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I dare you... to hit paste in the replies.

Started by SilentSam, December 02, 2014, 09:55:37 PM

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One-Eye the wildcat

#900
[Threeclaw sighed in contentment as he stepped foot into the meagre shelter of the frozen ruins. It was not much hotter within the dilapidated fortress- but it certainly beat becoming a snowbeast.

"Back off, vermin!" A voice growled, followed by a squirrel armed with a claymore. "This is my shelter!"

Threeclaw gave the claymore and it's wielder a look of unworried disdain. Crossing his paws the stoat smirked. "This is a grand palace squirrel. I don't see why two beasts can't share."

Elmblade gave Threeclaws a scoff. "Ha! Ye'd probably try tae rob me blind!"

"I wouldn't rob you blind." The stoat said with a lazy roll of his eyes. "Are you saying I have l'aire d'un voleur?"

"What did ye jus' say?" Elmblade asked, his voice dangerously calm. "Did ye jus' insult me?"

Another fool with no knowledge of the finer tongues. "That's not what I said. What I did say is not really your business though is it? It's a big castle squirrel, go find some tree to climb."

"That's it!" Elmblade pointed his claymore at the vermin. "If ye don't get out o' 'ere right now, I'll be forced tae make ye leave!"

Threeclaw yawned and drew his rapier. "Comme vous voulez. But just remember when you're freezing your big bushy tail off outside that this is entirely your fault."

Elmblade gave a nod. "As ye wish." The squirrel suddenly jumped to the side and grabbed a longbow that was lying next to him by his pack. Drawing it back, an arrow notched and ready, he growled, "I didn't want tae 'ave tae do this." Then, he released the arrow.

Threeclaw stepped backwards suddenly, watching as the arrow sailed past him. Without a moment's pause the stoat shot forwards on nimble feet- numb though the cold had made them.

Mumbling under his breath, Elmblade quickly unstrung the bow and held it in both paws like a staff. Maybe I won't have to kill him, He thought. But I'll keep my claymore close, just in case.

Threeclaw began by feinting a low slash for the squirrel's footpaws

Elmblade tried to jump up as the vermin's blade slashed at his footpaws. Unfortunately, the cold had made the squirrel slower than usual and he got a painful nick in the leg. Using the unstrung bow like a staff, he swung it at Threeclaw's head

The stoat flattened his ears as the staff flew overhead, but withdrew swiftly, recoiling like a snake, his rapier a blur of flashing steel.

Elmblade had never fought an opponent this skilled in a while. I might just have to use that claymore, He mused to himself, blocking the vermin's blows. This fight would be a different story if I didn't have this thing as a weapon. He gave a powerful lunge at Threeclaws.

Threeclaw parried the blow, but it made his blade shake like a rung bell and forced the stoat backwards, lest he lose more ground.

Elmblade glanced past the stoat and saw the steep ditch that was just behind the vermin. He started raining blows on Threeclaws, hopefully he would be able to drive him into the ditch.

Threeclaw too had noticed the ditch, and had done so upon entering (it was rather hard to miss) and was desperate to avoid it. Suddenly he tossed his rapier into his other paw, and slashed at the squirrel for this new angle of attack.

The squirrel was taken by surprise at Threeclaw's change of tactic. As he blocked the stoat's swings Elmblade quickly decided that he wasn't going to be able to beat this vermin with only a wooden pole very easily. Jumping back, he swung out his claymore and charged furiously.

The stoat watched the squirrel come towards him, now dual-weilding the pole and claymore. He waited patiently until the last second, before swiftly flattening himself against the side of the wall, letting the squirrel pass by him- and over his outstretched leg!

Elmblade leapt over Threeclaw's outstretched leg and landed on the ground in between the ditch and the stoat. He's sure a crafty fellow I'll give him that. Elmblade knew he had to get away from the ditch fast. Reaching down, he picked up a handful of dirt and threw it into the vermin's eye.

Threeclaw had not expected the dirt- most woodlanders fought fair, but then again, this one was ever-so-slightly above the average woodlander. Of course, the dirt did nothing to stop the flat of his rapier connecting heavily with the squirrel's rump.

"Ouch! Why you!" Elmblade jumped forward and stomped on the stoat's tail.

"Touche." Once more the stoat retreated- though thankfully he was now facing the ditch. His rapier darted forwards like a sprung coil.

Elmblade blocked the blows and thrust a few counter attacks of his own. Hopefully he would be able to use one of the moves that his father had taught him to disarm this insulting vermin.

Threeclaws continued to parry, swapping constantly from defensive to offensive movements. He aimed for the face, then the chest, the leg, the left paw and so on and so forth.

Elmblade had now dueled with Threeclaws long enough to where he had learned what most of the vermin's moves were. Blocking and hacking the squirrel continued to fight. He would never give up! Though he had to admit, it felt rather good to fight a challenging opponent.

Threeclaws was beginning to get bored. He had been travel-weary since the beginning and the squirrel's unprovoked antagonism had done nothing to replenish his energy. He'd warmed up at least... So, continuously parrying and jabbing as necessary, the stoat struck up a conversation. "So what exactly is your nom?"

"Oh well it's probably- Hey! Jus' what are ye trying tae do? Are ye trying tae distract me?!"

This one is very unfriendly... "Je suis demande your name. You see fighting can get, oh- so- repeating."

"Aye, that's true..." My name is Elmblade, what's ye'rs?" He asked, ready to block and of the vermin's blows in case this was just a trick.

Smirking at the squirrel's sudden look of surprise, the stoat pointed the tip of his rapier down and waved his three-clawed paw. "You have troi guesses."

Elmblade slowly let his claymore at ease. "Hmm... Threeclaw?"

"Muy bien." The stoat's rapier shot back up as fast as lightning, and dived towards the squirrel's paw.

Hmm... Figured as much, the squirrel grinned to himself, Just when you think vermin aren't that bad.... Blocking the blow with ease, he swung his unstrung bow in a sideways sweep.

Threeclaw hopped over the sweeping blow, simultaneously lunging at his opponent. "So, who taught you how to fight?"

"Mae father's best friend." The squirrel replied. A dangerous glint appeared in his eyes as he added, "He was killed in an ambush by vermin."
"Who taught ye?"

Momentarily Threeclaw's grin became a sad sort of frown. It lasted for about half a second. "Nobeast important. For all I know a badger killed them."

"Oh, I'm sorry tae hear that. Who was the badger?" While they were talking, Elmblade had been slowly forcing the stoat toward the back of a stone wall.

"How am I supposed to know?" Threeclaw snapped. He never should have started this conversation, and now the squirrel was trying to trap him again...

Elmblade smiled to himself as they got closer and closer to the wall. "Where did ye grow up?"

"Somewhere hot." The stoat lied, suddenly swapping paws again, to lunge from the left

Hmm... That move again, eh? Elmblade thought as he tried to block the blow.

But the blow was more distraction than attack, and Threeclaw brought his footpaw down on the squirrel's

Elmblade grunted with pain as his footpaw was hit. "That's it! Time to end this!" Leaping forward, he barreled into the vermin, both losing their weapons in the process.

Threeclaw was surprised by the sudden change in tactic. Was the squirrel enraged by the thought of hot places?

Elmblade punched Threeclaws hard in the face with both of his paws. Maybe if I could knock him out we could end this with no blood shed...

Threeclaw tucked in his feetpaws and rolled backwards- kicking the squirrel off of him.

Elmblade rolled over as he landed. Jumping up, he leapt back onto the vermin, grabbing him by the throat.

Threeclaws claws slashed viciously at the squirrel's paws. Some determined woodlander. All I wanted was some shelter... not like he owns this ruin.

All I wanted was to rest in peace and warmth for one night. One night! That was all I wanted! Grabbing a rock, he bashed Threeclaws on the shoulder. If only this vermin would give up. I hope I don't have to kill him...

Threeclaw slipped out of the squirrel's grip and drew backwards, snarling- his sharp teeth glinting in the half-light.

Elmblade rubbed the wounds on his paw. This vermin is a dirty fighter. Crouching down, he waited for the vermin's next move.

Threeclaw waited patiently for the squirrel to strike, surveying the terrain and searching for his rapier.=

Elmblade saw the vermin's eyes dart around for a weapon. He barreled into Threeclaw, yelling on the top of his lungs, "JUS' SURRENDER ALREADY!"

The stoat brought his claws up and around the squirrel's throat
"You attacked me, do not be expecting me to surrender!"

"Ye tried tae steal mae shelter! Back off!" He headbutted the vermin in the face and tried to lock him in a hold.

"You woodlanders." The stoat hissed, repeatedly kicking his opponent's unprotected stomach. "It's a whole castle. How can it possibly belong to vous?"

"I didn't need th' whole castle! Ye jus' came up an' tried tae steal the cave where I had jus' finished setting up camp!" He spat, throwing the stoat to the ground.

"I walked into a ruin." Threeclaw rolled back to his feetpaws. "Not your camp."

"The ruins are my camp."

"And where." The stoat demanded. "Is that ecrit?"

"Let's jus' say it's my destiny tae be here then. Etched in stone, 'this is Elmblade's camp.' Happy?!"

The stoat crossed his paws. "You seem to enjoy looking for trouble with that kind of attitude..."

"Hmp! Well ye weren't exactly 'elping either."

"Blaming the victim." Threeclaw shook his head in disgust. "You woodlanders have no honour."

Ye're one tae talk," Elmblade shot back. "But if ye want, we could both drop our weapons 'n' settle this like two mature beasts?"

Threeclaw stared at him through a face so deadpanned... it resembled a dead pan. (In fact it looked like this '-.-') "We are both already disarmed."

"I meant any weapons that ye've got on ye, like any 'idden daggers that ye have or anything like that." Elmblade said, shaking his head. Did the vermin actually think he was that dumb?

"Are you asking me to saw my claws off, because if that is being the case I'd rather keep fighting."

"Hmm...that's actually not a bad idea! Let me help ye saw 'em off." Elmblade began to walk forward.

Threeclaw snarled and bared his fangs. "Shave my claws and I'll shave your tail."

Elmblade waved his paw dismissively. "Ach! I was kidding! Honestly, can't ye take a joke?"

"I was joking too. I'd have chewed your tail off." Threeclaw crossed his paws over his chest. "Anyhow it's hard to tell when somebeast is joking when they attacked you for no reason only moments ago."

Elmblade shook his head and let out a tired sigh. "Look, I only attacked ye because ye wouldn't leave mae camp. An' besides, this place around 'ere is known for its population o' thieves and cutthroats."

"Hitting first and asking after? You are sounding like an especially stupid squirrel." Threeclaw slid down against a wall, until he was sitting at it's foot.

Elmblade couldn't help but chuckle. "Aye. But only sometimes." The squirrel also sat down, but made sure his paw was close to a rock, just in case. "It's freezing out 'ere. We should decide what we're gonna do quickly afore one o' us dies of cold."

"Make a fire. I don't suppose you found any wood?"
Threeclaw smirked. "It is your camp aftre all."

"Yes it is," Elmblade replied, a smirk also forming on his face. "That's why ye should collect some more wood while I start a fire wit' what I already found."

"There's some in the ditch already." Threeclaw reclined slightly, his eyes already half-shut.

"Then I guess ye'd better go get it," Elmblade replied. "Or we'll run out."

The only thing coming from the stoats form, was the sound of a soft snoring.

Elmblade merely let a sigh.The world was full of crazy creatures...

Fin.

A/N

I do not own this sequence or the characters. Elmblade belongs to Sebias of Redwall, And Threeclaws belongs to The Grey Coincidence. This was completed on Discord.

R&R, and Au revoir, mes amis!]
I was uploading a fanfic :p
"What will become of us? Where will we go, we who wander this vast wasteland in search of our better selves?"

"Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos."
Long live the RRR!!


Tungro

Might be good to put it in a spoiler so it is not that big

Kreg

Spoiler

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You can't spell low IQ without a lot of boogaly (boo-ga-lee)

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OooooOOooo, shiny!

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But I constantly have to look over my stuff, and make sure it's the way I want it, worded correctly, all of that and such
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Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

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"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

Sebias of Redwall



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"I can only speak two languages. English and rubbish." ~Brian Jacques <br /><br />"No half-heartedness and no worldly fear must turn us aside from following the light unflinchingly." <br /><br />"Evil labours with vast power and perpetual success - in vain: preparing always only the soil for unexpected good to sprout in."<br /><br />~JRR Tolkien<br /><br />Long live the RRR!

Jack the Quick

Spoiler
ferret, the corsair Captain of the ship Bloodlust, stared back at the land he had just left. The southern lands of plenty, full of woodlanders long gone soft. Turning around, the evil-looking ferret turned to look at what remained of his fleet. At the moment, he had only half of a score ships under his command, including his own. Missing was one of his shore-raiders, the Poison Terror. The ferret left his perch and descended the steps down to the main deck, where his first mate, Darksnout, was yelling orders at his crew.

"Move yer lazy fat bottoms, ye deckswabs! Da Captain wants te reach da Resupply Island by nightfall, so 'urry up!"

"Darksnout, into my cabin immediately," the ferret said, making for the stairs that lead to the upper levels. The searat hurried to comply, though not before sending one last glare at the deck crew.

Once they had climbed a small flight of steps, which led to the Captain's cabin, situated just above the poop. After they had entered, the warlike ferret, dressed in full armour with a flowing black cape with red trim, removed his helmet and placed on the rack next to his desk.

"Darksnout, do you we have enough slaves to man all of the oars on board this ship and the others?" he asked, placing his adderskin gloved paws onto the table. The searat grinned, relieved that he could offer good news to his Captain.

"Aye, Captain Socca. I just received word from Captain Skullthief that 'e's filled all of the oarslots for every ship. The problem is, now his cells are full to the brim after ye took all of the Southswardians that ye could find."

"Stop calling me Captain!" Socca roared unexpectedly. "I will not be referred to as the same rank as my underlings. I killed the king of Southsward, which earns me the right to be king!"

Darksnout shrunk under his leader's harsh gaze. The ferret was terrifying sight, his silver burnished breastplate, trimmed with gold accentuated his black and white fur. His bright white fangs, stained red from the earlier battle, were bared, frightening Darksnout half to death. He had expected his Captain, now King, to be pleased withn the news. Instead, Darksnout's easy manner had backfired right onto him.

"S-sir, h-how about K-King Socca, Slayer of K-Kings?"

As suddenly as it had gone to anger, Socca's mood changed to content. Laughing heartily, the newly named king slapped the searat on the back, nearly sending him sprawling. "Hahaha! King Socca Kingslayer! I like that!"

"B-but sir, I said Socca, Slayer of Kings, not-"

Still laughing, Socca's face turned serious. "Yes, you did. But you are a dimwitted fool, and I am King of the Seas, Southsward, and many other untold lands! Who do you think has better ideas, you, my friend, or me?"

Not wanting to be fishbait, Darksnout stammered out the answer he thought best. He was right. "Y-ye are, me lord."

"You're correct," Darksnout could hardly contain his relief at the answer. "Now go and get my bosun. I need him."

"Yas, King Socca," the unusually tattooless searat responded.

"Oh, and one more thing."

"Yas, me Lord?"

"Go get some tattoos, will you? It's hard for the crew to respect a mate who doesn't even have the guts to get tattooed."

"Y-yas, me Lord," the rat answered, shaking visibly at the thought of the ship's cruel tattooist accessing his body.

Several minutes later, a different searat walked in. The Bloodlust's bosun was one of the shortest, and fattest, rats that most had ever seen. the only reason that Socca kept him around was because he always had the equipment in order and kept the food stocks safe from the crewmembers greedy nature, though more than a few morsels had mysteriously disappeared while he was on duty. Wormbelly, for so he was called, had been demoted several times for his thefts, the only reason his punishments weren't more severe was for all of his past services. Of course, he was always reappointed when the new bosun proved himself incompetent.

"Ye wanted me, Captain?" he said, about to sit on the chair facing Socca.

"ENOUGH!" Socca roared, scaring Wormbelly so bad that he almost fled right then and there. "I will not be called Captain any longer. The commanders of my ships are called Captains. I will not be the same! Oh, and you'll stand."

Wormbelly cringed. "W-wot would ye have me do, sir?" he asked, his oversized belly wobbling with each stammered word. He backed up slightly, not wanting to be within reaching distance of the King if he couldn't sit.

Socca dismissed him with a wave of his gloved paws. "We will discuss that later. It enough for now that you call me 'Lord' or 'King'. Not 'King Socca', though that fool mate of mine already called me that. And certainly not 'Captain'. I will not have that, not anymore. At any rate, do we have a good stock of food supply?"

Wormbelly brightened immediately at the mention of food. "Yes Cap'n-er, I mean, yer Lordship. We have enough to feed yer entire fleet tenfold!"

"What about the slaves?"

Wormbelly grinned nastily. "As long as weh kep 'em starved nice 'an good weh should be fine."

"If we fed the slaves well, would we still have plenty of food?"

Wormbelly's face drooped. "Why would weh wanna give da slaves plenty a food?"

"Just answer my question, Wormbelly."

"Yas sir, of course weh do, sir."

"But of course we'll keep that food for ourselves, won't we?"

Wormbelly's grin returned. "Of course, sir. Of course."

"Good. I like beasts who understand. Now, I need you to make an announcement," Socca said, drawing an evil-looking dagger with a red bound hilt and started to draw lines on the desk.

Wormbelly gulped audibly at the sight of the knife. "Uh, w-wot would ye like m-meh to make an anoun'ment about, K-King?"

"Oh, you know, just about how I will-" suddenly, the huge ferret's tone grew more menacing. "-No longer tolerate being called Captain!"

"B-but don't d-dey already kn-know that, s-sir?"

Socca leapt up and threw the dagger. It had so much force behind it that it snagged Wormbelly's jacket and pinned him to the wall. Socca drew a dagger identical to the one holding Wormbelly in place and placed it on his throat. "Of course they don't," he said, his voice deceptively calm.

"T-they don't?" Wormbelly asked, quaking with fear. The wall boards began to creak from holding up his weight.

"Of course not!" Socca roared. "Only you and that fool mate of mine know! Do you think I've called every beast in my fleet here to tell them that? No! The only reason you know before everyone else is because you are being given the honour of making the announcement!" Taking Wormbelly completely by surprise, Socca suddenly took his daggers and placed them into his belt, dropping Wormbelly to the floor, where he lay shaking. "I'm surrounded by idiots, yet my army is the most successful of these times! Does that not show you who I am? What I can do?"
[close]
Ah, shoot. Please don't read it, it's supposed to be a surprise.
'I ate the sharpest tool in the shed'

"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

Sebias of Redwall

"I can only speak two languages. English and rubbish." ~Brian Jacques <br /><br />"No half-heartedness and no worldly fear must turn us aside from following the light unflinchingly." <br /><br />"Evil labours with vast power and perpetual success - in vain: preparing always only the soil for unexpected good to sprout in."<br /><br />~JRR Tolkien<br /><br />Long live the RRR!

Jack the Quick

But that would spoil the surprise (And I know you love surprises...)
'I ate the sharpest tool in the shed'

"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

The Grey Coincidence

Now famously known as the Four Constellations the panda kids are summoned by the Emperor to the Forbidden City, making Po fear the kids might not need his teachings anymore. But when friends turn to foes, all our heroes will need to draw from their Chi and all their Kung Fu knowledge to defeat evil in an explosive and epic battle.
Profile by the wonderful Vizon.

Also, behold this shiny medal! How I got it is a secret...



Also, also, I am running fanfic conteeeeeests!

Jack the Quick

'I ate the sharpest tool in the shed'

"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

Jack the Quick

What... is the in flight speed velocity of a swallow?
'I ate the sharpest tool in the shed'

"Inconceivable!" ~Vizzini, The Princess Bride

"Art is never complete, only abandoned," ~Leonardo da Vinci

Long live the RRR!!

Jetthebinturong

Nothing, because he doesn't not want to be Spider-Man. Nowhere is he giving up being Spider-Man.

Quote from: Jack the Quick on July 15, 2019, 01:52:23 AM
What... is the in flight speed velocity of a swallow?
*Cough*The line is "what is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
"In the meantime, no one should roam the camp alone. Use the buddy system."
"Understood." Will looked at Nico. "Will you be my buddy?"
"You're a dork," Nico announced.
~ The Hidden Oracle, Rick Riordan