Corrupt-a-Wish

[Kade Rivok]

Granted. People are now more annoying.

I wish pianos were easier to tune.

Granted, pianos are now exceedingly easy to tune.  All the piano tuners lose their jobs and take up their pitchforks, coming after the one why ruined their livelihood.  Hope you got your running shoes on.

I wish pitchforks were actually tridents.

[Verdauga]

Granted. Now, just like poseidon, the angry piano tuners can control the sea.

I wish this was a question.

[shisteer of nothing much]

Granted but everyone still ignores it because they just go on to the next wish.

*pants* Shoot, this is not good.
I wish pitchforks weren't tridents anymore. (It's hard enough to run away from very angry, very fit, piano tuners, let alone the sea too) *continues running*

[Jarky Thistlebrush]

Granted, but tridents are now all-powerful everything-controllers.
I wish that I was free from this chaos.

[shisteer of nothing much]

Granted, but tridents are now all-powerful everything-controllers.
I wish that I was free from this chaos.

Yeah but the tridents have gone and now I'm just being chased by piano tuners with pitchforks again.

Granted but now you've trapped in a different chaos.

I wish apples would stay crunchy all year round.

[Jarky Thistlebrush]

Granted, but everything else melts so as to transfer their crunch to the apples.
I wish that I could think of a wish.

[shisteer of nothing much]

Granted. Now you can think of so many wishes that you don't know which one to choose, and all of your creativity goes into thinking of wishes so that your imagination doesn't have any time for writing fanfiction.

I wish magpies all died.

[Kade Rivok]

Granted, but they all fly to where you live before dying, leaving your abode covered in feathers and death.

I wish those piano tuners were a little more serious about chasing Teer down.  She sounds like she's having too easy of a time.

[shisteer of nothing much]

*glares at Kade* Granted. The piano tuners get more serious about chasing me and I get more serious about escaping, leading them in a loop till I reach Kade and bashing his head in on the way past. He then gets trampled by the furious piano tuners, who are sprinting hard out in an effort to catch me, quickly using up all their energy and giving up, deciding it would be easier to find another job.

I wish inflation would stop.

[Booklover]

Wish granted. However, all that happens is there are now no more party balloons, and the the cost of things still rises, just under a different name.

I wish that the piano tuners would instead learn how to play instruments so my school band actually has more than 3 keyboards, 3 glockenspiels, 3 guitars, and some random other instruments.

[Kade Rivok]

I wish inflation would stop.

Wish granted. However, all that happens is there are now no more party balloons, and the the cost of things still rises, just under a different name.

I was thinking something exceedingly different

Granted, your school band now has 3 glockenspiels, 3 guitars, some random other instruments, and roughly 70,000 keyboards.  (Amazingly enough, I googled to get that number and google actually autocompleted my question and gave me a real answer.  Why did somebody bother to figure that out how many piano tuners there are in the world?)

I could really use some ice for my body since I got brained and trampled.

[shisteer of nothing much]

Granted. *throws Kade into the Antarctic ocean, right in front of an iceberg*

I wish I was actually that good at throwing things.

[Booklover]

Wish granted, but you're no good at catching things so when somebody throws you a glass container of a poisonous gas, you drop it, let out the gas, and die.

I wish all keyboards would stop working so the piano tuners instead learn other instruments.

[shisteer of nothing much]

Granted. Now all the keyboard players get angry and chase you with burning torches and pitchforks.

I wish there were more purple flowers.

[Kade Rivok]

Granted, there are purple flowers everywhere, but they're a slightly different shade of purple than what you like, which upsets you.  The flowers know this and so are always facing you no matter where you are so you can see them more clearly.

I wish I was a nuclear icebreaker ship so that I don't get pulverized by this looming iceberg.