The Endless Story

[James Gryphon]

The superweapon was left sitting out in the open. It had a huge red button on top of it, and a big sign in neon lights that had a flashing arrow pointing down to the button, and read "PRESS ME TO BLOW UP A PLANET".

[LT Sandpaw]

Then Jill the cleaning maid came in and started dusting the weapon having somehow missed all the warning signs.

[Vilu Daskar]

and pressed the button.

[LT Sandpaw]

And Pluto blew up, and everyone got into a big argument of whether the weapon actually blew up a planet or not.

[Vilu Daskar]

Then everyone who disagreed with the side that said the weapon did it were murdered by ...

[Izeroth]

 Coordinated drone strikes, which were supported by Apple's brand-new iWar™ platform.

[Hickory]

Microsoft hackers broke into the iWar™ software and tokk all the information for themselves, using the information to blame the strikes on Abraham Lincoln.

[Vilu Daskar]

But that didn't matter since he was dead.

[LT Sandpaw]

At least that was popular belief. In truth advanced scientists preserved him using cryogenic technology and just now woke him up so he could save the world.

[Izeroth]

 The Galaxy was engaged in a great civil war, fought between the Gameites, who supported Games Jryphon's galactic government, and the Ledthiocons, who were assisting Ledthion's attempted takeover of the universe.

[Lady Ashenwyte]

And Uncle Iroh served them both Jasmine tea.

[LT Sandpaw]

Then they had a arm wrestling competition with Abraham presiding.

[Jukka the Sling]

Unfortunately, Ledthion's arm broke while arm-wrestling.

[Hickory]

Bombur came in and beat them both at arm-wrestling.

[James Gryphon]

This was because his arm was so heavy that nobody but him could lift it.