For when you don't PSOT

[Dannflower Reguba]

*sigh* Fine then.

As a warning, Dan, Ash may not read that as you intended it. I understand your desire to have him see things through your eyes, but perhaps it may be wise to read through all this through his first.

I'm the least biased available party at the moment, and I've already considered the different viewpoints that I can fairly judge. Everything I've said has been with the best interest of everyone in mind. I also happen to know a couple of things that I don't think either of you are aware of. Granted, I'm not as familiar with the situation with Del, but going of off the responses was more than enough to get a solid enough basis to speak on.

Why are you dragging this out?

It takes two to argue. Don't try to blame shift.

I don't think I'm bloating it.

Snowflake and sulkfest are about as weak as "insulting" terms go, so making this level of an issue out of it is easily bloating.

And you can't tell me to go somewhere else and not defend myself while still saying things against me.

1.) I just did
2.) This piece of advice comes from personal experience. Stopping to gather clarity after reading something that has, in some way, upset you isn't just good, it's vital to formulating any response worth reading. Failure to maintain control is the surest way to continue adding to the problem instead of finding the solution.

If I (non-jokingly) called Del a name he'd have the right to be mad, if in his eyes it was uncalled for.

So if I'm offended by the mere use of the word, "pickle," should everyone else around me stop using it? Making an individual's interpretation the responsibility of the speaker is a dangerous game that I guarantee you don't want to play. This particular issue might have been different under the case of culture, but that's not the case, and is a separate matter entirely.

Don't know how many times I must say I didn't mean harm in order to get that accepted by you people.

Immediate hypocrisy followed by a very unnecessary and traditionally aggressive, "you people," statement.

And like I said before: if I did harm, which I obviously accidentally did, it was you guys' interpretation of what I said, not what I meant.

Excusing self from that which others are being accused (IE: Immediate hypocrisy version 2).

and I don't see why it's so bad to ask for an apology to that.

Because demanding an apology is rude and pretentious.

Please stop beating me up over something I didn't intend.

Intended or not, the consequences of what you've posted here have been highly predictable, and thus, avoidable. The very fact that this topic exists (*looks at title and OP*), is an open invitation for exactly what has transpired.

       Hopefully this will be my last interaction with this topic. I have no intention of returning to, much less responding to anything else here. I offered my advice, but it's become apparent that it is unwelcome. I hope that anyone who does stick around can come to some accord in here, and that no one takes the drama elsewhere.

[Ashleg]

Would go through and counter that for the people left reading, but I'm exhausted. As for the pickle example, I never said that. Being offended by a word is different from not liking being insulted.

I don't care to defend myself anymore-- it's apparently hypocritical to do that. I even apologized. Nothing I say will slide. Rosie and Tumbler and a few other people who are wisely not involved can testify that this is how I joke.

(And me being passive-aggressive now, Dan, is just what's going to come of all of this, because nobody is listening to me saying I meant no harm. Of course I'm fed up.)

Anyone who cares to PM me may.

Enjoy.

[Maudie]

Step 1: Say you're sorry.
     Apologizing should always be the main focus of apologies. They shouldn't dwell on the wrongdoings, they should simply express remorse. The purpose of apologies is to mend human relationships, and rehashing grievances won't help.

Step 2: Take responsibility for your actions.
     Instead of blaming the other person for being too sensitive or easily offended, you should acknowledge your own role in them being hurt. It takes two to tango, so chances are that all parties involved are at least a little bit in the wrong. Acknowledging your personal role in offending someone is invaluable in trying to mend a relationship because it shows that you know that some of it was on you. A simple "I'm sorry for saying that" should suffice.

Step 3: Try to make amends.
     Offer to do something to remedy the situation, if necessary. How can you make it up to them?

Step 4: Promise you won't do it again, and actually try not to do it again.
     Apologies are meaningless if you have to keep making the same ones over and over again. The best way to mend the relationship is to try to avoid making the same mistake in the future.

I think all y'all would benefit from just trying to stop arguing and actually taking some time to try and mend these relationships. I've made this handy little guide to apologizing just for you. Don't let a stupid little argument ruin your mood or your relationships. Everyone involved in an argument should apologize if they ever hope to end it. If there's anything that you guys really need to hash out, maybe it should be settled peacefully and respectfully over PMs.

*DISCLAIMER* Those who use Mad Maudie's Guide on How to Apologize™ may find that their relationships with other people improve greatly and may suffer from personal responsibility. If you have any doubt about whether you should use this product, please consult with your conscience.

I always hate interfering with these types of arguments, but honestly I believe y'all are mature people who really just need a nudge in the right direction sometimes. If this post seems cheesy and nosy, feel free to disregard.

[Ashleg]

No, no, you're good- I'm working it out with Del, I think we're good.

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

Gettin' back tae ze topic...

'ere ve gae gazerin' Nutz in May...

[The Skarzs]

*Throws green nuts at Head.*

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

*Duckz und zen gazerz ze Green Nutz*

[Ashleg]

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

Vot aboot Lionz zleepin' taenoight? ....Or nae......

[Matthias720]

Things seem to have cooled down. Request for a lock granted.

And if anyone needs to talk about any of this with a staff member, our PM boxes are open.

*click*