The more random than that other thread thread

[The Skarzs]

lol no

This is literally all I know of Gnosticism, copy and pasted from that essay:

Spoiler

The Gnostic creation myth goes like this: In the realm of nothingness, where all that exists is ideas, there existed pairs of concepts called Aeons meant to create reality by working together. Sophia, the Aeon of Wisdom, wished to "know that which could not be known" by the formless ideas, and so interacted with the Material World without her partner Aeon.

In doing so, she creates the Demiurge--also known as Yaldabaoth, this is described as a sightless God because he cannot perceive the realm of ideas that created him in the first place.

Seeing nothing around but himself in the Material world, Yaldabaoth declares himself God and sets about creating humanity and the contents of reality–explaining why pain and suffering exist: The physical world is a product of a being of evil.

Feeling sympathy for the plight of us mortals subjected to suffering, Sophia Descends from the plane of ideas into the physical realm, imbuing in us the power of her Light, also described as Pleroma, granting us the power to perceive the world of Ideas...and thus, climb endlessly upwards to achieve Enlightenment.

...

Abraxas, meanwhile [in contrast to Yaldabaoth], is described as the Great Unseen, the hidden invisible God beyond Good and Evil who combines all opposites into one being.

[close]

Wait most of the stuff on Abraxas comes from a different essay, as well as expounding on Yaldabaoth.

Spoiler

The primary traits of the Demiurge are:

An inability to grasp the world of ideas
The flawed power to shape and create the entire physical world
A degree of evil, or at least arrogance bordering on cruel hubris
So the Demiurge is the God who creates the whole universe — but can't really think, and is kind of a bad artist. As a result, the world is full of pain and suffering.

...

Yaldabaoth is a God with absolute power over physical reality. Abraxas presides over reality in its totality, but his true home, origin, and source of power is the realm of thought — the World of Ideas.

...

...In Gnostic Myth, Christ isn't an envoy of the God from the Old Testament, since that was entity was represented by Yoobieboobie [sic. (he means Yaldabaoth. Calling Yaldabaoth something else is a running gag in Homestuck)].

Instead, Christ was an Aeon (an Idea-God, sort of like an angel that only exists as a concept in its natural state)— the original partner to Sophia, the spirit of Wisdom, in fact — sent to Earth by Abraxas to save humanity from Yadlenadle's [sic. (again, Yaldabaoth)] malicious will.

But even that doesn't capture the full scope of the deity. Abraxas is described as the embodiment of the duality of all things — it's not so much that it created existence, as that the experience of existence itself is a symptom of Abraxas' relentless self-expansion.

Abraxas is itself, but it is also every Aeon, and every idea and thought in the world of ideas, and every manifestation of those ideas as they're expressed in the world of matter. It is a being of married opposites and duality, and that means Yaldabaoth is an just another facet of it's being, too.

Abraxas. Is. Everything.

[close]

While the mythos itself is fascinating, its relation to Homestuck is infinitely moreso (to me), explaining Caliborn as Demiurge, Homestuck as slave to Caliborn (as Demiurge he controls the physical reality of the comic), Jake and Karkat as champions of Abraxas, and Karkat specifically as Second Coming of Christ (a motif that was obvious even from a mainstream Christian perspective, but made a whole lot deeper when taken as the Gnostic presentation of Christ).

Homestuck is a deeply philosophical, humanistic work that deserves to be studied academically, not just by passionate fans on the internet.

Nevermind, then.
Those are. . . Very unique.

[Cornflower MM]

True, that. Maybe that's what I kind of liked about Tennant. . .

Ah. Interesting. To each their own, I suppose.

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

Ve av need ziz:

[The Skarzs]

Yes we do.

[Wylder Treejumper]

Forgive my ignorance, but it sounds similar to some things I have heard are in Mormonism. Probably wrong, of course. @Wylder Treejumper may have more insight on both, as he is pretty knowledgeable.

I'm afraid you are rather far off base @The Skarzs : Gnosticism is absolutely nothing like LDS theology. The Gnostics were a strange bunch, only tangentially related to modern Christianity. They didn't share what is generally considered the unifying theme of all Christian religions, namely Salvation Theology (sotoriology). The Gnostics believed that salvation was achieved through coming to possess divine knowledge (Gnosis). Thus, to them, Jesus was a teacher or revealer of this Gnosis, rather than a substitutiary or mediative sacrifice for sin (as the Gnostics didn't believe there was such a thing as "sin" persay, only ignorance).

[The Skarzs]

Nevermind, then.

[Jetthebinturong]

Jet presents Pokémon is darker than you think part 1!

You know Pokémon? That game about kids befriending cuddly animals and travelling around the world with them. That game series that is specifically targeted at children? Well it has some truly horrific aspects to it, and I'm going to share some of them with you now.

I'm mostly talking about the Pokédex entries - things that describe these cute animals. Some of them are truly messed up, and you wonder how they ended up in a children's game.

A Pokémon qualifies for this list if:

• They have horrifically destructive power
• They are referred to as being particularly violent, brutal or sadistic
• They have been targeted by humans
• They display the cruelty of nature
• They live a life of constant torment
• Their story is notably sad
• Their concept is disturbing
• Nintendo has roasted them

Generation 1 Pokédex entries

Charmander, the Lizard Pokémon
"From the time it is born, a flame burns at the tip of its tail. Its life would end if the flame were to go out." ~ Pokémon FireRed


Charmeleon, the Flame Pokémon
"It has a barbaric nature. In battle, it whips its fiery tail around and slashes away with sharp claws." ~ Pokémon Silver
"Charmeleon mercilessly destroys its foes using its sharp claws." ~ Pokémon Ruby & Sapphire
"It lashes about with its tail to knock down its foe. It then tears up the fallen opponent with sharp claws." ~ Pokémon FireRed



Charizard, the Flame Pokémon
"Spits fire that is hot enough to melt boulders. Known to cause forest fires unintentionally." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"Breathing intense, hot flames, it can melt almost anything. Its breath inflicts terrible pain on enemies." ~ Pokémon Silver


Blastoise, the Shellfish Pokémon
"The rocket cannons on its shell fire jets of water capable of punching holes through thick steel." ~ Pokémon Silver


Caterpie, the Worm Pokémon
"Its body is soft and weak. In nature, its perpetual fate is to be seen by others as food." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Butterfree, the Butterfly Pokémon
"Its wings are covered with poisonous dust. If you see one flapping its wings, be careful not to inhale any of the dust." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Rattata, the Mouse Pokémon
"Its incisors grow continuously throughout its life. If its incisors get too long, this Pokémon becomes unable to eat, and it starves to death." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Raticate, the Mouse Pokémon
"Its disposition is far more violent than its looks would suggest. Don't let your hand get too close to its face, as it could bite your hand clean off." ~ Pokémon Moon


Arbok, the Cobra Pokémon
"Transfixing prey with the face-like pattern on its belly, it binds and poisons the frightened victim." ~ Pokémon Gold
"With a very vengeful nature, it won't give up the chase, no matter how far, once it targets its prey." ~ Pokémon Silver
"This Pokémon is terrifically strong in order to constrict things with its body. It can even flatten steel oil drums. Once Arbok wraps its body around its foe, escaping its crunching embrace is impossible." ~ Pokémon Ruby & Sapphire


Pikachu, the Mouse Pokémon
"When several of these Pokémon gather, their electricity could build and cause lightning storms." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue


Raichu, the Mouse Pokémon
"It can loose 100,000-volt bursts of electricity, instantly downing foes several times its size." ~ Pokémon Y
"It unleashes electric shocks that can reach 100,000 volts. When agitated, it can knock out even an Indian elephant." ~ Pokémon Sun
"It becomes aggressive when it has electricity stored up. At such times, even its Trainer has to take care to avoid being attacked." ~ Pokémon Moon
"Because so many Trainers like the way Pikachu looks, you don't see this Pokémon very often." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Sandslash, the Mouse Pokémon
"Sandslash can roll up its body as if it were a ball covered with large spikes. In battle, this Pokémon will try to make the foe flinch by jabbing it with its spines. It then leaps at the stunned foe to tear wildly with its sharp claws." ~ Pokémon Sapphire


Alolan Sandslash
"This Pokémon's steel spikes are sheathed in ice. Stabs from these spikes cause deep wounds and severe frostbite as well." ~ Pokémon Moon


Nidoran♀, the Poison Pin Pokémon
"The poison hidden in its small horn is extremely potent. Even a tiny scratch can have fatal results." ~ Pokémon Gold
"While it does not prefer to fight, even one drop of the poison it secretes from its barbs can be fatal." ~ Pokémon Diamond, Pearl & Platinum


Nidorino, the Poison Pin Pokémon
"Its horn is harder than diamond. If it punctures an enemy, it pumps powerful venom into the wound." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Nidoking, the Drill Pokémon
"Its tail is thick and powerful. If it binds an enemy, it can snap the victim's spine quite easily." ~ Pokémon Silver
"Nidoking's thick tail packs enormously destructive power. With one swing, it can topple a metal transmission tower. Once this Pokémon goes on a rampage, there is no stopping it." ~ Pokémon Ruby & Sapphire
"One swing of its mighty tail can snap a telephone pole as if it were a matchstick." ~ Pokémon Diamond, Pearl & Platinum


Clefairy, the Fairy Pokémon
"They're popular, but they're rare. Trainers who show them off recklessly may be targeted by thieves." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Clefable, the Fairy Pokémon
"Some scientists believe that it gazes intently at the sky on nights with a full moon because it's homesick." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Ninetales, the Fox Pokémon
"Very smart and very vengeful. Grabbing one of its many tails could result in a 1000-year curse." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"According to an enduring legend, 9 noble saints were united and reincarnated as this Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"It is extremely vindictive. It is said to lay a 1,000-year long curse if its tail is pulled as a joke." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"Ninetales casts a sinister light from its bright red eyes to gain total control over its foe's mind. This Pokémon is said to live for a thousand years." ~ Pokémon Ruby
"Legend has it that this mystical Pokémon was formed when nine saints coalesced into one." ~ Pokémon Sun
"Said to live for a thousand years, this Pokémon uses its supernatural abilities to manipulate fire. It can burn its prey to a crisp as it pleases." ~ Pokémon Moon
"It is vindictive and relentless by nature. Those who cross it even once will be cursed for a thousand years, along with their descendants." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Wigglytuff, the Balloon Pokémon
"The rich, fluffy fur that covers its body feels so good that anyone who feels it can't stop touching it." ~ Pokémon Crystal


Golbat, the Bat Pokémon
"Once it strikes, it will not stop draining energy from the victim even if it gets too heavy to fly." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"Golbat loves to drink the blood of living things. It is particularly active in the pitch black of night. This Pokémon flits around in the night skies, seeking fresh blood." ~ Pokémon Ruby
"It loves the blood of humans and Pokémon. It flies around at night in search of neck veins." ~ Pokémon Diamond
"Flitting around in the dead of night, it sinks its fangs into its prey and drains a nearly fatal amount of blood." ~ Pokémon Black 2 & White 2
"Sometimes they drink so much blood, they can't fly anymore. Then they fall to the ground and become food for other Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Moon


Gloom, the Weed Pokémon
"The horrible-smelling pistil of this flower stinks over a mile away. Unwittingly inhaled, it can cause fainting." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"A horribly noxious honey drools from its mouth. One whiff of the honey can result in memory loss. Some fans are said to enjoy this overwhelming stink, however." ~ Pokémon Emerald


Vileplume, the Flower Pokémon
"It has the world's largest petals. With every step, the petals shake out heavy clouds of toxic pollen." ~ Pokémon Gold
"Vileplume has the world's largest petals. They are used to attract prey that are then doused with toxic spores. Once the prey are immobilized, this Pokémon catches and devours them." ~ Pokémon Sapphire
"In seasons when it produces more pollen, the air around a Vileplume turns yellow with the powder as it walks. The pollen is highly toxic and causes paralysis." ~ Pokémon Emerald


Paras, the Mushroom Pokémon
"The tochukaso growing on this Pokémon's back orders it to extract juice from tree trunks." Pokémon Crystal
"No matter how much it eats, the mushrooms growing on its back steal away most of the nutrients it consumes." ~ Pokémon Sun
"The mushrooms, known as tochukaso, are controlling the bug. Even if the bug bugs the mushrooms, they tell it to bug off." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Parasect, the Mushroom Pokémon
"A host-parasite pair in which the parasite mushroom has taken over the host bug. Prefers damp places." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"The bug host is drained of energy by the mushrooms on its back. They appear to do all the thinking." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"When nothing's left to extract from the bug, the mushrooms on its back leave spores on the bug's egg." ~ Pokémon Crystal
"The bug is mostly dead, with the mushroom on its back having become the main body. If the mushroom comes off, the bug stops moving." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Venomoth, the Poison Moth Pokémon
"The powder on its wings is poisonous. It scatters the powder with every flap, so you may be poisoned if you are downwind." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Dugtrio, the Mole Pokémon
"A team of Diglett triplets. It triggers huge earthquakes by burrowing 60 miles underground." ~ Pokémon LeafGreen


Persian, the Classy Cat Pokémon
"Behind its lithe, elegant appearance lies a barbaric side. It will tear apart its prey on a mere whim." ~ Pokémon Crystal
"It has a violent temperament. It will attack anything that looks it in the eye. Its sharp claws inflict deep wounds." ~ Pokémon Sun
"This Pokémon is popular with rich people. It's also targeted by hunters who are after the jewel in its forehead." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Alolan Persian
"In contrast to its lovely face, it's so brutal that it tortures its weakened prey rather than finishing them off." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Psyduck, the Duck Pokémon
"Always tormented by headaches. It uses psychic powers, but it is not known if it intends to do so." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"As a result of headaches so fierce they cause it to cry, it sometimes uses psychokinesis without meaning to." ~ Pokémon Sun
"This Pokémon is troubled by constant headaches. The more pain it's in, the more powerful its psychokinesis becomes." ~ Pokémon Moon


Golduck, the Duck Pokémon
"It is said that the red part of its forehead grants supernatural powers to those who possess one, so it was over-hunted in the past." ~ Pokémon Sun


Primeape, the Pig Monkey Pokémon
"It has been known to become so angry that it dies as a result. Its face looks peaceful in death, however." ~ Pokémon Sun
"It will never forgive opponents who have angered it. Even after it has beaten them down until they can't move, it never ever forgives." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Kadabra, the Psi Pokémon
"It is rumored that a boy with psychic abilities suddenly transformed into Kadabra while he was assisting research into extrasensory powers." ~ Pokémon Emerald
"A theory exists that this Pokémon was a young boy who couldn't control his psychic powers and ended up transformed into this Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Sun
"Kadabra's presence infests televisions and monitors with creepy shadows that bring bad luck." ~ Pokémon Moon


Machoke, the Superpower Pokémon
"The belt around its waist holds back its energy. Without it, this Pokémon would be unstoppable." ~ Pokémon Yellow


Machamp, the Superpower Pokémon
"One arm alone can move mountains. Using all four arms, this Pokémon fires off awesome punches." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"It uses its four powerful arms to pin the limbs of its foe, then throws the victim over the horizon." ~ Pokémon Silver
"Its four ruggedly developed arms can launch a flurry of 1,000 punches in just two seconds." ~ Pokémon FireRed
"It unleashes megaton-level punches that send opponents flying clear over the horizon." ~ Pokémon Sun


Weepinbell, the Flycatcher Pokémon
"Armed with razor-sharp leaves, it uses toxic pollen to immobilize its enemy and melts the helpless foe with Acid." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Victreebell, the Flycatcher Pokémon
"This horrifying plant Pokémon attracts prey with aromatic honey, then melts them in its mouth." ~ Pokémon Silver


Grimer, the Sludge Pokémon
"Wherever Grimer has passed, so many germs are left behind that no plants will ever grow again." ~ Pokémon Silver
"It was born from sludge on the ocean floor. In a sterile environment, the germs within its body can't multiply, and it dies." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun
"The wastewater coming from factories is clean these days, so Grimer have nothing to eat. They're said to be on the verge of extinction." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Alolan Grimer
"The crystals on Grimer's body are lumps of toxins. If one falls off, lethal poisons leak out." ~ Pokémon Moon


Muk, the Sludge Pokémon
"Thickly covered with a filthy, vile sludge. It is so toxic, even its footprints contain poison." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"Becomes indistinguishable if it hides in dirt. Touching its sludge-covered body causes horrible poisonings." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"As it moves, a very strong poison leaks from it, making the ground there barren for three years." ~ Pokémon Crystal
"From Muk's body seeps a foul fluid that gives off a nose-bendingly horrible stench. Just one drop of this Pokémon's body fluid can turn a pool stagnant and rancid." ~ Pokémon Ruby
"A toxic fluid seeps from its body. The fluid instantly kills plants and trees on contact." ~ Pokémon Diamond, Pearl & Platinum
"After recent environmental improvements, this Pokémon is now hardly seen at all. People speculate that it may go extinct at some point." ~ Pokémon Moon
"Because they scatter germs everywhere, they've long been targeted for extermination, leading to a steep decline in their population." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Alolan Muk
"What look like fangs and claws are actually crystallized poison that will afflict you at a mere touch, so don't get too close." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Gastly, the Gas Pokémon
"Its thin body is made of gas. It can envelop an opponent of any size and cause suffocation." ~ Pokémon Silver
"It's said that gas emanating from a graveyard was possessed by the grievances of the deceased and thus became a Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun
"Poisonous gas comprises 95% of its body. It's said that the remaining 5% is made up of the souls of those who died from the gas." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Haunter, the Gas Pokémon
"In total darkness, where nothing is visible, Haunter lurks, silently stalking its next victim." ~ Pokémon Gold
"Its tongue is made of gas. If licked, its victim starts shaking constantly until death eventually comes." ~ Pokémon Silver
"If a Haunter beckons you while it is floating in darkness, don't approach it. This Pokémon will try to lick you with its tongue and steal your life away." ~ Pokémon Emerald
"It strikes at humans from total darkness. Those licked by its cold tongue grow weaker with each passing day until they die." ~ Pokémon Sun
"On moonless nights, Haunter searches for someone to curse, so it's best not to go out walking around." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun
"It's dangerous to go outside alone on nights when you're feeling sad. Haunter will catch you, and you won't be able to go back home." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Gengar, the Shadow Pokémon
"A Gengar is close by if you feel a sudden chill. It may be trying to lay a curse on you." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"Appears to attack people who get lost in the mountains. Said to be the culprit behind shadows that laugh in the moonlight." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"To steal the life of its target, it slips into the prey's shadow and silently waits for an opportunity." ~ Pokémon Silver
"It is said to emerge from darkness to steal the lives of those who become lost in mountains." ~ Pokémon FireRed
"Lurking in the shadowy corners of rooms, it awaits chances to steal its prey's life force." ~ Pokémon Pearl
"The leer that floats in darkness belongs to a Gengar delighting in casting curses on people." ~ Pokémon Platinum
"Should you feel yourself attacked by a sudden chill, it is evidence of an approaching Gengar. There is no escaping it. Give up." ~ Pokémon Sun
"It apparently wishes for a traveling companion. Since it was once human itself, it tries to create one by taking the lives of other humans." ~ Pokémon Moon
"You can hear tales told all over the world about how Gengar will pay a visit to children who are naughty." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun
"Even your home isn't safe. Gengar will lurk in whatever dark corner of a room it can find and wait for its chance to catch its prey." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Mega Gengar
"Gengar's relationships are warped. It has no interest in opponents unless it perceives them as prey." ~ Pokémon Sun
"The energy of Mega Evolution awakened it. It sinks into another dimension, where it keeps a patient watch for its chance to attack." ~ Pokémon Moon
"It tries to take the lives of anyone and everyone. It will even try to curse the Trainer who is its master!" ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Drowzee, the Hypnosis Pokémon
"It remembers every dream it eats. It rarely eats the dreams of adults because children's are much tastier." ~ Pokémon Silver
"If your nose becomes itchy while you are sleeping, it's a sure sign that a Drowzee is standing above your pillow and trying to eat your dream through your nostrils." ~ Pokémon Emerald
"It can be spotted near recreational facilities, intending to eat the pleasant dreams of children who enjoyed themselves there that day." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Hypno, the Hypnosis Pokémon
"It carries a pendulum-like device. There once was an incident in which it took away a child it hypnotized." ~ Pokémon X
"As a matter of course, it makes anyone it meets fall asleep and has a taste of their dreams. Anyone having a good dream, it carries off." ~ Pokémon Moon


Voltorb, the Ball Pokémon
"It rolls to move. If the ground is uneven, a sudden jolt from hitting a bump can cause it to explode." ~ Pokémon Gold


Electrode, the Ball Pokémon
I'm not going to quote any Pokédex entries in particular, just note that they all mention that it will explode for basically no reason.


Cubone, the Lonely Pokémon
"Wears the skull of its deceased mother. Its cries echo inside the skull and come out as a sad melody." ~ Pokémon Yellow
"Always wears the skull of its deceased mother on its head and never shows its face. It cries mournfully in the moonlight." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"Cubone pines for the mother it will never see again. Seeing a likeness of its mother in the full moon, it cries. The stains on the skull the Pokémon wears are made by the tears it sheds." ~ Pokémon Ruby & Sapphire
"It wears the skull of its dead mother on its head. When it becomes lonesome, it is said to cry loudly." ~ Pokémon FireRed
"When it thinks of its dead mother, it cries. Its crying makes the skull it wears rattle hollowly." ~ Pokémon Diamond, Pearl & Platinum
"When it thinks of its deceased mother, it weeps loudly. Mandibuzz that hear its cries will attack it from the air." ~ Pokémon Sun
"It wears its mother's skull on its head, so no one knows what its bare face looks like. However, it's clear that it's always crying." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Marowak, the Bone Keeper Pokémon
Alolan Marowak
"The bones it possesses were once its mother's. Its mother's regrets have become like a vengeful spirit protecting this Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Sun
"Its custom is to mourn its lost companions. Mounds of dirt by the side of the road mark the graves of the Marowak." ~ Pokémon Moon
"When it beats opponents with its bone, the cursed flames spread to them. No amount of water will stop those flames from burning." ~ Pokémon Ultra Moon


Hitmonlee, the Kicking Pokémon
"When kicking, the sole of its foot turns as hard as a diamond on impact and destroys its enemy." ~ Pokémon Yellow


Koffing, the Poison Gas Pokémon
"Because it stores several kinds of toxic gases in its body, it is prone to exploding without warning." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue


Starmie, the Mysterious Pokémon
"Its core shines in many colors and sends radio signals into space to communicate with something." ~ Pokémon Black 2 & White 2
"Its shining core is thought to receive and transmit enigmatic signals. It has been known to cause headaches in those who approach it." ~ Pokémon Sun
"Its sparkling core is called "the gem of the sea." This core can be made into high-priced accessories that are traded in secret." ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Magmar, the Spitfire Pokémon
"With a body temperature of close to 2,200 degrees, its body is always burning with orange flames. Lives near volcanoes." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Pinsir, the Stag Beetle Pokémon
"It grips prey with its powerful pincers and will not let go until the prey is torn in half." ~ Pokémon Black 2 & White 2


Magikarp, the Fish Pokémon
"For no reason, it jumps and splashes about, making it easy for predators like Pidgeotto to catch it mid-jump." ~ Pokémon Silver
"Magikarp is a pathetic excuse for a Pokémon that is only capable of flopping and splashing." ~ Pokémon Ruby
"It is virtually worthless in terms of both power and speed. It is the most weak and pathetic Pokémon in the world." ~ Pokémon FireRed
"Although weak and helpless, this Pokémon is incredibly fertile. They exist in such multitudes, you'll soon grow tired of seeing them." ~ Pokémon Sun


Gyarados, the Atrocious Pokémon
"Extremely vicious and horribly brutal. Has enough destructive power to totally annihilate even a major city." ~ Pokémon Stadium
"They say that during past wars, Gyarados would appear and leave blazing ruins in its wake." ~ Pokémon Gold
"It appears whenever there is world conflict, burning down any place it travels through." ~ Pokémon Crystal
"Once Gyarados goes on a rampage, its ferociously violent blood doesn't calm until it has burned everything down. There are records of this Pokémon's rampages lasting a whole month." ~ Pokémon Sapphire
"It has an extremely aggressive nature. The Hyper Beam it shoots from its mouth totally incinerates all targets." ~ Pokémon FireRed
"Once it appears, its rage never settles until it has razed the fields and mountains around it." ~ Pokémon Diamond
"A tale is told of a town that angered Gyarados. Before the sun rose the next day, flames utterly consumed the town, leaving not a trace behind." ~ Pokémon Sun
"There are people who swear that any place Gyarados appears is fated for destruction." ~ Pokémon Moon
"It fires hyper beams in all directions, burning the surrounding area to ash. There are some regions where it's called "the deity of destruction."" ~ Pokémon Ultra Sun


Mega Gyarados
"Mega Evolution also affects its brain, leaving no other function except its destructive instinct to burn everything to cinders." ~ Pokémon Sun


Lapras, the Transport Pokémon
"A Pokémon that has been overhunted almost to extinction." ~ Pokémon Red & Blue
"They have gentle hearts. Because they rarely fight, many have been caught. Their number has dwindled." ~ Pokémon Gold
"People have driven Lapras almost to the point of extinction. In the evenings, this Pokémon is said to sing plaintively as it seeks what few others of its kind still remain." ~ Pokémon Ruby & Sapphire


Jolteon, the Lightning Pokémon
"It accumulates negative ions in the atmosphere to blast out 10,000-volt lightning bolts." ~ Pokémon Y


Flareon, the Flame Pokémon
"Its fiery breath reaches close to 3,000 degrees. Its body temperature exceeds 1,650 degrees when storing fire inside." ~ Pokémon Stadium


Articuno, the Freeze Pokémon
"A legendary bird Pokémon that is said to appear to doomed people who are lost in icy mountains." ~ Pokémon LeafGreen


Zapdos, the Lightning Pokémon
"This legendary bird Pokémon causes savage thunderstorms by flapping its glittering wings." ~ Pokémon Gold


Dragonite, the Dragon Pokémon
"Incur the wrath of this normally calm Pokémon at your peril, because it will smash everything to smithereens before it's satisfied." ~ Pokémon Moon


Mewtwo, the Genetic Pokémon
"A Pokémon created by recombining Mew's genes. It's said to have the most savage heart among Pokémon." ~ Pokémon Diamond, Pearl & Platinum
"It was created by a scientist after years of horrific gene-splicing and DNA-engineering experiments." ~ Pokémon X

[close]

Wow that was a lot more than I was expecting. If you don't look at all of them, at the very least check out Ninetales and Gengar.

[HeadInAnotherGalaxy]

I'm afraid you are rather far off base @The Skarzs : Gnosticism is absolutely nothing like LDS theology. The Gnostics were a strange bunch, only tangentially related to modern Christianity. They didn't share what is generally considered the unifying theme of all Christian religions, namely Salvation Theology (sotoriology). The Gnostics believed that salvation was achieved through coming to possess divine knowledge (Gnosis). Thus, to them, Jesus was a teacher or revealer of this Gnosis, rather than a substitutiary or mediative sacrifice for sin (as the Gnostics didn't believe there was such a thing as "sin" persay, only ignorance).

Zae zen tiz zomevot loike Azcenzion in ze Stargate Univerze?

[Rusvul]

Homestuck is a deeply philosophical, humanistic work that deserves to be studied academically, not just by passionate fans on the internet.

It's also excessively long, in an unusual (and new) format, and very irreverent. I wouldn't hold your breath. (Having a reputation for a rabid fanbase probably doesn't help either.)

[MeadowR]

Jet presents Pokémon is darker than you think part 1!

This was of some interest to me.

One mentioned about an Indian elephant... now how the heck would they know about Indian elephants? Is it accepted in Pokemon that there are other lands, (in fact Earth which the Pokemon lands are apart of?), which have 'ordinary' animals now? I suppose how else would they know to call a Pikachu a mouse Pokemon, etc. I haven't played any of the games since Crystal, so don't know what the thinking is these days.

In spite of the Pokedex entry, always preferred Raichu to Pikachu, myself!

But yeah, the stories behind the Pokemon just seem to get creepier. What I don't get is things like how you can have one Cubone mourning its mother, yet actually there are more than one Cubone. They all have the same story, do they? etc.

[Wylder Treejumper]

The entire rational of Pokemon has always seemed rather iffy to me- and to a lot of other people too, no doubt. Catching at least semi-intelligent (and sometimes fully intelligent) animals, cramming them into tiny balls and then having them fight each other endlessly for entertainment...


I mean, sure, it's a kids game, and an innocent one at that. But they didn't exactly make it difficult to twist into something morbid.

[Jetthebinturong]

Well the story Pokémon tells to make it okay is that Pokémon enjoy fighting, and the more they fight, the more they bond with their trainer.

Also Pokéballs convert Pokémon into digital information and store them in a cyberspacial paradise which is designed uniquely for each Pokémon species. So you don't cram them into tiny balls.

[Wylder Treejumper]

OK, so instead of cramming them into tiny balls we disintegrate them and then create an AI which replicates their consciousness, then reconstitute them later when we want them to fight.


So, then the question is- why do people in Pokemon games walk anywhere when they have teleportation technology?

[The Skarzs]

Obesity prevention.

[Jetthebinturong]

Well almost the entire world and society of Pokémon revolves around catching Pokémon, training Pokémon, breeding Pokémon, studying Pokémon and discovering new Pokémon. You can't discover new creatures by teleporting.