The Wedding of Ebanok

[Kade Rivok]

Pffft, weak.  Also, I think you have no control over that.

Also also, am I that bad a prospect?  I'm hurt.  Almost too hurt for words.  Almost.

[lass of something much]

I have an announcement: *clears throat several times*
Due to the fact that I value my life slightly more than I thought I did, this event will not be happening. Please give my apologies to any disappointed guests.

have y...is that you? that dose not sound like you!?

[Verdauga]

Alright Shisteer; what did Eb threaten you with.

[One-Eye the wildcat]

Murder.

exposition of Teer's deepest secret,

Perhaps she took hostages... Teer's pretty fond of Lass, right?

[Sebias of Redwall]

Murder.

exposition of Teer's deepest secret,

Perhaps she took hostages... Teer's pretty fond of Lass, right?

Hmm... Good theories, there... *Puts on detective hat* Hmm... I wonder

[Keva Strongbow]

Alrighty, *Grabs Ebby by the shoulders* Where did u go with Teer?

[One-Eye the wildcat]

let me handle this, keva.

*puts gun to eb's head* ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND NOW!

WHERE'S TEER?! Huh?! YOU WANT A BULLET IN YOUR HEAD?!?!

[Ebantu the Kararehe]

*flexes claws* Not telling. Now let me go while you still have a nose.

[One-Eye the wildcat]

I'm a wildcat too, and I have a gun.

[Ebantu the Kararehe]

Wow. Now I'm really scared. *watches Whatitiri land silently behind One Eye* Don't kill him, Whatitiri. Just mortally wound him.

[Kade Rivok]

*Kade puts away the phone, finally through.*  Hey Eb, I got Pavarotti doing some singing for us as entertainment.  Also, I managed to contact a casting director from around here, so we're getting a bunch of the extras from the Lord of the Rings movies and having a live action re-enactment of the Battle of Helm's Deep as part of the after show.

[lass of something much]

cool!.
I know eb and I trust her, do not harm her or YOU shall suffer grately

[shisteer of nothing much]

let me handle this, keva.

*puts gun to eb's head* ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND NOW!

WHERE'S TEER?! Huh?! YOU WANT A BULLET IN YOUR HEAD?!?!

*said in weak voice* Please, no violence. Just cancel the wedding and everyone can live happily. I know Ebby and Kade would make the perfec- Ebby and Kade will never make a good couple. The only thing to do now is cancel all arrangements and forget about it.

[Kade Rivok]

Uh, hate to break it to ya, but arrangements definitely can't be cancelled.  I went through a lot of trouble getting the acts I've got lined up to sign on; I definitely can't cancel at this point.  We'll have to figure something else out.

[Verdauga]

let me handle this, keva.

*puts gun to eb's head* ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND NOW!

WHERE'S TEER?! Huh?! YOU WANT A BULLET IN YOUR HEAD?!?!