scheme, I was merely trying to keep us all alive by changing the target the Dragon was after. (If a single servant had kept the gem, he would surely have been roasted alive.) After that it was a mad game of hot potato, with dire consequences for the loser. Some of the servants did not immediately see the Dragon, and that accounts for the odd things they claim to have seen me do with the gem.

Earlier Mask mentioned me taking pictures in exchange for dung. This is clearly misled, I had no want or desire for this disgusting material, and merely grabbed it so that his hands were free to take the gem when the dragon was hot on our heels. As for the photos I supposedly took in exchange for it, that was merely me taking a picture of the raging Dragon to show that it was not us, but the Dragon that melted the entire hotel. Please understand, great overlord, that it was not my doing that this mission went the way it did!"

*hologram fades*

OOC: If tagg comes he can edit my post, or write a new one if he likes. Anything works for me, I just wrote this to keep the game going on the admirable pace it has been at thus far. I've never been in such an active and enjoyable roleplay 

[James Gryphon]

"I've heard enough. You have been unbelievably incompetent -- all you had to do was nothing! I'm tempted to destroy all of you, but my robotic servants' Chameleon programs are glitched right now. I can't use them for undercover work, so I have to keep some of you around until my objectives here are complete."

"The purpose here is to build an effective team. One of you does not fit in with my vision. He is the one who will be punished. Watch and learn from his most fascinating fate."

A previously hidden spotlight shone down on The Mask's glass capsule. A robotic arm suddenly lowered from inside the capsule's ceiling, and grabbed The Mask, holding him in position. A second arm came down with a large hypodermic needle and began injecting the unfortunate servant in several places.

The effect was immediate. White hair began to spring up all across The Mask's body. The other servants winced as several sickening cracks and pops came from the direction of the lit capsule. The Mask's body changed and transformed, bones and flesh molding and changing, until -- !

The Overlord spoke.

"Yes, what you see before you is a gorilla. An albino gorilla, to be precise. I decided that this was an appropriate punishment, considering his recent behavior. This bizarre fascination with a toilet is unseemly for any human servant of mine. While it could have been forgiven if he was helpful, he in fact did nothing to salvage the situation. Trust me when I say that he will be far more useful in his current state than he ever would have been working with you."

"I have some unfinished business to conduct in this time, but it does not concern any of you. Instead, you will be going a few years into the future, to meet up with some old friends of mine."

"The teleporter will take you near a city called Cupertino, in the old state of California. An agent I have on the ground, Max Marcos, will greet you there and assist you throughout this mission. I cannot beam you directly to your destination due to the fact that it is a frequented area, and your abrupt appearance there would be noticed, so he will also assist you in finding appropriate transportation to the meeting place. You're to talk with the Death-Defying Beavers that are there and pick up the "Omega Six" package. They will know what I'm asking for. Get to the destination, get the package, bring it back safely, and don't cause a scene."

---
A few hours later...

"I'm not quite sure how you manage it. No package anywhere in sight. An expenditure from my account for a $5000 bribe to a Mr. Tim Amack, an ex-bus driver. The prolonged kidnapping of a girl who was a passenger on a bus. Finally, a Death-Defying Beaver Battle Saucer appeared in a nearby part of the city and started blowing things up. Do you have any idea how many people are going to have to have their memories wiped to avoid contaminating the timeline?"

"I had a solemn promise from the Beavers, who never break their word, to avoid interfering with this planet unless their presence was requested. So I surmise you boneheads did meet with the beavers, and somehow inspired them to perform this act of mayhem. Why, and what happened to my package? Why the bribe? And what's with this taking a captive and hiding out in the woods with her? What does "do not cause a scene" mean to you fools, anyway? I'm not talking about film-making!"

"Start talking. If you're lucky maybe I'll only vaporize one of you."

[Søren]

Your mighty lordship, I'm afraid I don't know much about the events during our mission. But I'll tell you what I do know.
We teleported down to the surface, and as soon as we made it to the city of Cupertino, we went to see your agent, Mr. Marcos. He instructed us to get in the back of a van, while he made arrangements for us to have minimal contact, in an effort not to disrupt the timeline. After 15 minutes of waiting, he returned, and got us out from the van. However, as soon as I stepped out, I was hit on the head, and fell unconscious. When I came too, I was tied to a bus seat near the back. I had a towel in my mouth, preventing me from speaking. I had my limbs tied up, which prevented me from moving. I noticed a girl tied up in the back of the bus with me. But she was still unconscious. I saw someone who looked like Tagg hand the driver an envelope, and then walk out of the bus. The bus driver came to the back of the bus and knocked me unconscious again.
When I came too a second time, the bus was on its side. The girl was gone, as was the driver. I had fallen from my ##:1162 and I climbed out of the burning bus, only to see a Death Defying Beaver saucer destroy the building next to me. I searched for what seemed like hours, looking for my team members or Mr. Marcos. I couldn't find the , or the package.