The (rather pointless) Redwall Forum Show

[Galedeep]

An otter sounds fine. Thanks Dan!

[Nightfire]

Hahaha! I'm glad you are all liking what Tiria and I have been writing!  I think my next one will be an interview of some Badger Lords...

[Tiria Wildlough]

We could call ourselve, 'THe Redwall Forum Show Team.'

[DanielofRedwall]

@Nightfire- make sure it has Sunflash!!!

[Galedeep]

We could call ourselve, 'THe Redwall Forum Show Team.'

Yes, I like it!

[Coobreedan]

The Redwall Forum Talk Show
King Dedede

-Inside King Dedede's throne room-

DDD: Okay. I need a monster that lets me on that Pinkwall Forum Talk Show!
Escargoon: Sire, it's Redwall.
DDD: Who cares? Okay, Customer Service, what have ya got?
CS: Well, we have got this one monster who knows Redwall quite well...
DDD: Okay! Send it! 

-CS sends Tsarmina-

DDD: (Laughing) Hahahaha. Hahahahahahahah! This will be good...

-In the talk room-

Nightfire: Yalayahoooooo!

-Tsarsmina bursts in-

Tsarmina: I'm baaaack!
DDD: And I make my debut on this here Pinkwall Show!
Escargoon: Didn't I tell you, sire, it's-
DDD: (Whacks Escargoon with hammer) It's not Pinkwall or Redwall! It's DDD Talk!
Nighfire: What's with the fat penguin and the snail?
Tsarmina: I dunno. They released me from Nightmare Enterprises, so I owe them one.
Nighfire: Okay. Bye bye.

-Nightfire leaps at Tsarsmina-

Escargoon: Hey! Get off the King's monster!
DDD: It doesn't matter, you slug. We have made it to Pinkwall!
Escargoon: (Whispering) If you think I'm sluggish you should see yourself...
DDD: What was that?!
Skalrag: Errrrr...Penguin guy...Do you have feathers?
DDD: I dunno, do you?
Skalrag: Nooo! Definately not!
DDD: Sooooo, is this all we do on a talk show?
Skalrag: Yeah.
DDD: (Looking towards Nighfire and Tsarmina fighting) Does the rat always do that?
Skalrag: Yup.
DDD: Listen up low-lives! This here talk show sucks! I'm leavin'!
Redwall Musician: Trust me everyone, not all of our episodes are as boring as this one. Thanks once again, and goodbye!

[Nightfire]

How about just 'RFST' for short? Anyway, Here's a new one:

Redwall Forum Talk Show!
Badger Lord Special.

(Nightfire walk out on stage wearing her adderskin regalia.)

Nightfire: Hello, and welcome all to the Redwall Forum Talk Show! Raio Rei was getting annoying, so I fired him. Today, we will be interviewing some of the most famous Badger Lords! Today we have with us, Sunflash the Mace! Unfortunately, his Kestrel, Skarlath, couldn't be here today, due to the upcoming winter. Welcome, Sunflash!
Sunflash: Hello.
Nightfire: We also have with us Boar the Fighter! Hello, Boar!
Boar: Hi. (he stabs his broadsword into the stage floor)
Nightfire: Would you please not do that?
Boar: Sorry.
Nightfire: Our third guest is Russano the Wise. Greetings, Russano.
Russano: I am glad to be here.
Nightfire: Ahem. Today we will be interviewing each one of you. We'll start with Sunflash. Sunflash, what is it like to rule a gigantic mountain city?
Sunflash: It gets pretty...interesting. Although trying to keep five hundred hares happy and well-fed can be a challenge during the winter, when the gardens are dead."
Nightfire: I can sympathize. Trying to feed eighty Highlander Squirrels can get difficult for me, too. But what they lack in table manners, they make up for in battle skill, right?
Sunflash: Yeah, that's true.
Nightfire: Moving on. Boar the Fighter, it has been said that you are the second most Bloodwrath-y badger to ever live.
Boar: (standing up and growling) It's been said? Who is the second?! I'll tear his eyes out!!!
Nightfire: Calm down, Boar. It's Cregga Rose Eyes, and she is blind, so you can't really come through with that threat.
Boar: Fine, fine. (sits down, grumbling) Yes, I get quite mad. It's not really my fault.
Sunflash: Why on earth would your father name you Boar? You're not a boar, you're a badger.
Boar: He has terrible taste in names. Although, who could blame him, with a name like Brocktree. Can I have your name, Sunflash? It sounds so much cooler.
Sunflash: No.
Nightfire: Let's move on, shall we? Lord Russano, I was always wondering something.
Russano: Go ahead.
Nightfire: Do you actually have memories of Russa Nodrey?
Russano: I remember a red squirrel with a stick, shouting loudly. That's about it. My most vivid memories are of when I spent time with Cregga.
Boar: There's that Cregga person again! Who is she? I want to kill her! You are acting like she's more famous than me!
Russano: Calm down, Boar. Take deep , even breaths, and focus of something calming.
Boar: Don't you tell me to calm down!
Russano: Is that derision I detect in your voice?
Boar: Don't you ever get angry! Grrr. Pacifist!!
Russano: Nightfire, I advise we bring today's episode to a close quickly, before the stage is torn apart.
Nightfire: Quite. Well, folks, thanks for watching another edition of the Redwall Forum Talk Show!

(Sunflash and Russano are seen restraining Boar as Nightfire shoots the crazed badger with a toxic dart from her blowpipe. The enraged badger slumps down, paralyzed.)

[Coobreedan]

Escargoon:


Dedede:


Customer Service:

[Nightfire]

Whatever. Didja like the talk show episode I just posted? 

[Coobreedan]

Yeah!

[Nightfire]

I started a Redwall Conference too!

[White One6193]

How's about a Wearat special this time?

[Nightfire]

Er...Tiria can do a Wearat Special, wot! I'm afraid Nightfire has a bad history with wearats...

[Tiria Wildlough]

Will do! And I like 'RFST'.
Shall I make an RFST thread where we can discuss ideas?

[Nightfire]

Please do. And no more King Dedede!!! He was annoying. Nightfire shall kill him next time he shows up.