Jokes

[Nightfire]

Weird. I love mime jokes, so here's a few to lighten up your day. Unfortunately, some of them are violent. I think the person that wrote them had a bad mime experience in the past. But, I find them humorous:

Q: If a tree fell on a mime in the forest, would it make a sound?

Q: When you shoot a mime, do you have to use a silencer?

Q: When a mime gets arrested, do the police bother telling him he has the right to remain silent?

[Mad Maudie]

What is a mime??

[Nightfire]

Someone who wears black and white clothing, and they never, ever, EVER make a sound. Not even a cough or grunt. I don't like mimes. They're creepy:

[Tiria Wildlough]

Wow, that's creepy. It's the kind of thing that would make me afraid to turn my back in bed.

[Nightfire]

Hence the mime jokes.

[winifred]

where did Tammelo and Pasque go after they were wed???On their bunnymoon of course wot!

[Redwall Musician]

What does a girl shark nick-name her boyfriend?
Sweet Tooth!

What's a duck's favorite Christmas song?
"Duck the halls with bells of holly!"

What's a kitten's favorite fish?
A pur-anha.

[DanielofRedwall]

A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
The barman refuses to serve him.
"Why not," asks the golf club.
"You'll be driving later," replies the bartender.

[Nightfire]

Nice. Okay, here is a blonde joke, in the form of a story.

A man was out driving one day, when he hit a hare with his car. He got out and began crying over the creature's body. Then another car drives up, and a blonde woman gets out. "Why are you crying?" she asks.
"I hit this poor little creature, and now it's dead!" sobs the man.
"Oh, that's no problem!" The woman takes a can out of her purse and sprays the creature with it. Immediately, it gets up, hops a few times, then waves. It hops, then waves, hops, then waves...all the way until it is out of sight.
The man is amazed. "How did you do that??"
The blonde woman looks at the can and reads the label. "'Hair Spray. For a maximum wave.'"

[Mad Maudie]

Hahaha, good ones!

Okayokayokay here's another: if athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get? MISSLE TOE! BAHAHAHA!

It doesn't take much to amuse me. :I

I'm going through these and it does not take me a lot to get amused

[Nightfire]

These are hilarious!

[eualaia]

yes it IS

[redwallgurl]

heres anothe blonde joke (o woe on my hair)
a burnette and blonde and a redhead are running form the cops.
they come to a cliff. they all have one wish before they jump off.
the redhead says i wish to land on money and she lands on money
the burnette says i wish to land on pillows and she lands on pillows
the blonde though trips over a rock and says bad stuff and falls on a pile of bad stuff!!!

[Tiria Wildlough]

Oh yeah, I have a joke like that.
Three men are told they can slide down the slide and wish to land in something. The first man says 'Gold!' and he lands in gold. The second man says 'Diamonds' and he lands in diamonds.
But the third man wasn't listening, and as he goes down, he says 'Wheeeeee!' Guess what he landed in?

[eualaia]

XD THAT ONE WAS FUNNY